Shen Doesn't Suck
Almost no melee Ad top can beat him due to his OP hidden Ninja passive. 
and 
are the only ones who really beat him because of their sheer manliness.
"So what is this OP champion all about?"
Pros:
- Is a ninja (duh).
- Great harass and trades.
- Decent (but slow) dueling. If you can trade well against an enemy, you can probably duel them.
- Arguably the best map presence in the game. I feel like a god every time someone tries to get a kill, only for their dreams to be shattered by a 800 damage shield.
- Can dash through walls
- Decent sustain
- Since you get the XP of a top laner, you are an extra effective tank.
- Did I mention, his name means "God" in another language?
Cons:
- Close ranged
- His taunt is very unforgiving. Miss it and consider yourself silenced.
- Weak vs Long ranged tops.
- Ult always goes on full cooldown, even when your target dies or it is canceled.
- Relatively weak team fight initiate.
- Can heal enemies if they attack a monster marked with a Doran's blade.
- Cannot secure kills for himself well.
- Requires excellent map awareness so you can ult when someone is in trouble.
- Is forced to take
over 
or watch his tower die as he slowly walks toward it after ulting bot.
"What do his moves do? I bet they're awesome."
Passive: CS Strike - Every something seconds, your attacks do bonus damage based on how thin your hp bar is (more hp = thinner hp bar = More damage), and gives you energy. The cooldown is decrease by 1 second every time you ninja slash someone. Great for harassing or killing creeps. Works on towers too! Be sure to max! ;)
Q: Doran's Blade Toss - Throws a Doran's blade at a target that floats above the targets head for a few seconds. As long as it floats there, attacks against this target heal the attacker. Super low cooldown. Max this first. Stacked Dorans' ftw! :D
W: Block - Shields you, blocking some damage. While shielded, CS Strike's cooldown is reduce by double per attack. Also spammy. Use to block everything. Max second. Blocking OP.
E: Supta Dash - Moves slightly in the direction chosen, turning all the champs caught in it into bronzies for 1.5 seconds. Bronzies do half damage when using their basic attacks and focus the enemy tank (you) with only their basic attcks because they're in bronze. For each person you Supta Dash past, you get energy. Max last because no one like bronzies.
R: Nope! Shields an ally for a bazillion and causes you to teleport to them a few seconds later if they are still alive. Did mention it has infinite range? The ultimate tool of a god. Save your people...
Pretty hardcore moves, am I right?
"How do I play this guy without getting the lowest score ever?"
Just keep calm and press these buttons.
Q to poke your enemies/heal off of minions.
W to shield whatever the enemy though they were going to damage you with.
E when not too over extended to escape or force your enemies to become a bronzies.
R to make your teammates not die..
Specific champs have specific counters, so if you want to know how to beat an opponent, just leave a comment.
"Is Shen really OP?"
Nope. He's still good though.
