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[Champion Concept] Onyx Razz - The Wielder of The Ashbone

regonas··10 votes·1,893 views
tinypic photo

Based on The First Ashbone Wielder.

Table of content:

  1. Kit
  2. Lore
  3. Quotes
  4. Extra info

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~~ ~~

#1. KIT

........................................................................................................................ Passive The Ashbone Your maximum health is increased by 30%. While you are above 50% of your maximum health, you lose 1% of your maximum health every 3 sec. Killing an enemy minion (15%), neutral jungle monster (25%), epic jungle monster (50%) or enemy champion (100%) have chance to summon an Ash Spark in the location your victim was. These sparks are used for your other abilities and each spark lasts for 20 seconds. ........................................................................................................................ ~~ ~~ ........................................................................................................................ Q Hellish Fist Charge a short distance hitting every enemy in your path dealing 100/130/160/190/220 (+7% of your maximum health) physical damage to them and knock them back.

If you knock an enemy champion into one of your Ash Sparks, then it will explode dealing 30/50/70/90/110 (+5% of your maximum health) physical damage to nearby enemies and stun them for 1 sec.

If you knock an enemy champion into your Silent Rain, then that champion become rooted in place for 2 sec.

If you knock an enemy champion into your Miasma Path, then that champion get his/her movement speed reduced by 80% for 3 sec.

Charge range: 350 Minimum knock back distance (at the end of the charge): 200 Maximum knock back distance (at the start of the charge): 350 Range form the spark to cause explosion: 100 Cooldown: 8 sec Mana cost: 35 ........................................................................................................................ ~~ ~~ ........................................................................................................................ W Silent Rain Target an area and cause ash to fall in that area for 5 sec. Consume all Ash Sparks in targeted area causing radius of this ability to be increased by 40% per spark consumed. Enemies in this area suffers 20/30/40/50/60 (+2% of your maximum health) magic damage every sec.

This ability can not be placed in your Miasma Path.

Range: 700 Radius: 200 Cooldown: 12 sec Mana cost: 45 ........................................................................................................................ ~~ ~~ ........................................................................................................................ E Miasma Path Charge a distance leaving miasma in your path (ignore unit collision while charging) for 4 sec. Enemies in this path takes 10/15/20/25/30 (+1% of your maximum health) magic damage every sec and get their movement speed reduced by 40% for 1 sec.

If you encounter an Ash Spark in your charge path, then perform an AOE attack around yourself dealing 50/80/110/140/170 (+2% of your maximum health) true damage to nearby enemies.

If you charge into your Silent Rain, then you instantly stop and perform a cleaving attack in front of yourself dealing 40/60/80/100/120 (+3% of your maximum health) physical damage.

Range: 600 Width: 300 AOE attack from spark radius: 300 AOE cleave range from Silent Rain: 400 Angle of cleave attack: 120 degree Cooldown: 15 sec Mana cost: 55 ........................................................................................................................ ~~ ~~ ........................................................................................................................ R Ash Twisters Active: summon two randomly moving twisters in front of you. Each twister deals 30/40/50 (+1% of your maximum health) physical damage to enemies inside of it every 0.5 sec.

First time enemies are hit by one of your twisters (10 sec cooldown), they are knocked back a short distance.

Twisters do not have limited duration, but instead have limited movement distance. When they reach maximum distance moved, they will disappear. However, each twister moves randomly.

Passive: increase your armor and magic resist by 20/30/40 (+1 per 100 bonus health).

Maximum twister's movement path: 800 Average movement speed of twister: 500 Radius on one twister: 100 Knock back distance: 100 Cooldown: 1 sec Number of charges: 3 Recharge time of one charge: 30/25/20 sec Mana cost: 75 ........................................................................................................................

~~ ~~

#2. LORE

The Ashbone One of three demonblades known to history, The Ashbones was forget out of dragon's flesh, demon's blood and great amount of lead. It was made so long ago, that no one really knows how or why it was made. Still, its powers are known by some. It burns everything it touches, leaving only ashes behind. However, it doesn't burn with flames or heat, it burns with concentrated evil. This sword erodes happiness, joy, will to live and everything else, it leaves only ashes behind. Even the person who is holding it ins't immune erosion. However, if wielder contains only evil in his mind and heart, then erosion will be very slow, yet still very painful. Pain, fear, hate and all other negative emotions fuel this blade, making it stronger, giving it twisted will of its own. After hundreds of years, countless victims, countless ruined lives, The Ashbone had will and mind, which was able to overtake mind of its wielder. No one was immune to its powers, no one could resist will of this blade. Simple touch was driving people mad, erode their limbs and send them into eternal nightmare. However, if worthy wielder takes it into his hands, then this demonblade even changes form based on what suits the wielder best. It can become long and pointy, at can short and sharp. It changes into form, which fits his master best, while still trying to corrupt mind and body of his master until nothing, but ashes, is left.

