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Valeria, the Void Sorceress

The Dreamwalker··8 votes·1,235 views

So, I was thinking of a new and fun idea for League. We recently got our second Darkin, so what if we got an another female void character?

RekSai - Was the first female void character.

I was reading some character lore on their League page, and I was interested by Malzahar's lore. I think I found a way to implement another character seamlessly into the game. So, with that, I present Valeria, the Void Sorceress.

Basics

Homeland: The Void

Gender: Female

Friends: Malzahar and KogMaw

Rivals: Kassadin

Class: Mage

Lane: MID

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Abilities

Passive: Fragments of Power

As Valeria fights her foes, she will gather fragments of power. She can only forge 3 void gems out of these fragments. Void gems give Valeria's abilities a new, unique side effect if the point is spent there. She gathers more fragments for enemies she kills or assists in killing. She gather small amounts of fragments from jg camps and minions.

(Upgrades will be posted with the ability)

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Q: Lifeless Sphere

Range: 1000

Mana: 55/60/65/70/75

Valeria launches sphere of black flame at a target. The sphere will slow the target by 60% for 1.5 seconds and deal 60/80/100/120/140 (+55% AP) magical damage.

Void Gem: Lifeless Sphere now has an electrified attack that launches 40/45/50/55/60% of the damage to other enemies and changes the slow into a stun that lasts 1.5 seconds. This will hit up to 5 additional targets for a total of 6.

The upgrade is similar to the passive effect of item 3087.

Cooldown: 12/11/10/9/8 seconds

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W: Desolate Spark

Range: 975

Mana: 60/75/90/105/120

Valeria conjures a powerful bolt from the sky to strike a targeted area for 80/110/140/170/200 (+80% AP) magical damage. The ability takes 1 second to charge up before the bolt strikes.

Void Gem: Desolate Spark now leaves an electrified field that strikes targets for 20/25/30/35/40 damage per second (field lasts 3 seconds).

Cooldown: 10/9/8/7/6 seconds

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E: Charmer's Woe

Range: 650

Mana: 20/25/30/35/40

Whenever Valeria is near someone recently affected by her powers, she can activate this ability to charm her enemies for .75 seconds, and she can deal 15% of the damage inflicted upon her with in the past 3 seconds, and 30% of the damage she inflicted to her enemies within the past 3 seconds. The ability also deals 50/80/110/140/170 (+60%) AP magical damage to enemies affected by cc.

Void Gem: Valeria gains an empowered spellvamp on her next ability worth 20-35% after casting Charmer's Woe. The affect lasts until Valeria casts another spell.

Cooldown: 5 seconds

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R: Geminae Animarum

Range: 750

Mana: 100

(Done in credit to ThorOdinson54)

Valeria chooses a targeted enemy champion before vanishing form sight. Valeria has 1.5 seconds to choose which direction she would like to face the target (behind, left, in front, right). Once chosen, she will re-appear along with three clones surrounding the target (in a wide circle).The clones and Valeria channel for 1.5 seconds. The channel can be interrupted by hard cc. If a clone is struck, they are defeated. After the channel, Valeria deals 300/450/600 (+25/50/75 bonus magical damage per clone) (+85% AP) magical damage.

Void gem: Clones now have a life-bar that must be depleted before vanishing.

Cooldown: 135/90/45 seconds

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Artwork

http://imgur.com/ypQl6j0

Done by the amazing liuato!

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Lore

Valeria is name so foul and so malicious that it is considered an act of treason to even mutter the name. Her name was all but lost to the works of time. Men and women alike live in fear of the temptress' heavenly tune, for those that hear it, never return, and if they do, they are never the same. Scholars have noted that those she feasts off have a lost and empty look upon their eyes, even their flesh seems to have lost that lively spark. It almost makes them seem even more lifeless than the dead themselves. But, that is the very nature and true power of Valeria.

Valeria is creature of lust and hunger. She uses men and women to fill her cravings, as well as feeding her internal strife for power. To captivate her prey, she cast aside her terrific voidborn form and assume a more pleasing and attractive look. It is said that after her earthly cravings are met, she kills her prey and absorbs their spark. After this, she has little to no need for the corpse of her meal, so she leaves her prey for another of her void brethren, the Mouth of the Abyss. It was a seemingly perfect pact. Valeria receives the essence of her foes and fulfills her cravings, and Kog'Maw receives a meal. It wasn't until a few years after their pact was forged that the two decided to use their gifts of being voidborn to mettle with the mortal world. Valeria and Kog'Maw set their eyes on the young prophet of Icathia. It was by Valeria's charms that he was drawn to the forgotten city, and after this, she gave him up to Kog'Maw. In a way, Valeria bound the two together.

Their acts are proof the Void's intentions on the world of Runeterra. Pity those who are caught off-guard by the Void Sorceress for her tunes and charms are as deceitful and crushing as candy-coated misery. Fare thee well and watch out for the rise of the Void Sorceress, for the day she is united with her brethren in Runeterra, is a day that world will truly end.

(I am gonna continue tweaking this, but this is good enough for a general insight into Valeria.)

35 Comments

Rockman3 votes

Too simplistic and boring.

A. Sol, Anivia, Syndra all have worse versions of her Q.

W is a Zeus W from Dota 2. That's bad.

E has no business being on anything, tank or otherwise.

R is literally a worse version of Heimerdinger R

Overall 2/10 for effort

HalcyonDweller9 votes

Dude, I disagree with a lot of their ideas too, but this was uncalled for. You were extremely rude when it was completely unnecessary.

Rockman2 votes

{quoted}

Dude, I disagree with a lot of their ideas too, but this was uncalled for. You were extremely rude when it was completely unnecessary.

If you consider that rude you should get some more perspective on what rudeness is.

HalcyonDweller4 votes

You pooh-poohed their ideas, called it simplistic and boring, accused them of copying abilities and doing it poorly, and gave them a demeaning rating.

Nearly every thing you said is most easily interpreted as dismissive, hurtful, and demeaning. I cannot believe that you don't understand how your words might be perceived this way by the recipients.

If that isn't the textbook definition of stifling artistic expression then I don't know what is.

Cana Alberona3 votes

^[slayer-jinx-catface]

ModThe Djinn7 votes

{quoted}

Too simplistic and boring.

