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The 10 Commandments of League

ChexMex··127 votes·8,017 views
  1. Thou shall not blame thy teammate for thy death, for thy death was likely the cause of thy own stupidity. Thou shalt make better choices and use thy head.

  2. Thy rank reflects upon thy skill level, if subject is bronze, that person plays like bronze. If you deserve a rank, you will most definitely reach it.

  3. Our good lord Rito blessed us with the mute button, use it if you must. Careful to not use it too much, you are subject to being banned for refusing to communicate (It happened to the innocents, our good lord Rito is wrong most of the time).

  4. Thou must understand bad games occur. Just because somebody does poorly in a game does not automatically mean they are bad and should kill themselves or uninstall (Yes, players actually say this to eachother).

  5. Thou shalt not pester thy support for wards, for each good man may only place wards thrice. Be a good man of Rito and place some yourself.

  6. If thou whishest to climb upon the ladder of ELO, you must understand that even though your team is pulling you down - you must climb even harder.

  7. Worship no other Rito.

  8. Often times, players who have no idea what they are talking about think they know everything solely because they don't know exactly how much they don't know. On the flipside, players that know significantly more pressure themselves more for being ignorant. Be a good Ritostian and follow the path of Challenger with an open mind. You do not know everything, yet you do not know nothing.

  9. If thou is unranked, please do not be bashful to offer advice to other players above your rank, however please at the same time do not argue with a Challenger player thinking thou knowest more. If thou is challenger, please offer whatever advice you can give and do not belittle players for not knowing as much as you. Do not flaunt your knowledge... Or your lack of.

  10. Understand that Reginald is the only pro player without a video of his highlights.

102 Comments

EndlessSorcerer65 votes

[Commandment 0] Thou shalt kill Teemo whenever an opportunity shall arise, for the Devil resides 'neath its fur and it's blood is toxic to the righteous.

DittleLick3 votes

omg yes LOL

Commit Sudoku43 votes

Top lane Commandments

  1. Thou shall not chase singed
  2. Thou shall not 1v1 2 item Jax
  3. If thee is singed thou shall proxy always
  4. Thou shall not flame jungler for not ganking if thy is feeding
  5. Take Teleport
  6. Thou shall stack on with Nasus even if team is feeding
  7. Demaglio
  8. Thou will always take a jungle camp when shoved
  9. Take Teleport
MeesterMoo12 votes

You missed 5

Commit Sudoku20 votes

{quoted}

You missed 5

5 is a secret

lightdragoon8810 votes

Does it have anything to do with singed or teleport?

The Lexer10 votes

Take teleport as Singed, probably

Sinlaire3 votes

5: River Shen

Aevo 552 votes

{quoted}

5: River Shen

FTFY

Aych Pii4 votes

5 - If thou art melee, thy opponent shall be ranged

Narasimha12 votes

Number 5. was a full essay praising Draven. It was unable to be added due to size constraints.

Diananmen Square2 votes
  1. Thou shall save teleport in case of fight over the Mighty Dragon.
theragingnerd1 votes

[{quoted}](name=Left for Zed,realm=NA,application-id=WEuoGbmp,discussion-id=ELv5ZAjf,comment-id=0000,timestamp=2015-05-25T20:03:35.020+0000)

Top lane Commandments

  1. Thou shall not chase singed
  2. Thou shall not 1v1 2 item Jax
  3. If thee is singed thou shall proxy always
  4. Thou shall not flame jungler for not ganking if thy is feeding
  5. Take Teleport
  6. Thou shall stack on with Nasus even if team is feeding
  7. Demaglio
  8. Thou will always take a jungle camp when shoved
  9. Take Teleport

the 1v1 2 item jax was amazing

His Goatliness28 votes

And Riot said," Let there be plays". And there were plays. And Riot saw that the plays were good.

injourn21 votes

There is no Rito. This game evolved, it wasn't created!

Chaotic Reks20 votes

Viktor whispers "glorious evolution"

Jeddy0172 votes

What did this game evolved from?The original DOTA mod or something?

junglerboy164 votes

Yes, and through the process of natural selection, the "LoL" Species has out competed its more archaic Rivals DotA and HoN, although their more derived relatives, DotA 2 and other species of the "MOBA genre" genus are starting to steal away some of the LoL species' precious resources.

DstryrOFwrldz13 votes

You forgot the unknown 11th... THOU SHALT ALWAYS USE THOU PORO SNAX ON ARAM, AND THOU SHALT NEVER HARM A PORO

Decrit2 votes

What about poro rider sej? Sejuani

... see? this is why i am against poro champs or sorts.

Rikari5 votes

8 . Often times, players who have no idea what they are talking about think they know everything solely because they don't know exactly how much they don't know. On the flipside, players that know significantly more pressure themselves more for being ignorant. Be a good Ritostian and follow the path of Challenger with an open mind. You do not know everything, yet you do not know nothing.

THIS

Valhalla Rising4 votes

#2 only applies to gold+

Commit Sudoku8 votes

{quoted}

#2 only applies to gold+

not really

test account4 votes

But Faker, who in this vision informed me of all that is needed by me, answered with these words and said: ‘It was necessary that there should be trolls; but all shall be rekt, and all shall be rekt, and all manner of thing shall be rekt. These words were said most tenderly, showing no manner of blame to me nor to any who shall aspire to raise elo.

Tsumikiri3 votes

Pls let Faker be the Jesus of Ritostianism. "And ye though he has ascended to World Champion, he shall return to bring about the end times."

