Because Played Ranked is Nothing Short of a Horror Game

Hello, hello? Uh, I wanted to record a message for you to help you get settled in on your first match of your promo series. Um, I actually played in that series before you. I'm finishing up my last game now, as a matter of fact. So, I know it can be a bit overwhelming, but I'm here to tell you there's nothing to worry about. Uh, you'll do fine. So, let's just focus on getting you through your first game. Okay? Uh, let's see, first there's an introductory greeting from the company that I'm supposed to read. Uh, it's kind of a legal thing, you know. Um, "Welcome to League of Legends. A magical place for kids and grown-ups acting like kids alike, where fantasy and frustration come to life. Riot Games is not responsible for damage to brain cells. Upon discovering that brain cell death has occurred, a Lyte Smite report will be filed within 90 days, or as soon as the chat log has been thoroughly ignored, and the people AFKing are left unpunished"

Blah blah blah, now that might sound bad, I know, but there's really nothing to worry about. Uh, the players here do get a bit quirky, but do I blame them? No. If I were forced to play through those same stupid games for twenty games and I never got a win? I'd probably be a bit irritable too. So, remember, these players hold a special place in the hearts of Rioters and we need to show them a little respect, right? Okay.

So, just be aware, the players do tend to AFK a bit. Uh, they're left in some kind of free raging mode. Uh...Something about their ELO up if they win games for too long. Uh, they used to be punished by the Tribunal, too. But then there was actual consequences. Yeah. I-It's amazing that they can play Ranked while recognized by Riot as toxic, you know?

Uh, now concerning your ELO, the only real risk to you as a player here, if any, is the fact that these players, uh, if they happen to see you are in promos probably won't recognize you as an ally. They'll p-most likely see you as a player that is worse than them and holding them back. Now since that's against the rules here at lower ELO, they'll probably try to...forcefully ruin your series. Um, now, that wouldn't be so bad if the series themselves didn't force you to win an arbitrarily chosen amount of games, especially around the Tier I divional area. So, you could imagine how having your game being forcefully ruined inside one of those could cause a bit of discomfort...and rage. Uh, the only parts of you that would likely see the light of day again would be your username and the champion you choose when they pop up in the client, since they're the only things that won't be muted, heh.

Y-Yeah, they don't tell you these things when you sign up. But hey, first game should be a breeze. I'll chat with you after. Uh, check that minimap, and remember to dodge only if absolutely necessary. Gotta conserve League Points. Alright, good luck."