A. Sol, Anivia, Syndra all have worse versions of her Q.

W is a Zeus W from Dota 2. That's bad.

E has no business being on anything, tank or otherwise.

R is literally a worse version of Heimerdinger R

Overall 2/10 for effort

Just a friendly reminder -- it's fine to express your disagreement with a design, but constructive critique is more helpful than simply a list of things you dislike. This sort of excessive negativity with little in the way of constructive comments is something we'd like to discourage in favor of responses that are a little more actionable.

Rockman2 votes

[{quoted}](name=The Djinn,realm=NA,application-id=A8FQeEA8,discussion-id=WW1hFmIt,comment-id=00000001,timestamp=2017-07-10T17:46:33.985+0000)

Just a friendly reminder -- it's fine to express your disagreement with a design, but constructive critique is more helpful than simply a list of things you dislike. This sort of excessive negativity with little in the way of constructive comments is something we'd like to discourage in favor of responses that are a little more actionable.

The kit itself is simplistic. If there was complexity to discuss I would. To say a statement and then examples of how the kit is overly simplistic is "excessive negativity" is mind boggling.

Q is a point and click stun W is point and click damage E might as well exist on a tank R just increases your damage

If you need me to explain further you already don't understand the simple concepts I just listed.

There needs to be actual substance before anybody can actually bring substance to the critique. The passive is the only fully formed idea I could critique positively, and even then it's been designed as if she's a support.

HalcyonDweller3 votes

Lack of substance is not grounds for dismissing an idea.

And it's more an issue because of the way that you went about calling it simplistic. You could have said, "I wish the ability had more complexity to it" but instead you said, "it's a bad copy of other abilities." See the difference?

Another thing to consider is, "what if anything could the OP do to improve, and have I identified that for them in a respectful manner?"

You didn't provide any new suggestions for directions to take the design in or additions to make to the kit. This is important when commenting on champion design threads.

  • Calling something stupid is a lot less helpful than saying, "I don't think that works because 'X', why don't you try 'Y' instead?"
  • Calling something unoriginal is a lot less helpful than saying, "That overlaps A's design space, what if it were changed to do <insert cool design idea here> in order to further differentiate it from those designs?"

Calling something bad is not helpful. So you should instead focus on offering suggestions for changes or additions.

( I'd like to clarify that I don't think OP's design is stupid, unoriginal or bad. I'm just referencing tones and opinions you seem to have expressed, as examples for what I mean when I say, "you should be more helpful and less dismissive." )

Rockman3 votes

{quoted}

Lack of substance is not grounds for dismissing an idea.

And it's more an issue because of the way that you went about calling it simplistic. You could have said, "I wish the ability had more complexity to it" but instead you said, "it's a bad copy of other abilities." See the difference?

I don't think you understand how bad it is.

Another thing to consider is, "what if anything could the OP do to improve, and have I identified that for them in a respectful manner?"

There's nothing to improve if the basic kit makes no sense and has no correlation to her as a champion. Why is it called Void Fire? Why does she have a lightning bolt? Why can she charm people? Because she's a girl? Hello? Why does she make copies of herself? Does any of this make sense for a void support. Having gems by doing damage with your spells, this is fine. You can make the leap in logic that the energy is crystallizing or something, whatever; but when you kit is so simplistic it could give Annie a run for her money on simplest kit you have fucked up, straight and simple.

You didn't provide any new suggestions for directions to take the design in or additions to make to the kit. This is important when commenting on champion design threads.

There is no salvation for this kit because there is nothing there. If there is a semblance that there was some thought about how do these abilities work with each other, what goals do I want her to accomplish, then you could maybe argue that. What do I suggest? Um, maybe don't have a point and click stun that turns into an AOE stun? Like that is actually accomplishing something. Get real.

  • Calling something stupid is a lot less helpful than saying, "I don't think that works because 'X', why don't you try 'Y' instead?"

She has an ability that does damage. Thats all.

Morgana pool does damage over time. Ok simple. BUT SHE HAS OTHER THINGS SHE NEEDS TO DO FOR THE DAMAGE. Morgana is a simple and easy champion but she at least has the bare minimum that says "Hey Morgana has to actually do something for her damage."

You can have simple abilities that aren't dumb. Xin Zhao is a dumb champion, Old Yorick was a dumb champion, but even those champions have an idea that differing abilities need to work together. Not just "Hey I hit you with a spell so get charmed" and that's the cutoff.

  • Calling something unoriginal is a lot less helpful than saying, "That overlaps A's design space, what if it were changed to do <insert cool design idea here> in order to further differentiate it from those designs?"

No. You don't understand anything of what I said.

A. Sol, Anivia, Syndra all have worse versions of her Q.

What do those champions have? A stun. What makes these abilities worse then the Void Sorceress? She can just do a point and click (+AoE) stun. Just like that. No build up. Nothing. Dumb.

W is a Zeus W from Dota 2. That's bad.

Do you understand why comparing to Dota 2 design is bad? Because almost every hero they have is SIMPLISTIC AND DUMB. Zeus just points and clicks at people with spells. We don't play Zeus because "oh yeah, he's a well designed hero". We play Zeus because "I like Karthus ulting twice in a row and instagibbing supports"

R is literally a worse version of Heimerdinger R

What does Heimerdinger do. He upgrades a basic spell, increasing effects and damage. What does Valeria do. Only has increased damage. Any comparison is justified. It isn't a Leblanc ult where you get another cast. Its more damage on the same cooldown.

Calling something bad is not helpful. So you should instead focus on offering suggestions for changes or additions.

I'm sorry I didn't just say a one sentence dismissal of the entire kit, because that is how bad I consider it.

If you want a simple kit you have to work on differentiating itself so it has gameplay. Kayn coming outta the pipeline is simple as hell. Q is a dash. W is an aoe strike. E lets you go through walls. R lets you hop into a champion for a second then damage them. But then you go to the lynch pin of his kit, his passive, and it all makes sense. You have choices. You have gameplay to consider. You aren't a champion that can be copy pasted onto anything, call it a mage, and be done.

HalcyonDweller2 votes

You're still only bashing instead of being constructive. And it's clear from your responses here you haven't bothered to look through the rest of the discussions to see how others are providing feedback and how OP is responding.

