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Eleanora, Torment's Beauty

The Dreamwalker··5 votes·512 views

Hi everyone! So, I was thinking a lot, and I mean a lot about a new champion! As I am sure most of us know, there are only 4 definitive members of the Black Rose. Eleanora answers that question of who is the fifth member, well, wonder no longer because I present Eleanora, Torment's Beauty!

Basics and Stats:

Homeland: Noxus

Friends: Leblanc, Swain, Vladimir, Elise

Rivals: N/A

Class: Mage

Secondary: Assassin

**Lane: Middle (MID) **

__

Stats

Health: 530 (+69 per level)

Health Regeneration: 5.7 (+.5 per level)

Mana: 390 (+60 per level)

Mana Regeneration: 6.2 (+.8 per level)

Armor: 32 (+3.4 per level)

Magic Resistance: 30 (+.5 per level)

Attack Damage: 55 (+2.7 per level)

Attack Speed: 0.665 (+2.8% per level)

Movement speed: 330 (+0 per level)

__

Abilities

Passive: Torment's Respite

When Eleanora enters combat with an enemy champion, they receive a stack of Trauma. Attacking a champion inflicted with Trauma will fill the mark (see Fizz W). Once the marked has been filled, the mark will be consumed and the champion will be feared for 1 second.

  • If Eleanora hasn't filled the mark for 2 seconds, it dissipates.
  • An enemy champion cannot be marked for the next 12 seconds (gradually scales down to 5 seconds, immune to CDR).

Working credited to Arakadia

__

Q: Affinity

Range: 1000

Type: Skillshot

Mana: 30/35/40/45/50

Eleanora tosses forth a dark flame that traces along a steady path, dealing 50/90/130/170/210 (+75% AP) magical damage to all enemies along the path.

Cooldown: 8 seconds

__

W: Stinging Swarm

Range: 975

Type: AoE

Mana: 60/80/100/120/140

Eleanora summons a swarm of stinging creatures to attack a selected area. The swarm will spread out and attack various targets, dealing 30/35/40/45/50 (+25% AP) magical damage and slows the targets struck by 40/45/50/55/60%. If the swarm kills a target, they gain 5 damage and .5 extra seconds on their duration, and will move onto another target. At anytime during the duration, the swarm can be commanded to move onto an enemy unit if Eleanora aa's that target, or if Eleanora is being attacked.

Cooldown: 12/11/10/9/8 seconds

__

E: Hexer's Choice

Range: 1000

Type: AoE

Mana: 90 (all levels)

Eleanora is prompted to choose a hex. She knows 3 primary hexes.

  1. Pentagram of Life Transferal - After the hex settles, Eleanora heals for 35% of the damage inflicted. Then 5% per second for the remainder of the hex. This hex deals 50/80/110/140/170 (+80% AP) magical damage.

  2. Glyph of Paralysis - After the hex is settled, enemies will be immediately paralyzed (stunned) for 1/1/1.5/1.5/2 seconds and take in 50/70/90/110/130 (+80% AP) magical damage.

  3. Death Hex - Enemies who stand on this hex will take in 20/25/30/35/40% increased damage from Eleanora's next ability. If they leave the hex, the debuff remains for 1.5 seconds. This hex deals 60/100/140/180/240 (+80% AP) magical damage.

Hexes take 1.5 seconds to settle and last for 2 seconds.

Cooldown: 15/13.5/12/10.5/9 seconds

__

R: Despair

Range: 1

Type: Ability Buff

Mana: 100

Eleanora fuels her next ability with all of her power, empowering the ability with an additional, unique effect.

Q: Affinity

The fire now burns all targets hit for 75/100/125 (+50% AP) magical damage. Additionally, the flames will seek enemy champions.

W: Stinging Swarm

The Swarm now silences all enemies they attack for as long as they attack them.

E: Hexer's Choice

Pentagram of Life Transferal - Allies (including Eleanora) who stand on the hex will be cleansed off all DoT effects.

