No need to get snarky. All you had to ask was for the source code.
https://github.com/z-statistic/League-Damage-Sim/blob/master/.gitignore
The above code is to be use in R.
But to answer your questions:
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Uptime is the % of opportunities you use to attack to attack. If you have 50% uptime, you are not attacking 50% of the time that you should be for whatever reason, maybe out of range or cced or misclick.
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Crits are a random variable because crits are randomly decided? It can be useful to simulate the distribution instead of calculating the expected value.
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I'm not.
You're confusing yourself. I'm only saying that BoRK and LDR together mean that the balance of hp/armor is irrelevant when considering EHP vs basic attacks and THEREFORE, you should consider the other parts of the ADC's kit or the other team's when making balance of EHP decisions.
It's to answer the question, "Shit, Vayne has both BoRK AND LDR. Should I build more armor or hp to counter her?" with "It doesn't matter. Build HP to absorb magic damage from Vayne's team or armor to counter her team's physical damage."
edit: you also did incorrect calculation.
Damage per hit:
(150+0.03HP)(100/(100+0.55*Armor))
6000 HP and no Armor
(150+0.03*6000)=330 damage, about 19 shots to kill
2500 HP and 280 Armor
(150+0.032500)(100/(100+0.55*280))=89 damage, about 29 shots to kill.
It's 6000 with 100 base armor, and 2500 with 280 bonus armor and 100 bonus armor. So the calculations should be:
(150+0.036000)(100/(100+100)) = 165
6000/165 ~ 36
(150+0.032500)(100/(100+100+0.55*280)) = 63.55932
2500/63.55932 ~ 39
This is within the error you setup for yourself by estimating the solution to the differential equation by he linear function you created.