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NEW **SECRET** STRATEGICAL GUIDE TO TOP LANE

buPPDrmXEO··109 votes·27,294 views

Hear, hear, you top lane mains, I am doing you all a favor and making this FOOL PROOF SEASON 7 guide for each and every one of you.

It's time to maximize the carry potential of your role, it's time to fully utilize your position, and win EVERY single game of League of Legends!!! (Where your teammates don't suck)

I have been diamond since season 3 playing nothing but top lane, so I am more than qualified to write this guide.

First, a little introduction, there are a few things you have to understand about top lane :

  1. You are not supposed to win your lane

Unless you are playing Riven or Camille you winning the lane means absolutely NOTHING, so don't even bother! Don't even bother picking Riven or Camille, cause you want the enemy to pick those so you can fully stomp them into the ground.

  1. YOUR only goal is to get your jungler ahead

Think of your enemy top laner as a special 300g camp for your jungler, the only thing is ... You have to prep that camp for him, you are your JUNGLER's bitch, either that or you are your enemy's jungler BITCH and trust me, you don't wanna be the latter cause you will actually lose the game.

With junglers being so god damn broken that nowadays they take up 3/6 bans despite Le Blanc still being a Le Blanc (even after 3 years of Riot GAME reworks), your goal is to get your jungler ahead by manipulating the enemy top laner.

STRATEGY:

Summoner Spells : Teleport and Flash (Duh, if you thought it's gonna be something else you shouldn't top lane at all - only mid laners get to pick their summoner spells)

Starting Items : Cloth / 4 pots, Long Sword / 4 pots, Corruption Potion / Doran Ring 2 pots

DISCLAIMER :

Never ever start doran shield / doran blade unless you are intentionally trying to lose the game

Preferred Champions : Anything that has a stun or slow (the more the merrier)

STRATEGY: (part2)

Okay, now that we got the basic schematics out of the way, onto the actual strategy involved into this UNBELIVABLY overpowered tactic.

IN the champion select you must tell your jungler the following : Start on the side opposite of me, RUSH top on level 3 I will let the enemy push!

At this point pick your champion (it's better if you counterpick yourself and give that silly enemy top laner a false sense of confidence ha ha ha , he might actually think top lane counterpicks matter).

STRATEGY: (part3)

This is the bread and butter of this uncounterable strategy. You are going to play to not lose. You won't play to win , that just isn't worth it on top , you will play NOT to lose. Remember this and even repeat it inside your head. Even if enemy top laner is making tragic mistakes DO NOT attempt to fully engage on him - for all you know, he is baiting you so that the enemy jungler can come pick up 300g off of you by 1 shotting you!!!!!

Whatever the match up is , you do not want to engage your top laner unless he's directly trying to tower dive you, use your sustain and back off farm. Remember - he is farming, which means he is pushing, which means your jungler can come top and f***k him up!!!!! Him farming is actually a good thing for you. You farming is a bad thing for YOU! If you really have to farm just last hit, never use your skills.

DISCLAIMER:

Don't even think about touching the first wave, pretend you're going to farm but don't, don't even last hit (I'm serious) also, try and get hit a few times so that your dumb ass enemy top laner ( who didn't read about this awesome strategy guide ) aggros the minions and pushes towards you, then spam ping your jungler to remind him of his promise about lv3 gank.

Once your enemy top laner has pushed enough, ping your jungler where it's warded, or write in chat when he put the ward down and remember that wards last only 1 min so spam ping your jungler again after 1 min.

Eventually your enemy top laner will die a few times to your jungler , unlocking him and making him able to do plays all over the map.

Winning top is NOT good, you only get 300g for yourself, an useless top laner that only participates in the game after 20 minutes (unless he fed the enemy jungler in which case you're participating, but negatively ! )

THINK about it. 300g on you that will only be used against your top laner, or 300g on your jungler that will be used AGAINST THE ENTIRE MAP snowballing into infinite amounts once your jungler starts going around 2 shotting people including your top laner!

DO NOT WIN YOUR LANES, LET YOUR JUNGLER DO THE HEAVY WORK WHILE YOU PREP THE ENEMY TOP LANER FOR HIM!!!