Glyph of Paralysis - Allies (including Eleanora) who stand on the hex cannot be cc'ed for as long as they stand on the hex.

Death Hex - Enemies who stood on the hex will become cursed and not be able to heal.

__

Gameplay / Theme

Eleanora is suppose to be a mage that likes to torment her enemy. I feel that I accomplished that. That is how her kit was formed. Her gameplay is really to focus down a target before turning to face the larger group. So, she would do brutally well in hunting down the adc and enemy mid laner (as that is what mid laners do mid - late game).

Does she fit the Black Rose?

I think so. Members of the Black Rose specialize in Dark Magic, and she does that. Also, I think she is a good addition to the Rose for a certain reason. She helps cover all sides of the Black Rose.

Elise - Covers the shapeshifting side.

Vladimir - Covers hemomancy

Leblanc - Covers illusions

Swain - (As of right now) I'm guessing he is suppose to be something with agony, but he is getting updated, so I am not sure if that will remain.

Eleanora provides that definitive yes, she likes to torment people through dark hexes and such.

__

Artwork

http://imgur.com/1UHClr3

Link

Done by phamoz (reposted on pinterest)

__

Lore

IN THE WORKS

__

Interactions

WIP

CHANGES AND UPDATES

7/25: release of draft 1.

7/25: addition of Ultimate basics.

7/25: addition of base stats, moved to top of page

7/25: alternate ultimate choice shown

7/26: Ultimate completely changed.

7/26: Q: Agony changed to Q: Affinity

7/26: Q: Affinity changed to skillshot from targeted.

7/26: Ranges on W: Stinging Swarm and E: Hexer's Choice reduced. Range on Q: Affinity increased.

7/26: Hexes changed from Vow of Silence and Blinding Word changed to Pentagram of Life Transferal and Death Hex.

7/26: Passive reconstructed to fit theme.

THIS IDEA IS A WIP. VOTES DO NOT HELP. COMMENTS ARE THE MOST HELPFUL THING YOU CAN PROVIDE. IF YOU CAN COMMENT ABOUT ANYTHING THAT NEEDS TWEAKS, REBALANCE, OR SOMETHING YOU HAVE THAT CAN REPLACE ONE OF THEA ABILITIES I HAVE LISTED, THEN PLEASE COMMENT!!! <3 THANKS.

12 Comments

Arakadia3 votes

Hey! I know how wonderful feedback can be so I'm here to help!

I'm going to comment on her entire kit except for her ultimate. Sorry, I don't have much to say about it.

Note, AP is not a stat that is gained per level. Every champion starts with 0 base AP and doesn't get any per level with a few exceptions like Ryze and Viktor where their passives help them out.

Enemies that get too close to Eleanora are hit with Torment's Grace. This is a debuff that hinders an enemy attack and defense that builds over time. The debuff will go away rapidly once out of the range of Eleanora's passive. The debuff starts at 5% (+5% AP) and increases by 1.5 per second.

First I would like to know what you mean by hindering enemy attack and defense over time. What I assume is that they do 5% (+5% of AP) less damage and take 5% (+5% of AP) more damage. But you should clarify what that debuff does.

Second this passive seems very odd for a mage assassin. It fits more for a support character.

Finally I don't like it. It's not very interactive and all she does is stand next to you. I'd rather you rework it into something more interesting, thematic, and fitting for a burst mage.

Q: Agony

Range: 750

Type: Targeted

Mana: 30/35/40/45/50

This deals 30/40/50/60/70 (+30% AP) magical damage. If an enemy is affected by any of Eleanora's other abilities (within the last 2 seconds), she will deal double damage (this includes the AP scaling).

I like that this spell encourages combos however its a shit spell for a few reasons. First, it does like no damage. At all. Its scaling is bad and its base damage is bad that you might do more damage by auto attacking. In fact for most of the early game you would.

Its also a targeted burst spell which I dont like. Or its supposed to be burst but it isn't.

Finally it doesn't live up to be a spell called Agony. Agony should make the enemy player feel the torment. It shouldn't just be a targeted short attack.