The OP has been friendly and open about design decisions and willing to consider suggestions offered by others and answer people's questions.

If you try giving feedback properly like the rest of us you might find that the OP would be open and receptive to your ideas too.

Offer improvement suggestions like, "If you add X to the champion's kit it will do Y to improve their cohesiveness or uniqueness."

Regardless, OP has said it's still a work in progress. They're planning to do more with it. If you had bothered being nice from the start you might have discovered this for yourself.

ThorOdinson544 votes

Rockman may have been harsh, but he has a point. This kit really has nothing that would have me choose Valeria over, say, Syndra. Most champions have something to them that is uniquely theirs, and I don't see that in her. So long as this is a work in progress, I think she needs a different, cooler ult. Now her lore is very good, especially because it adds another element to Malzahar and Kog'maw. I do find it similar to a Void-Ahri though.

ModEchoing4 votes

Hi there, I'm the mean mod.

Don't defend him. As a guy who frequently has to peruse champions that are roughly the same quality while finished as this work in progress, I can still find several paragraphs of constructive criticism that helps bring the creator closer to what they want. HalcyonDweller is correct in his manner of going about things here.

ThorOdinson542 votes

I didn't mean to sound as if I was defending him; saying 'This champ is garbage' when I'm sure Dreamwalker put forth so much effort is, put simply, being a jerk. Despite all the problems he found, I note he couldn't figure out any solutions at all. As HalcyonDweller has said, nothing good comes of telling them that it's a bad champ, especially because it's really pretty good. With all the complicated champions beings released, I found the simplicity in Xayah and Rakan was a relief, not a downfall. Simplicity doesn't mean bad, but Rockman clearly thinks otherwise. I'm just saying Valeria needs something special, the signature ability that makes a champion unique. For example, Kled has Skaarl, which no other champion has anything even close to, and it has made him a very cool champion. Camille has an inescapable area that allows you to murder the ADC every 100 or so seconds. Kayn can choose to become a fighter or assassin. Valeria, however, doesn't have a cool, unique ability like that. Her gems are interesting, but they don't feel the same as a cool ability.

The Dreamwalker2 votes

{quoted}

I don't think you understand how bad it is.

I think the other comments on my posts would beg to differ. I respect your opinion, and I will not be rude about it.

There's nothing to improve if the basic kit makes no sense and has no correlation to her as a champion. Why is it called Void Fire? Why does she have a lightning bolt? Why can she charm people? Because she's a girl? Hello? Why does she make copies of herself? Does any of this make sense for a void support. Having gems by doing damage with your spells, this is fine. You can make the leap in logic that the energy is crystallizing or something, whatever; but when you kit is so simplistic it could give Annie a run for her money on simplest kit you have fucked up, straight and simple.

If you have questions, then ask. I love responding to questions, but don't be rude to Halcyon. You can just ask. First off, if you paid attention to my idea, you would understand that she is voidborn. No, I am not being sexist when I say she can charm people. If that is your conclusion, then what about Rakan? He is male, yet can charm. Nothing is wrong with having another charming female champion. Why do you call her a support? You must have completely missed the Basics sections of my topic. There are several basic kits in the game. No, I did not mess up. I would also appreciate it if you stop commenting on this idea. You are rude, discriminatory, as well as other things. I have no power to stop you from commenting, but I will just ignore your comments. You are also really confusing. You ask why she lighting-like ability, but mention her energy... yea, just gonna stop there.

There is no salvation for this kit because there is nothing there. If there is a semblance that there was some thought about how do these abilities work with each other, what goals do I want her to accomplish, then you could maybe argue that. What do I suggest? Um, maybe don't have a point and click stun that turns into an AOE stun? Like that is actually accomplishing something. Get real.

.> She has substance. She is labeled under Artillery mage. If read the idea, you would notice the stun is a reward from her void gem. Also, it's a skillshot. She has to land it. All of her abilities are skill shots, except her E.

She has an ability that does damage. Thats all.

When you dumb down abilities like that, sure they sound bad. I could dumb down a lot of abilities. No, that is not all, by the way. I just don't feel like arguing with you, again.

Morgana pool does damage over time. Ok simple. BUT SHE HAS OTHER THINGS SHE NEEDS TO DO FOR THE DAMAGE. Morgana is a simple and easy champion but she at least has the bare minimum that says "Hey Morgana has to actually do something for her damage."

So, Morgana is more complex than Valeria? She lands a Q that binds with damage, she pops her W. Done. Valeria has to land her skillshots to do her damage, scary I know. Also, her E doesn't do anything if she land her other abilities. Man, talk about simple mechanics.

You can have simple abilities that aren't dumb. Xin Zhao is a dumb champion, Old Yorick was a dumb champion, but even those champions have an idea that differing abilities need to work together. Not just "Hey I hit you with a spell so get charmed" and that's the cutoff.

What about other champions, dude? Lux lands a Q, E, R for several seasons and wins. At least Valeria also has to press more than one button to make her presence know unlike Miss Fortune and Syndra.

No. You don't understand anything of what I said.

I believe Halcyon understood you 100%. You are one misinterpreting things.

What do those champions have? A stun. What makes these abilities worse then the Void Sorceress? She can just do a point and click (+AoE) stun. Just like that. No build up. Nothing. Dumb.

She is NOT a point and click champion!! She has skillshots dude. She has to land her abilities. I don't know why you complaining. There are several champions that have skillshot shots. Kennen, Anivia, Sol, etc.

Do you understand why comparing to Dota 2 design is bad? Because almost every hero they have is SIMPLISTIC AND DUMB. Zeus just points and clicks at people with spells. We don't play Zeus because "oh yeah, he's a well designed hero". We play Zeus because "I like Karthus ulting twice in a row and instagibbing supports"

You seriously misunderstood my champion. Her abilities are all skillshots.

What does Heimerdinger do. He upgrades a basic spell, increasing effects and damage. What does Valeria do. Only has increased damage. Any comparison is justified. It isn't a Leblanc ult where you get another cast. Its more damage on the same cooldown.

And no, Valeria doesn't just get damage.

Q - Actual crowd control.

W - Zone control.