Onyx Razz Completely insane delusional sociopath, who was driven crazy while he was tortured by bush of bandits and by The Ashbone. His home was raided by bunch of bandits, who were looking for money and food. His parents were killed in front of his eyes, while he and his sister were raped repeatedly. After these cruel tortures he and his sister were tied together and tossed into a river. His sister drowned, but he did not. Onyx and his sister's body were washed away in a shore of nearby lake. When he regained consciousness, he was still hard-tied to his dead sister. He couldn't break free, he was strawing and cold. After a day, the only thing he could have done to break free was to chew his sister as source of food and to make more room for him to move. And he did it. When Onyx broke free, he ran into the woods, hunted animals and lived there as a wild man for nearly ten years. By some twist of fate, he found abandoned shrine. There The Ashbone was buried and calmly waited for its next wielder. When Onyx took the blade into his hands, old memories, old feelings of what he felt the night when his parents were killed, evetyhing negative buried in his mind reemerged with twisted words of the blade.

Ashbone: do you remember them? Look, look inside of your memories. Remember their scent. You did learn their scent from up-close. Let me show you, what was done to you back then. Let me remind you, what you have suffered. All these things, all these horrors. You can't escape form them, you can't forget them, you can't separate them from you. Dwell back into those moments of your life. Onyx: noo, i don't want to! Don't make... me! Noooo! Not again!! Ashbone: yes, remember all of it. Murder, torture, river and your sister.

Bringer of Ashes After being reminded over and over, seeing again and again what was done to him, Onyx lost all shreds of sanity and become a gruesome monster. Driven by the pain, rage and demonblade's will, he ventured back into humanity with one goal in mind - slaughter. He found all remaining bandits, who killed his parent and tossed him into the river, and killed them with cold blood. Onyx bathed in their blood and flesh. However, that didn't stop him. Evil doesn't stop, it never stops. From place to place, he moved and killed people. Everyone who reminded him of those bandits. Everyone in his way was either threaten, hurt or killed. Everywhere he went, he left trail of blood and ashes. His newest target come Bilgwater's pirates. He maned get into ship and traveled there, fought everyone in his sight. He killed many innocent people, nearly everyone who fought his were killed. He finally was stopped when nearby ship launched several cannon balls at him. Onyx was blown into the ocean, but he didn't die. He was washed away back into Valoran's shores and when he wake up, he stood again and continued on his killing spree.

[side-stories]

Haunted Forest The forest where Onyx lived for nearly ten years was actually haunted, and pretty heavily. Many unholy rituals took place long ago in that location, many people were sacrificed. Some people were killed for ancient gods, other for the void. All negative energy, all aura of death remained in this location, similarly like in the Shadow Isles. However, negative energy and ghost weren't as strong and they weren't able to leave the forest. For that purpose, after second rune war, people build there shrine to contain demonblade, because they weren't able to destroy it. The Ashbone was simply too strong to be destroyed, so the only logical solution was to seal it. Builder were sure that ghost will scare away curious people and demonblade is safely sealed there. However, as time go by, shrine become to break apart and any visitors could take the demonblade with them.

First True Wielder It was man, who was brought out back out of underworld. Master swordsman who was a cruel serial killed. While he was alive, was on a killing spree, killing all other swordsmen and trying to prove his the best one in the world. However, he was captured and executed for his crimes. Some time after that, he was resurrected to wield The Ashbone for his new masters. Combination of an undead and a demonblade proved to be most effective, killing people right and left. Seemingly without weaknesses, he was strong enough to take anybody out, but even he was finally stopped. He was banished, sent into other dimension, another time. Only the demonblade was left behind.

#3. QUOTES

Upon Selection -- Slaughter is the only salvation for them and for me.

Attacking -- Your head will roll. -- I will splatter your guts. -- Your throat is so fragile. -- Your blood will turn black. -- Nothing but a pile of ashes. -- Ashes to ashes, dusts to dusts. -- I will peel your face and put it into a book.

Movement -- Point me towards murderers. -- I will seek them out. -- There is nowhere to hide. -- I can smell them. -- I am bringing justice. -- I can't stop.

Joke -- I am not a virgin. -- Look forward, do you see those silent hills?