W: Stinging Swarm

Range: 1000

Type: AoE

Mana: 60/80/100/120/140

Eleanora summons a swarm of stinging creatures to attack a selected area. The swarm will spread out and attack various targets, dealing 30/35/40/45/50 (+25% AP) magical damage and slows the targets struck by 40/45/50/55/60%. If the swarm kills a target, they gain 5 damage and .5 extra seconds on their duration, and will move onto another target. At anytime during the duration, the swarm can be commanded to move onto an enemy unit if Eleanora aa's that target, or if Eleanora is being attacked.

I like this spell. Its cool but its not a very unique summon. You kinda just fire it on the enemy and the swarm will do the rest by chasing them down. I do like the base theme and function though.

E: Hexer's Choice

Range: 1150

Type: AoE

Mana: 90 (all levels)

Eleanora is prompted to choose a hex. She knows 3 primary hexes.

Vow of Silence - Enemies are silenced for as long as they stand on the hex, and for .5 seconds after leaving the hex.

Glyph of Paralysis - After the hex is settled, enemies will be immediately paralyzed (stunned) for 2 seconds.

Blinding Word - The hex causes enemies standing on the hex to miss autoattacks for as long as they stand on the hex, and .5 seconds after leaving the hex.

Each hex deals 80/120/160/200/240 (+80% AP) magical damage upon being settled. Hexes take 1.25 seconds to settle. Hexes last 2 seconds.

Cooldown: 15/13.5/12/10.5/9 seconds

This spell absolutely needs some changing. 100% of the time it would be better to take Glyph of Paralysis. There is no reason to pick the others. A 2 second stun is way better than a conditional 2.5 second silence/disarm that most of the time will be a lower duration cause they can walk out of it. And they all do the same damage so you don't have to choose between utility and damage like Twisted Fate does.

Give the other Hexes some reason to be picked. Each should serve a purpose with a niche. For TF, blue card is damage and mana return, gold card is CC, and red card is honestly just AoE waveclear.

Well theres your feedback. Hope its helps. I might be able to review a bit more later if I have the time. I can discuss some stuff though if your confused or you disagree. Thanks for sharing your concept.

The Dreamwalker2 votes

{quoted}

Hey! I know how wonderful feedback can be so I'm here to help!

I'm going to comment on her entire kit except for her ultimate. Sorry, I don't have much to say about it.

Note, AP is not a stat that is gained per level. Every champion starts with 0 base AP and doesn't get any per level with a few exceptions like Ryze and Viktor where their passives help them out.

First I would like to know what you mean by hindering enemy attack and defense over time. What I assume is that they do 5% (+5% of AP) less damage and take 5% (+5% of AP) more damage. But you should clarify what that debuff does.

Second this passive seems very odd for a mage assassin. It fits more for a support character.

Finally I don't like it. It's not very interactive and all she does is stand next to you. I'd rather you rework it into something more interesting, thematic, and fitting for a burst mage.

Yea, the passive was my main thing with her. I tried to find many different things, but it was either taken or very similar to another champion. I am working on that (tbh, I don't like it either, that is something I have been working on changing).

I like that this spell encourages combos however its a shit spell for a few reasons. First, it does like no damage. At all. Its scaling is bad and its base damage is bad that you might do more damage by auto attacking. In fact for most of the early game you would.

Its also a targeted burst spell which I dont like. Or its supposed to be burst but it isn't.

Okay, changes incoming!

Finally it doesn't live up to be a spell called Agony. Agony should make the enemy player feel the torment. It shouldn't just be a targeted short attack.

Hmm, perhaps I could do something to make people really feel the pain.

I like this spell. Its cool but its not a very unique summon. You kinda just fire it on the enemy and the swarm will do the rest by chasing them down. I do like the base theme and function though.

Okay, so is this one good?

This spell absolutely needs some changing. 100% of the time it would be better to take Glyph of Paralysis. There is no reason to pick the others. A 2 second stun is way better than a conditional 2.5 second silence/disarm that most of the time will be a lower duration cause they can walk out of it. And they all do the same damage so you don't have to choose between utility and damage like Twisted Fate does.

