Bard: Rant and Joke Skin
So first, the rant. I think it is a little funny, which is what I'm going for really, but if you want to skip to the joke skin idea, scroll down.
I love Bard, ... well, at least I want to love Bard. It is actually quite fun to be a roaming support. You can honestly have a great impact on the game, ... if you don't fall for the trap.
What trap you ask? These, stupid, little, chimes, that, pop, up, everywhere!!! And you have to have them. .. You have to have them all!! ..... or at least I do ... I hate it. I mean it's fun, but I feel like it really takes me out of the game. It's really a distraction. No matter what role I'm playing, I find myself roaming to the point of no longer being involved in the match. And I know it is going to happen. I always tell myself at the start of the game, ... "I am going to stay in lane." Then about 1 minute into the game, the first two spawn, ... "I'll just grab these. I can easily make it back to lane before minions." I lane for a while, ignoring the chimes unless they are immediately in lane. Then after a while we either force the enemy back, or I have a chance to back, ...
While recalling, .. I AM ALREADY PLANNING MY ROUTE BACK TO GRAB AS MANY AS i CAN!
Now, this is actually a good thing. I can get back to lane faster and I pick up some exp, and they honestly do help
BUT THIS IS THE TRAP
Now I feel the power!
I got that rush of zooming around the map.
I am aware of the chimes, and I need them. ...
Maybe, MAYBE, I will go back to lane and let them stack up for a while, but eventually, ...
"There are too many, I'll just go get these over here"
"Good. .. but if I go get those I can zoom in and gank this lane"
"And if I swing back by these, I can drop a health shrine in that lane"
"Okay, now I have enough gold to back and buy this item"
"Sweet, new item! 
Oh, now there are more over here."
"Oh wait, .. my allies are at the enemy nexus?!?!"
GAME OVER
Okay okay, I'm exaggerating a tiny bit, but you see what I mean. It's a freaking trap, and I fall for it EVERY TIME!
Tell me, is there a way to avoid this other than pure self control? When should I actually worry about chimes, and when is it best to just ignore them completely? Is it ever a good idea to NEVER get chimes?
(Also, I want to be clear that most of the time I am only playing him in bot games just for the fun of it, so ultimately it is okay for me to pretty much completely abandon my team since ... it's bots. I'm not so much of an ass to even try taking him into a PVP game in fear of letting the trap take me.)
*Alright, so that was my rant. Now the skin
FAT KID BARD I'm picturing Fat Kid Bard as a big redhead boy in bright colored suspenders and a helicopter cap.
CHIMES Candy bars randomly appear about the map.
MEEPS Nerds candy
HEALTH SHRINES An ice cream cone slowly fills with a spiral of soft-serve ice cream. When it is full, it is topped with sprinkles and a cherry.
ULTIMATE All units and structures placed in stasis are candy striped.
Alright, so I know riot wouldn't, ... or actually, probably couldn't make this skin. I just thought about this because my previous rant reminded me of the feeling that Bard is always distracted by chimes like a fat kid in a candy store. ... so I ran with it.
I really do want advice on how to avoid this trap