ALSO BUILD FULL TANK NOTHING ELSE IS ACCEPTABLE OR ELSE ENEMY JUNGLER WILL HAVE AN EASY TIME DIVING YOU!

GOOD LUCK!

120 Comments

Off Meta Evan58 votes

as someone who plays an extremely selfish, "as long as i'm ahead we can win.", hates my team mates, carry top Laner play style. this tilted me because not only is it probably a more effecient way to gain lp, not only is it a style of play thats extremely bitch made/unfun, NOT ONLY is it a reasonable guide for those who want to play like that, but its also such a big and honestly true statement about the game. league of legends for top laners for the longest time i feel has been "league of legends Ft top lane sometimes."

TotalJerk3 votes

People complain about support and make memes about "ADCs in 2017 lul", but imaqtpie says he started queuing nothing but fill for a while and the role he got the most in high elo is top because "nobody plays that shit", he also said that a huge part of why lane bullies have such high winrates in high elo is that there are very few actual top lane mains in high elo so they tend to not know the matchups and just get stomped.

RiotRiot Ellarian35 votes

only mid laners get to pick their summoner spells

So true it hurts...

Melledoneus9 votes

Riot Mantikles.

Man. Tikles.

Man Tickles.

Your name has me writhing in envy.

RiotRiot Ellarian2 votes

Melledoneus.

Melle. Done. Us.

Well done, us!

Did I do it right? :D What's the origin of your name?

Melledoneus4 votes

The origin of the name "Melledoneus" is a mystery. Some say it is a word derived from the Elvish term "meledon," meaning "friendly." Others believe a man once named Mel Ledon merged his name to create it. A few even say that they derive from a randomizer that turned up with the words melon, don, and news. However, the real origin dates back to a legend only a select know by heart. An aspiring writer was thinking of the perfect name for the respected and powerful commander, who had to deal both with enemies outside his home city and those lurking within, waiting to strike. However, the writer found trouble: he had created a man, but could not attribute a name for this figure he had devised. He turned to the internet, finding the name Amaranth to his suiting. However, soon he found the name not fitting enough, not royal enough to respect this saint-like man. So, he devised a name: Meledon.

Meledon! What a fantastic name, the writer thought, using the find and replace tool on Word to replace Amaranth. However, his victory was soon short lived. The name still wasn't good enough. Meledon sounded like an elvish name, of a haughty, arrogant king of the wood who expected nothing short of praise and fidelity from all. And yet, it did not sound graceful enough! Not... medieval enough. So, he wracked his brain yet again, until he thought of it! Thelonius was a character's name he remembered, and the last 2 syllables made it sound just like he liked it! So, he tried again: Meledoneus. Perfect! So yet again the writer replaced the name, thinking that another L would make it perfect. Melledoneus, how royal!

The writer was content with himself. His character's name was complete. And when he first started accessing online games and communities, he came across a curious multiplayer game with clans named Plazmaburst 2. And what better name to make a username than Melledoneus? The man who would be known to every clan as the eloquently writing, calm, collected, yet stern Melledoneus. The man whose clan was small yet influential. If you search on google on this day, you will find every place the name Melledoneus has been used, by one man and one man only. None have been able to copy the legendary yet enigmatic figure known as Melledoneus to this day.

Fin

RiotRiot Ellarian2 votes

damn...your origin story is a lot better than mine...

Melledoneus1 votes

Nah, I overachieved.

Dominick Destine3 votes

[{quoted}](name=Riot Mantikles,realm=NA,application-id=3ErqAdtq,discussion-id=kfVEEgum,comment-id=0033,timestamp=2017-01-28T00:27:36.471+0000)

So true it hurts...

Meddler looks different today.

RiotRiot Ellarian2 votes

:3

Meep Man9 votes

Jungle: summoner 4 summoner 11 ADC: summoner 4 summoner 7 Support: summoner 4 summoner 3 Top: summoner 4 summoner 12

To be fair, it's hard to have variety when half of your Summoner Spell options are always going to be Flash, forever and ever.