Give the other Hexes some reason to be picked. Each should serve a purpose with a niche. For TF, blue card is damage and mana return, gold card is CC, and red card is honestly just AoE waveclear.

So, currently I face the Heim problem. Alright, I will find something to increase the benefit of the others.

Well theres your feedback. Hope its helps. I might be able to review a bit more later if I have the time. I can discuss some stuff though if your confused or you disagree. Thanks for sharing your concept.

I loved your feedback! You were very nice. You didn't completely trash my idea, and you were very constructive. You gave me viewpoints on how to better fix Eleanora.

Passive - probably being changed to do something more with her powers.

Q - probably being changed to an oppressive slow / DoT (drain thing)

W - Fine as it is.

E - Benefits being changed (3 different ccs are kinda strange, I will do something new).

R - Was it bad or was it good? Which one do you prefer?

NOTE: You should see changes around 10 A.M. Eastern Time (USA & Canada)

Edit: Changes around 5 P.M.

Arakadia1 votes

Alrighty!

The Dreamwalker1 votes

{quoted}

Alrighty!

Eleanora is ready for round 2 if you want to take a look.

Arakadia1 votes

Hey, sorry I took a bit to respond but I'm here now! I'll start off by saying it does look better.

Passive: Torment's Respite

Enemies Eleanora fights begin to stack a secondary (third, in some cases) that upon being filled with fear, causing them to flee for 1 second. Enemies loose all stacks of the bar if they are not attacked by Eleanora within 2 seconds.

Enemies may not be stacked more than once every 5 seconds.

So what it looks like to me is that when Eleanora enters combat with an enemy champion, and they get another bar above their heads. Attacking the champion will fill the bar and once its filled they will be inflicted with the Fear debuff for one second. If thats correct, there is a better way to word it cause it is a bit confusing. You could do something like this:

Passive: Torment's Respite:

When Eleanora enters combat with an enemy champion, they receive a stack of Trauma. Attacking a champion inflicted with Trauma will fill the mark (see Fizz W). Once the marked has been filled, the mark will be consumed and the champion will be feared for 1 second.

  • If Eleanora hasn't filled the mark for 2 seconds, it dissipates.
  • An enemy champion cannot be marked for the next 5 seconds.

Now this passive is a lot more interesting. Its an interactive passive, on that almost feels like an active. However it still has down time which allows for enemies to counter it. Which is good.

I have too suggestions. Increase the mark duration after not filling it from 2 seconds to 4 maybe. You need more time to apply the mark and a mage isn't going to be constantly standing in range attacking they often weave around minions, angle themselves in fights, and move around.

The second suggestion is to increase how long a champion cannot be marked. There needs to be more downtown for counterplay. You could do something like 10/8/6 seconds based on ult range for how long, have it scale so her passive is more useful later in the game. In the early game she can pressure you with a no cost fear every 5 seconds with all her kits damage behind it, so having the cooldown scale as the game goes on is a good idea.

Q: Affinity

Range: 1000

Type: Skillshot

Mana: 30/35/40/45/50

Eleanora tosses forth a dark flame that traces along a steady path, dealing 50/90/130/170/210 (+75% AP) magical damage to all enemies along the path.

Now this spell is going to feel a lot more impactful due to it having solid damage. It seems a little too simple for me, although not every champion needs to be Azir, so I would try to give it a unique way of dealing damage or something. Even if its just a unique cast shape hitbox like Grave's Q.

E: Hexer's Choice

Range: 1000

Type: AoE

Mana: 90 (all levels)

Eleanora is prompted to choose a hex. She knows 3 primary hexes.

Pentagram of Life Transferal - After the hex settles, Eleanora heals for 35% of the damage inflicted. Then 5% per second for the remainder of the hex.

Glyph of Paralysis - After the hex is settled, enemies will be immediately paralyzed (stunned) for 2 seconds.

