Help playing the Jungle role

Jungle is my most hated lane, and my worst that I play. I hate it because the enemy jungler can counter jungle you, therefore putting you behind. I hate that the jungle is so hard now, if you go for a red or blue buff after your leash, the enemy jungler can jump on you after you are about dead from getting the buff already, get first blood and your buff you worked so hard to get. I don't like the responsibility of having to be everywhere at once, gank everyone, and call for objectives like drag and baron. I never know when is a good time to go for drag because of the fear of the enemy having it warded and they come in and steal, especially if I don't have my whole team with me. It's also hard calling everyone to come help get drag.

I also have a limited pool of jungler champions that I play, and the excessively OP ones like Jax, Xin, and Lee I rarely play. I never know when it's good to pick a tanky, lock down CC jungler like Amumu, or take a high mobility fighter/tank like Vi, or a mage/assassin like Nid or Diana. Today, I decided to play some Jungle after doing mid for how many days straight, and took Vi. I get a leash at gromp, go for blue. One second after I take blue buff, Xin comes out of nowhere, kills me and takes my buff for first blood. That made me so mad, but I also knew it was my fault for not warding. He then spiraled out of control and got fed, basically because the rest of my team specifically bot lane fed him.

Next two games with Vi, basically same thing, I had trolls and feeders. Also teammates that just wouldn't listen or come to help, and the enemy jungler got fed. I also got so behind I could barely do any damage. It's gotten me so frustrated I just want to scream.

Any help is appreciated. I just don't know how to play Jungle right and do well playing it too. I rarely get a good game as the jungler.