playing for three years and probably the worst player ever

Been playing for three years and im trash. I love playing rank. I was gold 1, now almost gold 5 and dropping heavily. Im not even sure if i suck or what, but the loss streak is very real. Im bored so league is life, cause no life. I wanna play rank not norms. Its just im always losing, always. I wanna climb but i just cant. I need voaching but i have no money like at all. I need help babdly, its the worst. Makes me mad, and even depress. I know it sounds crazy. Im a totally noob, three years seems like it has done nothing for me. Watching sreeams for so long now... nothing helps. Please! Someone help this noob.