5-portal build: How do you counter it if their "Hatchery" is guarded by a "Bunker"?

Imagine a game where the enemy team gets 5 Zz'Rot Portals, and has a Teemo, Heimerdinger and Zyra (or something like that). They put all the portals in one patch of brush, set up turrets and mines, and dare you to approach them. You can't kill the portals with ranged spells, only with auto-attacks. Since they're in brush, you have to get on top of them to kill them. Any attempt to assault that "Hatchery" (as I'll call it) is utter suicide because of the mines and turrets creating what I call a "Bunker".

Does that seem at all fair? Not to me. Why? Because in the middle of all these anti-tower measures, Riot has not given the players any new means of turret DEFENSE. They die faster than ever, suck more than ever, and trying to defend them generally results in that turret getting you killed.

Riot, I know Fortify was toxic, but that doesn't mean there should be no means of protecting turrets outside of Janna's shield. More and more, they just keep becoming heavier burdens that don't contribute at all. No one fears turrets while diving these days. Rather, they thank the turrets for helping them kill you.

Anybody want to discuss this? I really wish they could've given Ohmwrecker some sort of ally-turret effect.

EDIT: Okay, maybe 5 portals is unrealistic, but even 2-3 portals can be nasty to deal with under the right circumstances.