Taunt -- I will slice and dice you into million peaces before you even blink. -- I feel no remorse to you or anybody else.

Killing an enemy champion: -- This is not enough.

#4. OTHER INFO

Build examples:

  1. item 3111 item 3742 item 3022 item 3143 item 3800 item 3748
  2. item 3111 item 3742 item 3022 item 3143 item 3065 item 3812
  3. item 3006 item 3742 item 3068 item 3071 item 3748 item 3083

7 Comments

MikuTheWanderer 1 votes

Cool champion concept, but the abilities are kinda complex and confusing.

regonas5 votes

{quoted}

Well, i think riot needs more complex champions, champions with high skill cap. However, this is not chat complex.

Passive creates sparks. Q, W and E consumes them. Q knocking enemies into spark makes aoe explosion. Q knocking enemies into W will root them. Q knocking enemies into E heavily slows them. W consume sparks to grow in size. W can be placed on top of E. E consuming sparks make aoe attack. E hitting W makes aoe cleave. R doesn't interact with other abilities, but have many other different uses to be used between Q, W and E.

Kãt1 votes

I love this concept, but as was mentioned before, it might too complex. A few tweaks though to ability overlapping and cohesiveness, and I think this is a really solid champion idea.

regonas4 votes

{quoted}

Define what is too complex.

regonas5 votes

{quoted}

Also, if you like something, then give it an upvote, because as you can see from the score, jealous and hateful kids downvotes everything.

shadowsaotome1 votes

Overall I like the concept, and the abilities' interactions with each other are a nice touch. It's particularly interesting that all of his abilities scale with maximum health percentage; however, that really limits how efficient items can be for him. A few questions:

  1. For his passive, is the 30% come from his base health, or is it affected by runes/masteries/items?
  2. What are you trying to accomplish with the self-depleting health in his passive?
  3. What lane do you see Onyx being most effective in?
  4. Why would I choose Onyx over another champion in said lane?
  5. His mana costs seem very low, was this intentional?
  6. What would his base stats look like, and how would they scale per level?
  7. What are the charges for in his ultimate?

Now a few comments:

  • I like the synergy between his abilities, and although his ultimate feels a bit out of place, it does add some uniqueness to the kit.
  • The way his numbers look now, Onyx would have a horrendous early game, and I'm not sure how he'd overcome that. He has no consistent waveclear, and he needs items to get his health to high enough levels to really make his abilities hurt.
  • Onyx would definitely be able to wreak havoc in teamfights, being able to apply a guaranteed root with his W-Q combo.
  • It seems like you want to build Onyx really tanky, which seems out of place considering his character. Also, his optimal item builds are REALLY expensive, and Onyx has no real way to get kills for himself. He seems far more adept at setting up kills for his team.
  • Because he has no AD or AP scaling on his abilities, items that give him those stats seem wasted. Also, CDR would be a really big help considering how his spells interact with each other, but CDR items are mostly wasted stats on Onyx.
regonas5 votes

{quoted}

Good to know what there are still people who appreciate work put into make good champion. Thanks for an upvote. I will try to answer your questions:

  1. For his passive, is the 30% come from his base health, or is it affected by runes/masteries/items?
  2. What are you trying to accomplish with the self-depleting health in his passive?
  3. What lane do you see Onyx being most effective in?
  4. Why would I choose Onyx over another champion in said lane?
  5. His mana costs seem very low, was this intentional?
  6. What would his base stats look like, and how would they scale per level?
  7. What are the charges for in his ultimate?

~~ ~~

  1. (base health + bonus health from all other sources) + 30% from passive. So, if he have 2000 base health and 2000 bonus health from runes, masteries and items, then his total health will be 5200.

  2. As you are aware, he scales with health. His passive increases max health, his abilities deal damage based on max health. So, still, he have no built-in sustain in his kit, so he will need to get it trough items. Base health regen, life steal and such. He is tank and he is supposed to built tanky, so passive is for that reason. Without self-depleting life, he would be an assassin with high health (because of mobility, CC, etc). Also, for lore reasons.

  3. I would say top or mid. He should be against most melee champion with low sustain who do not have executes in their kits. Nevertheless, all mobility and CC in his kit would also make him excellent jungler, but early game would be a problem, because of passive. After building few items he could clear camps pretty fast and gank very effectively.

  4. Higher skill cap. Champions with higher skill cap can perform much better when mastered, compared to champions with low skill cap. He is tank/bruiser champion with many different options to combo abilities based on your needs. No other champion can be as versatile as he. You can choose of many different combos: Q into W for root; Q into passive for damage and stun; Q into E for massive slow; W into passive for larger radius; E into passive for aoe true damage; E into W for aoe cleave. All his combos are about important and tactical choises, and no other champion can offer this versatility.