E - Conditional crowd control

R - Assassinate potential

Her abilities were reworked. That is what the community is for.

I mean, she like other champions. She controls a zone, thus allowing her to land A, then activating B, and hopefully securing her kill with C.

I'm sorry I didn't just say a one sentence dismissal of the entire kit, because that is how bad I consider it.

That is fine if you consider it bad. I don't, and never will.

If you want a simple kit you have to work on differentiating itself so it has gameplay. Kayn coming outta the pipeline is simple as hell. Q is a dash. W is an aoe strike. E lets you go through walls. R lets you hop into a champion for a second then damage them. But then you go to the lynch pin of his kit, his passive, and it all makes sense. You have choices. You have gameplay to consider. You aren't a champion that can be copy pasted onto anything, call it a mage, and be done.

I honestly don't care for your comments anymore. They hold no substance, with someone behind that screen that feels it is fine to tear someone down completely and wholly. I am sick of people like you, quite honestly. Any and all champions can be teared down as easily as you ripped through this idea. I just don't care if you are going to be snarky. When you learn to be kind, then I'll actually hope you comment to my ideas, but from this point forth I am just gonna ignore your comments because they hold nothing but meaningless insults about something I put time into.

HalcyonDweller3 votes

The Q is interesting, but you might want to switch it around somehow, maybe make it chain in the beginning, maybe apply a slow, but not apply a stun until the gem upgrade. This would also help to differentiate it from other abilities that are similar. EDIT: Whoops I never finished that sentence, my b.

Fun fact, Riot uses "Takedowns" to refer to any kills you participate in, regardless of if you kill them or only get an assist.

W is cool, but it might be a little too similar to Veigar's comet. How do you envision the animation working? How much of a windup should it have? Should it provide a warning indicator where it is going to hit? How big of an area would it hit (both before and after the upgrade)? If you wanted to make it more unique you could even make it like she summons a void portal in a target area, and after a delay dark lightning strikes from her to it (damaging enemies in its path). You could even preserve the increased AOE by making the portal or egg explode in a larger area after she upgrades the ability.

E is awesome, however having no cooldown is not good. The player could conceivably use her Q, W, and Ultimate alternating with the E, to repeatedly charm enemies for quite a long duration. Therefore I think it would be better to give it at least some sort of cooldown to prevent the player from simply chaining charms for long cc-locks.

I'm not sure I understand how the ultimate works, could you please help me to understand it better? Where would the clones appear? How would she choose which spell they cast? Would they cast spells at the same time as her or does she get to cast spells through them separately and individually? Do they use up her cooldowns or does she get separate cooldowns for each clone?

The Dreamwalker1 votes

{quoted}

The Q is interesting, but you might want to switch it around somehow, maybe make it chain in the beginning, maybe apply a slow, but not apply a stun until the gem upgrade. This would also help to differentiate it from

I see, that is a good change. I will see about doing that.

Fun fact, Riot uses "Takedowns" to refer to any kills you participate in, regardless of if you kill them or only get an assist.

W is cool, but it might be a little too similar to Veigar's comet. How do you envision the animation working? How much of a windup should it have? Should it provide a warning indicator where it is going to hit? How big of an area would it hit (both before and after the upgrade)? If you wanted to make it more unique you could even make it like she summons a void portal in a target area, and after a delay dark lightning strikes from her to it (damaging enemies in its path). You could even preserve the increased AOE by making the portal or egg explode in a larger area after she upgrades the ability.

Yea, I can the problem. There is an indicator that charges up, then after the charge it strikes down like a black lighting bolt.

Hmm, I have to admit that does sound interesting.

E is awesome, however having no cooldown is not good. The player could conceivably use her Q, W, and Ultimate alternating with the E, to repeatedly charm enemies for quite a long duration. Therefore I think it would be better to give it at least some sort of cooldown to prevent the player from simply chaining charms for long cc-locks.

Ah, I see. I will add something.

I'm not sure I understand how the ultimate works, could you please help me to understand it better? Where would the clones appear? How would she choose which spell they cast? Would they cast spells at the same time as her or does she get to cast spells through them separately and individually? Do they use up her cooldowns or does she get separate cooldowns for each clone?

Okay, yea, I see. Sorry.

So, she summons two clones on either side of her (think E. Lux's dance). They cast the spell you cast right after they are summoned. They cast at the exact same time. They do use her cooldowns. I believe that answers your questions.

P.s. I appreciate you defending me! Really appreciated. Also, it is a simple idea, but I like simple things sometimes. It doesn't always need to be complex. I also noted you said you had some disagreements later in your comments? What were they? I wouldn't mind discussing them.

Edit: After working with your suggestions, I see that her powers now have this feeling of "want". The Q rewards a stun for a void gem, the W rewards a lighting field, the E (I wanna change it) heals you, and the ult rewards you with more damage.

The E... it is really her form of sustain. Unlike other mages, she doesn't rely on a shield or mobility, I thought the heal would set her apart.

HalcyonDweller1 votes

[{quoted}](name=The Dreamwalker,realm=NA,application-id=A8FQeEA8,discussion-id=WW1hFmIt,comment-id=00010000,timestamp=2017-07-10T19:19:03.443+0000)

So, she summons two clones on either side of her (think E. Lux's dance). They cast the spell you cast right after they are summoned. They cast at the exact same time. They do use her cooldowns. I believe that answers your questions.

That does, thank you!

P.s. I appreciate you defending me! Really appreciated. Also, it is a simple idea, but I like simple things sometimes. It doesn't always need to be complex.

Not a problem. I hate it when people take a crap on another person's day without any thought as to the impact their words have.

I also noted you said you had some disagreements later in your comments? What were they? I wouldn't mind discussing them.

Oh not complete disagreements, mostly just the things I asked about or suggested changes to already. I usually find it is easier to show someone understanding while calling them out for boorish behavior, they are more likely to be receptive and people tend to see that I'm just calling it out rather than white-knighting.

My initial reaction to the "friends with Kog'Maw" was a bit averse, but now that I have learned more about void lore I'm not really opposed to it anymore. I am curious though, why Kog'Maw and not one of the other Void Spawn?