Death Hex - Enemies who stand on this hex will take in 20/25/30/35/40% increased damage from Eleanora's next ability. If they leave the hex, the debuff remains for 1.5 seconds.

Each hex deals 80/120/160/200/240 (+80% AP) magical damage upon being settled. Hexes take 1.25 seconds to settle. Hexes last 2 seconds.

Cooldown: 15/13.5/12/10.5/9 seconds

This ability has been improved a lot. These were some good changes and you need only some number tuning to finish the job.

First of all each hex should do a different amount of damage. Like TF's W, having unique amounts of damage for each hex will further define why you should use each hex. I would have Death Hex do the most damage, specifying it as the damage hex, Pentagram of Life Transferal being the second highest damage hex, as if it were the lowest the healing would be bad, and then having Glyph of Paralysis doing the least damage because CC is incredibly powerful. Forcing the enemy to stand still and not retaliate is perfect for a mage so their should be other reasons to pick the other hex's.

Also, a 2 second stun is way too powerful, especially when it does the same damage as the other hexes. I would have it start at one second and scale up to 2 seconds by ranking the ability.

And there ya go. I hope I help, I too love the Black Rose. One note is on the stats section you have AP listed. You should remove that as no champion has AP as a base state.

I don't have too much to say about the ult (sorry D:) but you should try and decide on a single ultimate in future concepts as it does a few things:

  • Shows your commitment.
  • Makes the post easier to read.
  • Helps finalize the concept so there is a clear playstyle and character made.
The Dreamwalker2 votes

{quoted}

Hey, sorry I took a bit to respond but I'm here now! I'll start off by saying it does look better.

No problem. You comments are much appreciated, so I am willing to wait. C^:

So what it looks like to me is that when Eleanora enters combat with an enemy champion, and they get another bar above their heads. Attacking the champion will fill the bar and once its filled they will be inflicted with the Fear debuff for one second. If thats correct, there is a better way to word it cause it is a bit confusing. You could do something like this:

I like the way you worded it (for some reason it disappeared when I went to reply).

Now this passive is a lot more interesting. Its an interactive passive, on that almost feels like an active. However it still has down time which allows for enemies to counter it. Which is good.

I have too suggestions. Increase the mark duration after not filling it from 2 seconds to 4 maybe. You need more time to apply the mark and a mage isn't going to be constantly standing in range attacking they often weave around minions, angle themselves in fights, and move around.

Okay, it took me a moment to catch your meaning, I could work with that.

The second suggestion is to increase how long a champion cannot be marked. There needs to be more downtown for counterplay. You could do something like 10/8/6 seconds based on ult range for how long, have it scale so her passive is more useful later in the game. In the early game she can pressure you with a no cost fear every 5 seconds with all her kits damage behind it, so having the cooldown scale as the game goes on is a good idea.

That sounds great. Maybe start a little higher like 12 seconds to start with a gradual decrease that cannot be affected by CDR (like Lissandra's passive).

Now this spell is going to feel a lot more impactful due to it having solid damage. It seems a little too simple for me, although not every champion needs to be Azir, so I would try to give it a unique way of dealing damage or something. Even if its just a unique cast shape hitbox like Grave's Q.

Hmm, perhaps I could give the power that feeling of safety before making it do damage. Something like she casts it, it doesn't do damage right away, but Eleanora can activate the flames to then deal the damage, or something like that.

This ability has been improved a lot. These were some good changes and you need only some number tuning to finish the job.

First of all each hex should do a different amount of damage. Like TF's W, having unique amounts of damage for each hex will further define why you should use each hex. I would have Death Hex do the most damage, specifying it as the damage hex, Pentagram of Life Transferal being the second highest damage hex, as if it were the lowest the healing would be bad, and then having Glyph of Paralysis doing the least damage because CC is incredibly powerful. Forcing the enemy to stand still and not retaliate is perfect for a mage so their should be other reasons to pick the other hex's.

I see. That makes a lot of sense.

Also, a 2 second stun is way too powerful, especially when it does the same damage as the other hexes. I would have it start at one second and scale up to 2 seconds by ranking the ability.

