A Question of Strategy

I have a question about a situation I recently found myself in:

Note: I'm not flaming anyone, or trying to say anyone is bad or anything like that, I always try to be respectful and calm in every match, regardless of the outcome. I just want to know what exactly I'm supposed to do in a situation like this. There has to be something. I have to be able to make a large enough impact to change the course of the game, otherwise what's the point of trying to improve if the way to win is to flip heads on the pre-game coin toss?

Our team:

Enemy team:

I am top. I am 6/1 over . I just won a 1v2 vs and Rhaast . I've taken the outer and inner top turrets, and we have 2 and several more in the enemy jungle on top side.

Bot lane is and . They are 0/11 and 0/8, respectively, as well as 60 cs behind and .

Bot lane is continuously pushing to tower and getting ganked, despite constant warning and several roams, which didn't amount to anything because our tower was gone and we had no map control on bot side, and no pressure mid due to being 1/2 against and refusing to pressure tower when she roamed, instead opting to follow her despite my politely worded suggestions. Every one of my roams ending up with them dead and me barely escaping alive, despite me getting a pick on during one of the skirmishes.

I suggest that we swap, because top tower is still up, and Irelia only has and , and is constantly shoving in trying to take tower as well.

I am confident that I can stay alive in bot lane, and potentially fight the and if I dodge his Q.

is not worth fighting with as she does no damage, and I figure if it's just me bot I won't pull as much pressure and could take the tower and start getting some map control on bot side

refused because "You don't lane swap until the tower is down."

I stated my reasoning: Top tower is up, you'll be safe there, is a late-game champion, and you need to farm. is weak, and you should be able to fight her 2v1, as long as you don't push past river. Rift herald is also up, and you can help our jungle contest it after you push, while I deal with bot.

Again, insisted that it is incorrect to swap before they get the tower down, and it has to be the ADC that gets the tower down because... reasons I still am unsure about.

I am legit wondering, who was correct here? It was far too late for me to snowball their lane, and I was just trying for some damage control, and to stall out til late game when she scales.

Did I make the right call or not? Was there something I should have done differently? I'd love any advice anyone might have for me, because I'm at a loss as to what I should have done differently.