Edit: After working with your suggestions, I see that her powers now have this feeling of "want". The Q rewards a stun for a void gem, the W rewards a lighting field, the E (I wanna change it) heals you, and the ult rewards you with more damage.

The E... it is really her form of sustain. Unlike other mages, she doesn't rely on a shield or mobility, I thought the heal would set her apart.

That sounds interesting, how would you change it to implement the heal?

The Dreamwalker1 votes

{quoted}

That does, thank you!

You're quite welcome!

Not a problem. I hate it when people take a crap on another person's day without any thought as to the impact their words have.

Yea, I feel the same.

Oh not complete disagreements, mostly just the things I asked about or suggested changes to already. I usually find it is easier to show someone understanding while calling them out for boorish behavior, they are more likely to be receptive and people tend to see that I'm just calling it out rather than white-knighting.

Ah, I see.

My initial reaction to the "friends with Kog'Maw" was a bit averse, but now that I have learned more about void lore I'm not really opposed to it anymore. I am curious though, why Kog'Maw and not one of the other Void Spawn?

Almost finished with the rough draft of her lore... but it just has to do with what the deal Valeria and Kog'Maw made.

That sounds interesting, how would you change it to implement the heal?

I think, the spell could spellvamp or draw on the energy of her foes to charge her next ability to heal her. Just using the idea of the "energy transferal" idea that you so smartly pointed out.

HalcyonDweller1 votes

[{quoted}](name=The Dreamwalker,realm=NA,application-id=A8FQeEA8,discussion-id=WW1hFmIt,comment-id=0001000000000000,timestamp=2017-07-10T21:40:44.092+0000)

Almost finished with the rough draft of her lore... but it just has to do with what the deal Valeria and Kog'Maw made.

Cool I'll look forwards to seeing that then!

I think, the spell could spellvamp or draw on the energy of her foes to charge her next ability to heal her. Just using the idea of the "energy transferal" idea that you so smartly pointed out.

Nifty :) I'm glad to see I've been helpful. Let me know if you would like to discuss anything more about design or lore!

The Dreamwalker1 votes

{quoted}

Cool I'll look forwards to seeing that then!

Okay, so, I have the rough draft up, if you would like to see that. I am going to continue tweaking it when need be.

Nifty :) I'm glad to see I've been helpful. Let me know if you would like to discuss anything more about design or lore!

Um, hmm, nothing else about this idea, however I would enjoy contacting you again the future if I have another idea. Oh, but you could check out Isabella, the Balanced Blade for fun if you haven't already! Then, we could discuss her if you would like. :)

[slayer-pantheon-popcorn]

Asamas2 votes

Nice... I won't talk about the abilities but about the concept. You know that kassasin and malzahar look like humans becouse they are humans corupted by the void. They were humans born somewhere in Runtera (I don't remember where but I think if not both just one of them is form Shurima). After that they saw the void and got corupted by it. Malzhar went mad and started wanting to help the voidborns escape the void. Kassadin was still good and he wanted to keep the voidborns in the void. He was alone so he had to be everywhere and he became the void walker, the first and only of his kind. If you see all other void bornes (kassadin and malzahar are not voidbonres) you can see that they are all monsters hungry for something. Few examples: Velkoz is hungry for knowledge, Khazix is hungry for power and prey (he wants to adapt), KogMaw Chogath are simply hungry and so on.

But this girl looks like human but its voidborne "Homeland: The Void". This can't happen. She must be corupted like kassadin and malzahar. She isn't a monster but I can't tell if she is hungry for something (don't have lore to read).

The Dreamwalker1 votes

{quoted}

Nice... I won't talk about the abilities but about the concept. You know that kassasin and malzahar look like humans becouse they are humans corupted by the void. They were humans born somewhere in Runtera (I don't remember where but I think if not both just one of them is form Shurima). After that they saw the void and got corupted by it. Malzhar went mad and started wanting to help the voidborns escape the void. Kassadin was still good and he wanted to keep the voidborns in the void. He was alone so he had to be everywhere and he became the void walker, the first and only of his kind. If you see all other void bornes (kassadin and malzahar are not voidbonres) you can see that they are all monsters hungry for something. Few examples: Velkoz is hungry for knowledge, Khazix is hungry for power and prey (he wants to adapt), KogMaw Chogath are simply hungry and so on.

But this girl looks like human but its voidborne "Homeland: The Void". This can't happen. She must be corupted like kassadin and malzahar. She isn't a monster but I can't tell if she is hungry for something (don't have lore to read).

Oh, right my bad. I know that Malzhar and Kassadin were corrupted by the Void. My thing for Valeria in her lore. Malzahar was charmed by something in the void. Valeria was that charming thing. She has a void form inside the void, but in the human world she takes on a female, attractive look in order to seduce and charm her foes. Really, she puts on an illusion. Does that make sense? I hope it fits the lore...

Oh, she would be hungry for lust, by the way.

Edit: She charms them before killing them a taking their power. I add an illusion part with her clone-like ability. I hope this helps.

Asamas1 votes

[{quoted}](name=The Dreamwalker,realm=NA,application-id=A8FQeEA8,discussion-id=WW1hFmIt,comment-id=00020000,timestamp=2017-07-10T19:22:21.700+0000)

Oh, right my bad. I know that Malzhar and Kassadin were corrupted by the Void. My thing for Valeria in her lore. Malzahar was charmed by something in the void. Valeria was that charming thing. She has a void form inside the void, but in the human world she takes on a female, attractive look in order to seduce and charm her foes. Really, she puts on an illusion. Does that make sense? I hope it fits the lore...

Oh, she would be hungry for lust, by the way.

Ah yes, now it makes sense. It is a really interesting idea. And will she has a real void form or will she be just energy taking form of something apealing to the world she is going into. The second would be really cool. I am really looking forward to the lore. I want to see why she is friend with Kog'Maw.

The Dreamwalker1 votes

{quoted}

Ah yes, now it makes sense. It is a really interesting idea. And will she has a real void form or will she be just energy taking form of something apealing to the world she is going into. The second would be really cool. I am really looking forward to the lore. I want to see why she is friend with Kog'Maw.

Phew, good, I am happy to have cleared up the confusion. I think she will remain in her appealing form, just my personal preference.

Oh, it's actually quite fun how those two are related.