Occams Raiser3 votes

Thy rank reflects upon thy skill level, if subject is bronze, that person plays like bronze. If you deserve a rank, you will most definitely reach it.

If thou whishest to climb upon the ladder of ELO, you must understand that even though your team is pulling you down - you must climb even harder.

**How long will it be before some one realizes these two statements are in conflict with each other. I have tried to explain it but my words of reason are met with a level of "ridiculous" that befuddles me. **

Dylanhero2 votes

What its saying is that if you deserve gold and your bronze, you'll be able to carry your lesser skilled team mates to victory. To climb the ladder, you have to be generally better (and therefore carry) your team mates. If your not, that means your the same skill level as the rest of your group and are the rank you deserve.

ChexMex3 votes

[{quoted}](name=Occams Raiser,realm=NA,application-id=WEuoGbmp,discussion-id=ELv5ZAjf,comment-id=0007,timestamp=2015-05-25T22:49:14.965+0000)

**How long will it be before some one realizes these two statements are in conflict with each other. I have tried to explain it but my words of reason are met with a level of "ridiculous" that befuddles me. **

it is how you must understand, young padawan. that if you carry harder than your team drags you down - you definitely deserve a rank, and therefore you will achieve it.

finemw13 votes

the 11th commandment : though shalt not chase Singed

Rockabananza3 votes

Let me adjust your commandments a bit.

  1. Thou shalt play Draven.

  2. Thou shalt play Draven.

  3. Thou shalt play Draven.

  4. Thou shalt play Draven.

  5. Thou shalt play Draven.

  6. Thou shalt play Draven.

  7. Thou shalt play Draven.

  8. Thou shalt play Draven.

  9. Thou shalt play Draven.

  10. Thou may play any champion that does not break the other nine commandments.

Devack The Holy3 votes

Commandment 1A: The only exception is when your allied Volibear/Lee Sin, etc flings/kicks the enemy fed champ into your face and they kill you. Then it's on them.

The Lexer2 votes

How does one pronounce "Ritostian"

YOLO420SWAGSCOPE5 votes

Ree-toss-tee-an

Transgressor2 votes

reeh-toast-yeean

huehuehue

CBosss1 votes

Not "Ritostian"..... "Draaaaaaaaven"

Lugg2 votes

1 is correct 99% of the time, but there are times your teammate could have saved you easily. 2 isn't always true. I have seen Bronze guys play in Gold and Plat games and carry hard. 3-5 great advice.

Lorinne9 votes

2 is true in the since that if your current rank doesn't reflect your skill level, if you play ranked enough you will climb to your appropriate skill level. Those Bronzies that can hold their own against higher ranked players are capable of climbing, just as the commandment says.

SpongebobIsLife2 votes

Idk man, I have a friend who is diamond 4 on 2 of his accounts but can't climb out of bronze on this one.

Spacesuit Spiff1 votes

I'm diamond and I win more in diamond than bronze, just because my playstyle is based on diamond. Wouldn't be terribly hard to pick up a mechanics champ to dumpster bronze players though.

BlunterMonk2 votes

#5, I can't agree more.

HouseCat014 votes

what is up with your font size? like why?

SmokinSickStyle1 votes

Your post is why i'm an Atheist.

ChexMex7 votes

{quoted}

Your post is why i'm an Atheist.

dont be bashful, just admit you believe in our good lord Rito

FunkmasterFunk1 votes

[{quoted}](name=Vayne Hentai,realm=NA,application-id=WEuoGbmp,discussion-id=ELv5ZAjf,comment-id=,timestamp=2015-05-25T19:57:00.494+0000)

  1. Thou shall not blame thy teammate for thy death, for thy death was likely the cause of thy own stupidity. Thou shalt make better choices and use thy head.

Except for when Blitzcrank decides to pull Amumu into the middle of your team.

ChexMex4 votes

{quoted}

Except for when Blitzcrank decides to pull Amumu into the middle of your team.

this shalt be named truth lest our pernicious enemies attempt to argue your point.

thus why the original commandment states "Was likely".

Vekkna1 votes

Disagree with Commandment #2. I got out of promos at Silver 2 (now Silver 3), and if you look at my match history it clearly shows that I'm not good enough to be silver. I shouldn't even really be playing ranked, actually, but it's less afkers and quitters to deal with.

ChexMex2 votes

{quoted}

Disagree with Commandment #2. I got out of promos at Silver 2 (now Silver 3), and if you look at my match history it clearly shows that I'm not good enough to be silver. I shouldn't even really be playing ranked, actually, but it's less afkers and quitters to deal with.

My padawan, this is where commandment 8 comes into play. You think you are bad when you are not. Some players think they are good when they are not.

Vekkna1 votes

If there was a dictionary entry for "objectively bad at LoL," my match history would be the content of the entire entry. There's just no other way of reading it. If I'm secretly good, it's an extremely well-kept secret.

Look over my match history and revise commandment 2 as needed. ;D

ChexMex1 votes

{quoted}

If there was a dictionary entry for "objectively bad at LoL," my match history would be the content of the entire entry. There's just no other way of reading it. If I'm secretly good, it's an extremely well-kept secret.

Look over my match history and revise commandment 2 as needed. ;D

What you learn in science is 99.99% true on a PhD level.

What you learn from my commandments are always true. I'm afraid I am going to have to ban you for infringement upon our Rito word.

TheKaymon1 votes

It's not as bad as you make it sound.

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