ModJango Mage2 votes

Jungle: summoner 11 Is always there for abvious reasons. And most of the its with summoner 4 . Altough its switched with summoner 6 a lot of times. And in rare cases summoner 3 summoner 14 . ADC: Yea they can only go with summoner 4 summoner 7 . But adc is literally the role with the least variety. Wonder why it doesnt has subclasses... Support: summoner 4 most of the time summoner 3 sometimes summoner 14 Top: summoner 4 or summoner 6 and summoner 12 orsummoner 14 /summoner 3 . But from a startegic view the first 3 are the best. Mid: Yea, literally everthing. summoner 4 summoner 14 summoner 21 summoner 3 summoner 6 summoner 1 summoner 12 summoner 7 in some metas even summoner 11 .

Golden Tager X22 votes

This feels like it would be better off in M&G due to how it was worded, but it is actually pretty goddamn true.

Spaceman5pff19 votes

Particularly useful addition to this guide:

Pick Maokai, Nautilus, or Poppy.

Nothing else is acceptable.

Knoyle3 votes

Pick Sejuani so you can Wave clear and take the enemy turret faster after getting the jungler a kill.

SzGamer22718 votes

Darius but but I eat other top laners for breakfast, and when I get tower first blood after I make the enemy jungler MY bitch, my whole team gets gold [zombie-nunu-tears]

Troll for Trump17 votes

So Top lane is support now.

Got it, thanks for ruining Top Riot. It was ADCs top last season, this season top's useless.

ModAcademy Kayn10 votes

Your name satisfies me to a breakfast level.

Escheton10 votes

It´s sad that this is actually completely true and viable.

ModKnightsKemplar10 votes

This guide is sickeningly good.

Ionian Vulpix9 votes

But when I jungle, top lane tends to feed before I can finish my second camp.

Reaper Soraka8 votes

I hate to say it...but this actually sounds like a foolproof plan....Except for that part of not CSing. I'm far too bronze to try skipping a last hit. Maybe I can get to silver with it though!

Duke Anax6 votes

Is that sarcasm?

Skipping last hits is pretty much exactly what we do in Bronze.

ZT Xperimentor8 votes

That's assuming the jungler comes top at all.

Ungrateful Thug7 votes

Sad, but also elements of truth to it. [zombie-nunu-tears]

EvilMerodach7 votes

{quoted}

Hear, hear, you top lane mains, I am doing you all a favor and making this FOOL PROOF SEASON 7 guide for each and every one of you.

It's time to maximize the carry potential of your role, it's time to fully utilize your position, and win EVERY single game of League of Legends!!! (Where your teammates don't suck)

0% winrate here I come! item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070

Really though, guide to how to win when your team isn't carrying you is probably more practical. Never depend on random team mates from the start of a game. Watch them enough to see if they're decent, and only depend on the ones that don't fail basic derp tests. (Can they farm? Can they not blow summoners for stupid reasons? Can they use trinket past level 4? etc.)

Don't mean to dis your guide..but unless you can duo with a jungle main, I wouldn't build a strat that depends on them.

Still decent advice about not tryhard'ing to win lane, cause, yes, winning top isn't that useful. Even fed you're not going to single-handedly carry the game. But feeding enemy jungler to oblivion will single-handedly throw a game.

TheFallenShaw1 votes

{quoted}

0% winrate here I come! item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070 item 3070

Really though, guide to how to win when your team isn't carrying you is probably more practical. Never depend on random team mates from the start of a game. Watch them enough to see if they're decent, and only depend on the ones that don't fail basic derp tests. (Can they farm? Can they not blow summoners for stupid reasons? Can they use trinket past level 4? etc.)

Don't mean to dis your guide..but unless you can duo with a jungle main, I wouldn't build a strat that depends on them.

Still decent advice about not tryhard'ing to win lane, cause, yes, winning top isn't that useful. Even fed you're not going to single-handedly carry the game. But feeding enemy jungler to oblivion will single-handedly throw a game.

Guy who wrote this guide sounds like a Nasus main. Cough.

Gregor Gysi6 votes

Actually legit guide, recommended for elo whores.

jaymc11306 votes

As a 4 time diamond player, 1 time master tier player, and recent high diamond jungle main I fully approve and recommend this guide. My jungler guide, if I were to write one, would be this guide, with the minor addendum to always start at the opposing top side buff camp (maximum early enemy Jg denial, both enemy top and enemy Jg become useless for the next 15 minutes of game time) whenever practicable.