Edit: I will be sure to let know when it is finished. It should be uploaded tonight.

HalcyonDweller1 votes

I'm beginning to see a really cool possible theme or MO for her as a champion, take a look at this and let me know what you think:

Her theme could involve consuming magic or energy from the earth and feeding it to the void. This would carry the Void's theme of jealous hunger for all things Runterran, while also bringing a new angle to that.

Her powers could revolve around electricity and lightning (or energy) to an extent... for example, for her Q she could pull energy out of the target hit, and out of nearby enemies.

For her W she could summon the portal and then send a bolt of energy into it (flavor text for how she uses W)...

and for her E, she could do some sort of channel to gather energy to offer to the void in return for healing, so for example she channels for a bit and if she manages to complete it then she gains a heal, or gets increased spell-vamp on her next spell (I like spell vamp better because it requires her to fight and avoids nasty poke+sustain uninteractive laning phase), or some other form of healing.

Other thoughts for the E involve granting her a shield instead of or while channeling (and maybe granting her an effect based on if the shield survives or gets popped), maybe self-silencing while it is in effect (to balance the defensive power it gives), or having some effect apply to enemies who hit her while she is under the ability's effects.

The Dreamwalker1 votes

{quoted}

I'm beginning to see a really cool possible theme or MO for her as a champion, take a look at this and let me know what you think:

Her theme could involve consuming magic or energy from the earth and feeding it to the void. This would carry the Void's theme of jealous hunger for all things Runterran, while also bringing a new angle to that.

Her powers could revolve around electricity and lightning (or energy) to an extent... for example, for her Q she could pull energy out of the target hit, and out of nearby enemies.

For her W she could summon the portal and then send a bolt of energy into it (flavor text for how she uses W)...

and for her E, she could do some sort of channel to gather energy to offer to the void in return for healing, so for example she channels for a bit and if she manages to complete it then she gains a heal, or gets increased spell-vamp on her next spell (I like spell vamp better because it requires her to fight and avoids nasty poke+sustain uninteractive laning phase), or some other form of healing.

Other thoughts for the E involve granting her a shield instead of or while channeling (and maybe granting her an effect based on if the shield survives or gets popped), maybe self-silencing while it is in effect (to balance the defensive power it gives), or having some effect apply to enemies who hit her while she is under the ability's effects.

Theme seems... fitting actually. I kinda like it.

The Q, in a way, pulls our the energy of her foes thus the slow.

The W uses lighting as a weapon. I am not entirely sure what you mean by portal... could you explain a little more?

The E intrigues me a lot. Before I read this, I replied to your other comment about possibly changing it to a spell vamp (great minds think alike xD).

I want a fighter-ish mage that is more aggressive instead of passive. So, the increased spellvamp might something worth doing. Thanks a lot for the suggestions and kind words.

HalcyonDweller1 votes

[{quoted}](name=The Dreamwalker,realm=NA,application-id=A8FQeEA8,discussion-id=WW1hFmIt,comment-id=00030000,timestamp=2017-07-10T21:46:09.347+0000)

Theme seems... fitting actually. I kinda like it.

The Q, in a way, pulls our the energy of her foes thus the slow.

Exactly! Like sucking energy out :D Maybe for animation it could be like a tendril or tentacle shooting away from her (like a skillshot) that would latch onto the first target struck and then suck / scoop energy away after a short delay.

The W uses lighting as a weapon. I am not entirely sure what you mean by portal... could you explain a little more?

Maybe portal isn't the right word. Something like a power conduit to the void, so she can send energy to the other side while on runeterra. Maybe instead of a portal it could be like, a void node... or a lightningrod like effect? I'm not sure what would be best. Did this help you understand the idea better?

The E intrigues me a lot. Before I read this, I replied to your other comment about possibly changing it to a spell vamp (great minds think alike xD).

I want a fighter-ish mage that is more aggressive instead of passive. So, the increased spellvamp might something worth doing. Thanks a lot for the suggestions and kind words.

Happy to help :) I love seeing people's ideas take off and become a fully planned design!

Another thing I think might fit this new thematic (but might be crossing lines that Riot would never be willing to put into design) would be to have one of her abilities drain mana. Maybe the void node on her W, or her E around her during the channel / shield so that the enemies can counterplay by moving away from the zone of mana drain.

The Dreamwalker1 votes

{quoted}

Exactly! Like sucking energy out :D Maybe for animation it could be like a tendril or tentacle shooting away from her (like a skillshot) that would latch onto the first target struck and then suck / scoop energy away after a short delay.

That would be awesome! Maybe not a tentacle because that is Illaoi, but I see what you mean.

Maybe portal isn't the right word. Something like a power conduit to the void, so she can send energy to the other side while on runeterra. Maybe instead of a portal it could be like, a void node... or a lightningrod like effect? I'm not sure what would be best. Did this help you understand the idea better?

Ah, yea, now I do. That sounds cool, I think the improved W upgrade fits that sorta.

Happy to help :) I love seeing people's ideas take off and become a fully planned design!

:D I, as a concept creator, really appreciate people like you. (Even if not everyone is as warm or accepting as I am xD)

Another thing I think might fit this new thematic (but might be crossing lines that Riot would never be willing to put into design) would be to have one of her abilities drain mana. Maybe the void node on her W, or her E around her during the channel / shield so that the enemies can counterplay by moving away from the zone of mana drain.

Yea, mana drain would be fun and new, but I don't really see Riot implementing that anytime soon. (Who knows, we are getting a champion that can sit inside someone for about 2.5 seconds, then deal max. life damage and something for the other form. Mana drain might be on the way)

HalcyonDweller1 votes

[{quoted}](name=The Dreamwalker,realm=NA,application-id=A8FQeEA8,discussion-id=WW1hFmIt,comment-id=0003000000000000,timestamp=2017-07-10T22:16:30.961+0000)

That would be awesome! Maybe not a tentacle because that is Illaoi, but I see what you mean.

Oh shoot, good point! Maybe a lariat or a whip?

Ah, yea, now I do. That sounds cool, I think the improved W upgrade fits that sorta.

