Can't win a game to save my life, not really motivated to play well
This is the only game I've played where the fun-factor in it was extremely situational. There are so many things that just annoy me in this game or can ruin the experience. There's always that guy who thinks he's an expert (even though we're all unranked) and bashes people and immediately spurts "GG" when someone dies. Or someone who makes racist remarks. Or someone just trolling.
Now someone will say "Hey this is an E-sport, not a game, it's not meant to be fun" or "Just mute them" or "lol get gud". And that's the problem. The amount of problems in this game are ludicrous and people just brainlessly defend them until they deal with it themselves. I even did a research project for a psychology class I took asking if people actually enjoyed this game, and most of them say that they hate this game and don't even know why they play it. And I empathize completely.
There are too many factors out of my own hands to believe that just me playing well will change my fortune in terms of wins and losses. After all, it takes just 1 person to ruin the game for 4 other people.
I just needed to get this of my chest. I'm not really sure what to do anymore.