  5. Yes, he already have self-depleting health pool. He is supposed to built a lot of health and nearly no mana.

  6. Well, something like usual tank stats. High base health, average base damage, low attack speed, average movement speed and so on.

  7. Number of uses (like Akali have).

  • I like the synergy between his abilities, and although his ultimate feels a bit out of place, it does add some uniqueness to the kit.
  • The way his numbers look now, Onyx would have a horrendous early game, and I'm not sure how he'd overcome that. He has no consistent waveclear, and he needs items to get his health to high enough levels to really make his abilities hurt.
  • Onyx would definitely be able to wreak havoc in teamfights, being able to apply a guaranteed root with his W-Q combo.
  • It seems like you want to build Onyx really tanky, which seems out of place considering his character. Also, his optimal item builds are REALLY expensive, and Onyx has no real way to get kills for himself. He seems far more adept at setting up kills for his team.
  • Because he has no AD or AP scaling on his abilities, items that give him those stats seem wasted. Also, CDR would be a really big help considering how his spells interact with each other, but CDR items are mostly wasted stats on Onyx.

~~ ~~ Well, i designed his passive, Q, W and E first. All of them fit perfectly together. I didn't want to break the balance of them, so i made R which could be used between other abilities, like: put W behind your enemy -> R for some damage -> knock back enemy into your W with Q for root -> R for some more damage -> E into W for cleave damage -> R for even more. Not only you will be locking an enemy while dealing damage to him/her, but you would also disrupt everyone behind him though R. True, he would have pretty bad early game. W and E would count as wave clears, but they do damage slowly and over-time. I tried to think of something how to change that, but any changes would impact his late game. Late game he should be very strong. If you have any suggestions, then i am open to hear them out. While yes, he should be the beast in teamfights, W+Q is not 100%. Enemies can move a little to wrong side, you can aim badly, enemies can flash or use any other mobility ability. That is why this champion have high skill cap. To win every and each team fight, you need to master him and executes combos perfectly. Yes, he is tank. At first, i wanted to make him full AD, but then the problem with health and his "natural survivability" comes out. For one, from his lore you could see that he survived many times deadliest situations (being tossed into river, being washed ashore, living many years in haunted forest, fighting many strong people, being blasted away with cannons). Simple attack damage wouldn't reflect that, so i decided to ho full health. Now, about item paths, these are just examples of what i would build. You could built him however you like. About kills, you might be right during early game. He have pretty low damage and combos must be executed very well to win trades (while in top or mid). However, after i did match for his hypothetical damage, i had to reduce number on his abilities several times. Simply put, he scales extremely well with health granting items against melee enemies. After level 6, if player executes every combo he could make perfectly, then this champion could devastate any other melee champion. I will give you example:

Lets say you ranked abilities like this: Q - W - E - Q - W - R and have built only one time ( item 3083 ), so now you have about 2500 max health, about 60 attack damage. You are playing top against some champion with low mobility. You mastered this champion and can execute most insane combos. Ash spark appears after you kill an minion. Bait enemy into attacking you and wait for perfect moment to execute your combos. Use R to put knock enemy into right position. Place W extremely close your ash spark, but do not consume it. Knock enemy back into your W, but close enough to trigger ash spark. Enemies suffers damage, is stunned and rooted. Use R close enough so that both twisters stay at least one second on an enemy. Follow up with E for cleave attack. Lets say you managed to put 2 basic attacks between this masterful combo. Finish your enemy off with another R (lets say for same damage as first R) Damage per ability would be: 120 physical damage from basic attacks 60 (+2% of your max health) physical damage from "wasted" R 180 (+12% of your max health) physical damage from Q 90 (+6% of you max health) magic damage from standing in W for 3 sec 40 (+3% of your max health) physical damage from E cleave 120 (+4% of your max health) physical damage from R 120 (+4% of your max health) physical damage from R again

Total damage would be about: 730 (+31% of your max health) = 1505 mixed (mostly physical) damage That is total average damage from perfectly used combo. If your target isn't building health or armor, then he/she will be killed or forced out of lane.

~~ ~~

So, the last comment. Yes, AP and AD are mostly wasted on him, however, basic attacks still scales with AD. If you want, you can still build some AD items to do more damage with basic attacks. Well, you can build whatever you want, i have seen many AD Teemos, many AD Threshs and many AD Fizzs.

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