:D I, as a concept creator, really appreciate people like you. (Even if not everyone is as warm or accepting as I am xD)

Most people seem to appreciate my current method of providing feedback, I was less helpful in the past and the board moderators helped steer me in the right direction. So far it's worked out pretty well :)

Yea, mana drain would be fun and new, but I don't really see Riot implementing that anytime soon. (Who knows, we are getting a champion that can sit inside someone for about 2.5 seconds, then deal max. life damage and something for the other form. Mana drain might be on the way)

Yeah maybe :) That's why I suggested a drain, something slow that could be avoided with proper counterplay. It would be most useful in a teamfight where enemies might be distracted and not get away from it promptly, and less useful in 1 on 1 fights. Providing plenty of counterplay is the only way I could envision Riot allowing something like that into the game.

ThorOdinson541 votes

In a separate comment, I said that Valeria needed a better ult because her current one isn't anything too special. I came up with a suggestion for what I think would be a cool ult that fits thematically.

R: Geminae Animarum (Kept the name)

Range: ~1000

Mana: 100

Valeria designates a target champion and disappears, becoming untargetable for one second. During this second, she chooses one side of the opponent: top, left, bottom, or right, based on cursor location. After the one second is up, four versions of Valeria appear on the four sides of the opponent, each ~600 units away. The real Valeria is placed on the side designated earlier, and the other three sides are occupied by clones. Valeria and the clones then channel an empowered attack over (1.5 / 1.25 / 1) second(s). During the channel, the opponent may auto attack the four Valerias. If they hit the real Valeria, the channel is interrupted. If they hit a clone, it flickers and otherwise has no effect. After the channel, they unleash a massive laser from above the opponent (cannot be dodged) dealing [150/300/450 + 100% AP] magic damage to the opponent and in a small AoE around them. Only the targeted champion can interrupt Valeria's channel with auto attacks, any nearby allies must use hard CC.

Cooldown: 150/120/90

This ability would definitely be cooler (maybe not statistically better) than her current ult. It has fair counterplay for the target, while Valeria can play some mind games with them. They need to guess 'Where did Valeria go?' and attack that clone. They only have time for one or maybe two auto attacks before she hits them, so they need to guess right. Plus, when she appears around them, there's an opportunity for a nice one-liner quote. In her lore, she seems to trick her victims, and this allows you to trick your enemy.

I hope you like this ability, feel free to use it if you do.

The Dreamwalker1 votes

{quoted}

In a separate comment, I said that Valeria needed a better ult because her current one isn't anything too special. I came up with a suggestion for what I think would be a cool ult that fits thematically.

I actually didn't get that comment.

R: Geminae Animarum (Kept the name)

Yay xD The meaning still works with this idea. Geminae Animarum means "twin souls".

Range: ~1000

Ah, I think 1000 range for something that is unavoidable / untargetable is a little OP.

Mana: 100

Valeria designates a target champion and disappears, becoming untargetable for one second. During this second, she chooses one side of the opponent: top, left, bottom, or right, based on cursor location. After the one second is up, four versions of Valeria appear on the four sides of the opponent, each ~600 units away. The real Valeria is placed on the side designated earlier, and the other three sides are occupied by clones. Valeria and the clones then channel an empowered attack over (1.5 / 1.25 / 1) second(s). During the channel, the opponent may auto attack the four Valerias. If they hit the real Valeria, the channel is interrupted. If they hit a clone, it flickers and otherwise has no effect. After the channel, they unleash a massive laser from above the opponent (cannot be dodged) dealing [150/300/450 + 100% AP] magic damage to the opponent and in a small AoE around them. Only the targeted champion can interrupt Valeria's channel with auto attacks, any nearby allies must use hard CC.

I like the idea. I would make a few minor tweaks, however it is good.

Cooldown: 150/120/90

This ability would definitely be cooler (maybe not statistically better) than her current ult. It has fair counterplay for the target, while Valeria can play some mind games with them. They need to guess 'Where did Valeria go?' and attack that clone. They only have time for one or maybe two auto attacks before she hits them, so they need to guess right. Plus, when she appears around them, there's an opportunity for a nice one-liner quote. In her lore, she seems to trick her victims, and this allows you to trick your enemy.

I hope you like this ability, feel free to use it if you do.

I will give credit.

ThorOdinson541 votes

Glad you like it, and thanks for giving credit.

FloRaider421 votes

Guess who is back for a temporary visit? Seems like you were rather busy, so let's get going:

Basics: Her name doesn't sound like it originates from the Void and more like a normal human name.

Considering she supossedly is a Voidborn I wonder why she has no grander title? Maw, Reaper, Eye, Terror and Burrower sound a lot more descriptive and aweinspiring than a simple "Sorceress".

Her appearence really doesn't look like a Voidborn and "It's actually an illusion" would sound less like a Handwave if we ever saw her full form. Considering the premise I feel like her real form could be a Voidborn Anglerfish where the female body, would be simple bait used. It doesn't even need to change that much, but show that she isn't really human.

Lore:

Classic Succubus thematics, but really well written and interesting.

Abilities:

P: Similiar to Kha'Zix Ult passive combined with Threshs passive, but nonetheless interesting as it does differ enough IMHO. Only gripe is that it has no real connection with her lore or thematics IMHO.

Q: Overall basic ability, but combined with her passive that doesn't matter as much as it makes a nice difference between empowered and normal ability. I wonder why it has such a simple name, but even more why a "Fire" has a "lighting" effect. Slight odditity is that the empowered form adds both AOE and CC which seems weird at first. Seems to lack any real ties with her thematics though.

W: I feel like the comparison with Veigar W seems fair as they don't differ much. The addition of an AOE Dot is interesting and synegizes well with the stun and charm. Again slight trouble connecting temptress with lighting powers...

E: A 5 second CD 1 second charm with 850 range seems rather powerfull, unless I am missing something, especially since the criteria easily gets remedied with empowered Q. The spellvamp synergizes nicely with Q AOE and W nuke. Overall the best fitting ability in regards to her lore.

