PSA to Kalista players: My hatred for you is without limit.

http://www.leaguesplash.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/Veigar-Classic.jpg Figure 1. Not pictured: a fearsome projectile weapon. (Books for scale.)

If I'm playing Support Veigar, and you bind me, consider this post public notice that I will use your stupid ult only to launch myself away from the teamfight.

It is infuriating to be carefully managing distance with the enemy team, and finally getting into position for a good stun, when BAM! Some moron decides to press "R" and turn my screen gray, because they think it's a good time to throw Veigar into the enemy team. I'll admit: I panicked and just smashed buttons in response, which resulted in me getting massacred several times. I can't imagine I'm the only one.

I had the misfortune of playing my first match with an "allied" Kalista this past weekend. I was initially really confused when I saw that soul-binding tether between my Champion and Kalista. Did she do that with all Champions, I wondered? Surely it wasn't that I had her passive on me, I thought, because I distinctly remembered that the way it was supposed to work was she threw her spear down and you could then click on it to accept. (Isn't that the whole idea with her, storywise?) I said some very unkind things about Riot when I realized that she'd already bound poor little Veigar.

hi veigar Who the hell are you? im kallista kalista* from shado ilses Never heard of you. im new lookin 4 friends at institute everyone seems super nice …why are you looking at me like that? u want vengence? Ye— WAIT. I have heard about you. No! Go away! k we frends now No! I said no! I sa— AARARRGGGHGHHHHH! lol now i help u take vengnce with ult What does that mean? I move faster? Get a shield? Do more damage? no i throw u at the other team and u knock them up WHAT? remember 2 peel for me So at last it has come to this. Transformed into a lackluster Braum ult in the hands of an imbecile ADC. My life is torment. sigh no wards hey cutie Oh, hello.

I mean, I'm glad that the Shadow Isles are finally getting a real ADC, but does it have to be her? For one thing, it's going to look super awkward when Thresh tries to kill himself by jumping on a spear. There should be a special interaction where he tries to jump on it, it slides harmlessly between his ribs, and then he awkwardly picks it up and smashes himself with the shaft.