As a jungler/top laner you absolutely cannot go wrong with this style of open, it is the most effective and efficient opening in the game and has been for several years. It allows top lane a lead, jungle a lead, and completely dismantles one half of the enemy map for the entirety of lane phase allowing your team to focus exclusively on objective control in the bottom half of the map.

This strategy is so effective you can easily maintain a 70% or better win rate. For reference one need only check last season's duo stats for oOBestEveNAOo and my partner Jack Sparrah. A 50ish game sample size is available to be drawn upon and the graphs don't lie. It took about 2 weeks to go unranked to diamond in just over 150 games. This strategic opening is indeed that strong, use it.

The Ender Cobra5 votes

{quoted}

win EVERY single game of League of Legends!!! (Where your teammates don't suck)

So... we're never going to win any games? #bronzlyf

Moskripoz5 votes

10/10 guide post it on IGN

agbudar5 votes

so basically:

blame the jungler for your loss [slayer-pantheon-thumbs]

Azuregore4 votes

{quoted} Think of your enemy top laner as a special 300g camp for your jungler, the only thing is ... You have to prep that camp for him, you are your JUNGLER's bitch, either that or you are your enemy's jungler BITCH and trust me, you don't wanna be the latter cause you will actually lose the game.

I like this part. Had 2 games yesterday where I was against a top Camille . One match I went Trundle , built triforce then full tank and made myself a big ol' target for their entire team. I'd ult Camille to make her useless for tanking, while they're team would blow absolutely everything to get rid of me, thankfully, my mid Veigar waddled his little bum right up to them and deleted them from the map.

For the other one, again same trundle shit, cept this time my jng was Shaco who proceeded to camp top and got nice n fat off of Camille. The enemy MasterYi was a cannon minion by that point.

General Esdeath 3 votes

{quoted}

Don't even bother picking Riven

You lost me

Melledoneus3 votes

Shen Fuck the jungler, I'm going bot.

Rikari3 votes

{quoted}

IN the champion select you must tell your jungler

Nope I'm bronze I have no jungler even when garen runs tp ignite and pushes to tower till 40 mins

Hello I am Bird7 votes

39 minutes: Garen GOT THE FIRST TOWER

Large Minivan3 votes

lmaokai

RexSaur3 votes

Junglers need to be gutted already, they could use a full season of being the teams second support again.

Mindworm Jim3 votes

How about the mirror match? What do you do if the enemy toplaner is also using this guide?

dominusx2 votes

Darius what about my dunks?

MFTORANK12 votes

This guide def doesn't work below gold even there I don't think it would, wouldn't know about plat+. You can't trust low elo junglers most of them don't have map awareness, they will consistantly counter-pick themselves in the jungle and make terrible decisions pathing/ganking wise. I'd rather have a 50CS lead over my opponent and take his tower and die once, then lose farm and wait for a gank that might never come or might fail.

AcidTheWarlock2 votes

I haven't gotten a gank for the past about 10 games I've played, jungler stays bot all the time.

TheSequelsRBad2 votes

Illaoi "THIS IS MOTION" (Gets Pentakill.)

Ariel the Cruel2 votes

Preferred Champions : Anything that has a stun or slow (the more the merrier) ... ALSO BUILD FULL TANK NOTHING ELSE IS ACCEPTABLE OR ELSE ENEMY JUNGLER WILL HAVE AN EASY TIME DIVING YOU!

Leona top is coming back, kids!

dakota saturn1 votes

Lol @ LeBlanc QQ.

She's an extremely fair champion especially after the rework and has lots of counterplay. If you sit there and go AFK while the sigil is cooking, it's your own fault if she kills you.

If you see the giant flashing warning lights, try either clicking away from her or right clicking her and she dies in 1-2 auto attacks.

Arakadia19 votes

Yes. Leblanc dies in 1-2 autos. Unless I misunderstood you.

DarkSunSovereign1 votes

What if I can only play mage toplaners? Swain

deltemp9515121 votes

if your playing swain then enemy top laner will most likely pick galio and beat you into the ground.

Joseraph2 votes

Who?

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