R: The name is really an odd one out and should fit her other abilities. 1.5 seconds seems like a short duration if the clones have life-bars, since otherwise you need up to 4 hard CC, unless they take increased damage or are easily distinguished. 45 seconds CD Ult seems really bizarre, considering the power. What happens when you walk away from that area? Shows her illusion ability and trickery, which makes it a good thematic fit. Honestly like the original draft slightly better. Kudos to ThorOdinson54

Overall:

Thematically her abilities seem good (passive shows hunger, E tempress and R trickery), but definetly has room for improvement. Gameplaywise howerver I don't see that much appeal in picking her over other champions, mainly due to QWE being more along the lines of simplish burst mages, with only R and P making her more interesting as a pick. In conclusion, rather well made designwise as there aren't any real problems regarding theme or abilities. That said she could use changes that set her apart more easily and create an overarching thematic with her abilities.

FloRaider out summoner 31

The Dreamwalker1 votes

{quoted}

Guess who is back for a temporary visit? Seems like you were rather busy, so let's get going:

Basics: Her name doesn't sound like it originates from the Void and more like a normal human name.

Well, to me, it sorta helps her. Valeria seems more appealing to her enchanted subjects than something else. Also, like her appearance, it could a part of her that she changed in order to seduce people more easily.

Considering she supossedly is a Voidborn I wonder why she has no grander title? Maw, Reaper, Eye, Terror and Burrower sound a lot more descriptive and aweinspiring than a simple "Sorceress".

The idea is a WIP. Mainly just a placeholder. Since I cannot change the name once votes are placed on it, it going to have to stay. But, for the sake of her theme and such, she was going to be changed to Valeria, the Abyssal Heart. The Void, as far as I know, contains of the theme of an abyss and the heart since common times connect a heart to love. Therefore, connecting those two things make her theme a little bit more clear.

Her appearence really doesn't look like a Voidborn and "It's actually an illusion" would sound less like a Handwave if we ever saw her full form.

I don't quite understand this.

Considering the premise I feel like her real form could be a Voidborn Anglerfish where the female body, would be simple bait used. It doesn't even need to change that much, but show that she isn't really human.

So, a Siren? But, yea I understand that.

Lore:

Classic Succubus thematics, but really well written and interesting.

Abilities:

P: Similiar to Kha'Zix Ult passive combined with Threshs passive, but nonetheless interesting as it does differ enough IMHO. Only gripe is that it has no real connection with her lore or thematics IMHO.

I wrote in the lore that she "absorbs her prey's spark" or something like that in order to "fill her hunger". That is the connect between her theme and such.

Q: Overall basic ability, but combined with her passive that doesn't matter as much as it makes a nice difference between empowered and normal ability. I wonder why it has such a simple name, but even more why a "Fire" has a "lighting" effect. Slight odditity is that the empowered form adds both AOE and CC which seems weird at first. Seems to lack any real ties with her thematics though.

I never replaced the name from her old version of this power.

W: I feel like the comparison with Veigar W seems fair as they don't differ much. The addition of an AOE Dot is interesting and synegizes well with the stun and charm. Again slight trouble connecting temptress with lighting powers...

Temptresses / Succubuses absorb their preys energy in order to fuel their own power. The energy is, for lack of words, the energy or lifeforces of her prey that she has killed and absorbed.

E: A 5 second CD 1 second charm with 850 range seems rather powerfull, unless I am missing something, especially since the criteria easily gets remedied with empowered Q. The spellvamp synergizes nicely with Q AOE and W nuke. Overall the best fitting ability in regards to her lore.

Well, first of all, thank you. Hopefully I can explain. The E lures a prey to her, pretty simple. Then, she kills them and absorbs their spark, aka passive, to fuel her other abilities. The spark she takes is representative of her other powers since is all about taking someone's lifeforce to fuel for her powers. Don't know if that makes sense, but the underlined thing here is that it isn't lighting (forgot to change the names as stated before).

R: The name is really an odd one out and should fit her other abilities. 1.5 seconds seems like a short duration if the clones have life-bars, since otherwise you need up to 4 hard CC, unless they take increased damage or are easily distinguished. 45 seconds CD Ult seems really bizarre, considering the power.

LeBlanc only has a 49 second ult at level 1, then about 15 seconds at level 3. The mimic is 159 seconds. Also, there are aoe cc in the game. Such as Alistair, Galio, Soraka, etc.

What happens when you walk away from that area? Shows her illusion ability and trickery, which makes it a good thematic fit. Honestly like the original draft slightly better. Kudos to ThorOdinson54

That is an okay opinion, but I just felt there were blanks in the OP's draft, and knowing myself, I would never just take something and just completely use it.

Overall:

Thematically her abilities seem good (passive shows hunger, E tempress and R trickery), but definetly has room for improvement. Gameplaywise howerver I don't see that much appeal in picking her over other champions, mainly due to QWE being more along the lines of simplish burst mages, with only R and P making her more interesting as a pick. In conclusion, rather well made designwise as there aren't any real problems regarding theme or abilities. That said she could use changes that set her apart more easily and create an overarching thematic with her abilities.

FloRaider out summoner 31

FloRaider421 votes

it could a part of her that she changed in order to seduce people more easily.

I think it would make sense for her champion name to be her true voidborn name. She would be using different names depending on who she wants to seduce, since I doubt that everyone likes a name like Valeria.

I don't quite understand this.

Having a character use an illusion is fine, but it's weird for the illusion not to break upon death or when she needs to put all her energy into fighting. It's also weird for such a big part of her character to have no impact on her kit (think Tricksters Glass).

That is the connect between her theme and such.

Problem is that Kha specifically is all about evolving and EVERY voidborn consumes something, but almost none evolve, so there is no solid reasoning why she can evolve her abilities.

lifeforce to fuel for her powers

I personally feel like this is a weak connection to the theme (wouldn't be that glaring if this was the only ability like that), since you could use that to handwave any type of ability. I know it's hard for every ability to fit the main theme, but I think it would be worth it.

LeBlanc only has a 49 second ult at level 1, then about 15 seconds at level 3. The mimic is 159 seconds. Also, there are aoe cc in the game. Such as Alistair, Galio, Soraka, etc.

It's less about the CD, but the drastic changes of leveling it up (cutting 45 seconds). I think LB is 54 / 42 / 30 (without CDR). Pick X to counter ability is not counterplay in my opinion, but since you never specified where the clones appear and what they do when you move I thought there would be more range between them, which could be why I feel it's too hard to end the effect.

FloRaider out summoner 31

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