Good note.

And there ya go. I hope I help, I too love the Black Rose. One note is on the stats section you have AP listed. You should remove that as no champion has AP as a base state.

I don't have too much to say about the ult (sorry D:) but you should try and decide on a single ultimate in future concepts as it does a few things:

  • Shows your commitment.
  • Makes the post easier to read.
  • Helps finalize the concept so there is a clear playstyle and character made.

I reworked the ulty though, and I am committed. Otherwise I would have left it and moved on. I understand and agree with the points, but when I am stuck on a ult, I want the community's feedback on which they prefer. If you noticed, when I "reworked" my idea I removed the two ults and replaced them with a single one.

Anyways, back to critiquing the champion.

p.s. I usually leave ideas with 1 ult, but sometimes I like knowing which idea people like more.

Beas7ie2 votes

That's not Eleanora!

That's Yennifer!

Get original artwork!

The Dreamwalker2 votes

{quoted}

That's not Eleanora!

That's Yennifer!

Get original artwork!

It's a different take on Yennifer that someone else created. I had to look up who Yennifer was, I don't play that game. Also, note this.

http://imgur.com/umhXImG

Edit: If you are wondering why that is there, it is because Riot can make look a like champions that represent other characters from other games (shows, books, etc.), or at least reference them.

Edit (2): The artwork is original. Someone did take the time to draw it. Link

Edit (3): Also, really? You comment about a picture that is literally about 10% of what the character is? I just like having a picture that represents what I think the character looks like. The main sum of a character is the kit and lore.

Beas7ie3 votes

[{quoted}](name=The Dreamwalker,realm=NA,application-id=A8FQeEA8,discussion-id=y7VOIpJE,comment-id=00000000,timestamp=2017-07-25T14:45:29.457+0000)

It's a different take on Yennifer that someone else created. I had to look up who Yennifer was, I don't play that game. Also, note this.

http://imgur.com/umhXImG

Edit: If you are wondering why that is there, it is because Riot can make look a like champions that represent other characters from other games (shows, books, etc.), or at least reference them.

Edit (2): The artwork is original. Someone did take the time to draw it. Link

Edit (3): Also, really? You comment about a picture that is literally about 10% of what the character is? I just like having a picture that represents what I think the character looks like. The main sum of a character is the kit and lore.

No the main sum of a character is having original artwork of them. Lore smore, kit smit. You have to commission only the best and greatest artists to get super awesome original artwork of them(at least a dozen pieces), a 3d model, and a 3d printed action figure, before you can even claim to BE close to having a character that can be made for the game.

So get to work on that.

Also why did you post a pic of Sona and Hatsune Miku with that comment? Those characters are very different and look completely different. No resemblance to each at all.

S0und161 votes

{quoted}

No the main sum of a character is having original artwork of them. Lore smore, kit smit. You have to commission only the best and greatest artists to get super awesome original artwork of them(at least a dozen pieces), a 3d model, and a 3d printed action figure, before you can even claim to BE close to having a character that can be made for the game.

This made me laugh. You get an upvote.

Beas7ie2 votes

{quoted}

This made me laugh. You get an upvote.

Glad someone finally gets the joke.

The Dreamwalker1 votes

{quoted}

No the main sum of a character is having original artwork of them. Lore smore, kit smit. You have to commission only the best and greatest artists to get super awesome original artwork of them(at least a dozen pieces), a 3d model, and a 3d printed action figure, before you can even claim to BE close to having a character that can be made for the game.

Riot says they draw up the character before the character's art or model is even created. They focus on a story first (told in the creation of Rakan and Xayah story). Then, they focus on a kit that helps that theme, and they don't like the kit or feel it doesn't follow their theme they rework the champion. The artwork is the cherry on top.

So get to work on that.

Also why did you post a pic of Sona and Hatsune Miku with that comment? Those characters are very different and look completely different. No resemblance to each at all.

O.O It is League tradition to compare Sona to Hatsune Miku.

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