Screw it, short-and-to-the-point patch notes issues

I'm tired of this moronic meta and I'm tired of looking at patch notes and putting my head in my palms.

So fuck it. I'm just going to start making short-'n-sweet bitch-'n-moan bullet points on these. Let's go.

• Akali rework: no tower buffs to go along with this, so have fun dying under turrets, guys.

• Fiddlesticks nerfs: Wrong "nerf". It's the fact you can't mitigate his E damage by smart positioning as it prioritizes bouncing to unhit targets that makes him frustrating (I.E., he bounces it off minions and then it bounces to you, keeping him out of range of retaliation).

• Fizz buffs: some day you're going to actually have to address that he either abuses his opponent with oppressive all-in range or gets cucked.

• Irelia changes(?): Sure.

• Kindred nerfs: Really? Just the bugfixes put her ahead? Not the several buffs as well before bothering to bugfix her? Nice two-patch delay on that response to that by the way.

• Lee Sin change-buffs-nerfs (?): ... presumably he'll suck more before buying any items and be more obnoxious after them. Cool I guess.

• Morgana nerfs: Acknowledging that mid Morgana is cucked by mana costs and then fucking her mana some more to hit her support role. Which affects her mid role. Directly. Which locks her more into support. Okay.

• Olaf buffs: attack speed increase improves his dueling potential, making him better at invading now. Fun.

• Quinn nerfs: my dead hamster would respond faster with nerfs. And he's dead. And a hamster.

• Syndra buffs: see the previous statement but change "nerfs" to "buffs".

• Thresh buffs: ... Eh, a'ight.

• Support items initial gold increase: Fiddlesticks having a nerf to his poke. Then you say that a lot of trading was mitigated through potions so you nerf the ability to start potions. Meaning Fiddlesticks is going to effectively do more poke damage than before because more of it stays. I'll let that settle in.

• Infinity Edge changes: remove the fucking true damage already.

• Stormrazor changes: one of few items meant for marksmen that can be bastardized by AD assassins for an early lead. Cheaper buy makes it more palatable for them as well.

• Essence Reaver buff: something something 5 damage.

• Zeal items gold cost reduced: awesome, and now we're right back to square one with crit ADC's this season. Maybe that's robbing too much credit but at this point... fuck it.

• Mercurial Scimitar overall-nerf: doesn't fix that this item is usually full-built later and usually only ever makes it to quicksilver sash. So... nice job accomplishing not-a-lot.

• Monster Hunter changes: so jungle becomes even more impactful than before as most junglers don't top the minion score list. Nice.

• Perfect Timing rune nerf: Just make it 9 minutes. Better yet, fix some of this fucking damage creep that's so rampant across the board so that this fucking item isn't even necessary to have anymore for mid-game to later-game mages to even make it past laning.

Like.... fucking hell, guys. It's just... not fun. It's not fun. It's stressful and stupid The game has passed from "ladele ladelay oh what a wonderful time" to "oh mother fucking fuck my laner took two steps outside of their turret now top has TP'd bot and jungle is going in to destroy botlane dear god why". It's a hellhole of "action" that's less in the form of "balanced play-making" and more in the form of "FUCKING SMASH THEIR SKULLS IN. DAMAGE, BABY, DAMAGE. BLOW THEM UP, AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA!"

I should not, as jungler, have the ability to have 8 kills before laning ends at 10 minutes. And I have done that before and had that happen against me before.

That is dumb.

Just... just whatever. If Riot's really following a policy of changing the game because "fuck it why not", then next season should see a return to teamfighting and prolonged fights, right? Because that would be the most drastic change possible from "nuke them in .5 seconds or lose".

Just being hopeful here. I guess.