Saltiest Nasus Counter Guide Ever

Alright dicks, let's get something straight. I'm not a Nasus main. In fact, I haven't played a single game with the champion in almost a year, but in this guide, I'll teach you how to win against an enemy Nasus (hopefully) every time.

Okay, here goes. Step 1, if you're laning against an enemy Nasus, the first thing you should do is cry. Accept the fact that you lost your lane in champ select and that there is nothing short of divine intervention by the hand of God that will change this fact, so stop trying.

Even if you first blood and take his tower by 4 minutes, you still lose your lane because Nasus doesn't stop laning. Nasus never stops laning. For a Nasus, laning phase ends when a Nexus is dead.

Nasus is a split pushing, full tank hypercarry who will 1v2 and probably 1v3 you by 20 minutes into the game. If you want to stop his rampage, you better send a lot of assholes to deal with him.

"He's a melee damage dealer, I can 1v1 him with Vayne or an Ashe easy" WRONG AGAIN, DICKHEAD

Nasus has a slow. How stupid of a slow, you might ask? It's a 99% slow for 5 seconds.

"But it scales and doesn't hit 99% until right at the 5 second mark!"

I'm sorry. That Nasus who just got into AA range doesn't appear as though he gives a shit. Enjoy that empowered auto for 3/4 of your health, asshole.

If you're a top laner and you're laning against a Nasus, this is how you win: Get a few levels, once he becomes a kill threat (which is always sooner than you think it is) leave lane.

Yes.

Leave.

Don't come back.

Go shove mid and force the jungler to have to come deal with you. If you kill the jungler and the mid laner, take their tower. Get inside of that Nasus' head. If Nasus gets scared and comes to help out his team BOOM, you just won, son. A bad Nasus player won't realize that he is worthless in a teamfight beyond his Wither and can be peeled from any target with relative ease should he get funny and think that his big, furry, stupid doggo ass can flash behind your front line and get away with it.

If the Nasus stays on his goal, he'll probably take a tower by this point and just be farming into oblivion. But here's the real tip against Nasus. If you don't allow him to use his million and five stacks on you, then his farm isn't really that meaningful Yeah, he'll shred towers, but that's only past the 25 minute mark and, as we've established, you should already have an inhibitor by that point.

Make the game a 4v5 because the Nasus doesn't give a shit. All Nasus wants is more farm. More. More. More.

The idea is that you press the 4v5 advantage for as absolutely long as you can, only stopping to push the Nasus off from taking towers on occasion. If you're giving the Nasus an easy time, make the lives of his teammates absolute hell. Camp. Roam. Gank. Make them as salty and tilted as you absolutely can.

But you better do it fast...

If they can hold off your 4v5 or god help you, WIN a 4v5, then it's pretty much game over. Nasus is only effective when the rest of his team can provide lane pressure as well. If they're losing badly, then it makes his job a thousand times harder since he'll have your whole team on his dick every time you leave their vision.

When his team can kill yours and pressure lanes in a 4v5 situation, then it's absolutely over. You can't stop to deal with the Nasus because your other lanes are getting pushed down. You can't stop to deal with the other lanes because Nasus is slowly pushing his giant, thick, weighty, black staff into your base. And you're especially boned if he decides to his lanky-eared ass into your next teamfight and say "hello" and then quickly "goodbye" to whatever frontline you thought you had.

In the end, the key to beating a team with a Nasus is much like beating a team with any kind of hypercarry who starts snowballing from early in the game: beat his ass before he becomes unlocked. Pound it. Make it black and blue. The enemy team should be wishing cancer on each other by the 15 minute mark and be question pinging every death until it stops being funny.

"But our team comp is designed more for the late game with little early pressure..."

Lol, sorry.