It's Your Fault: The Spirit of Competition
After playing a lot of competitive HotS matches, I mused on League and how my experience differs between the two games. While discussing the matter of toxicity and competitive drive with my friend, we came to a realization:
The only common factor between all your losses is you.
People are swift to blame teammates. So-and-so didn't ADC well enough. Mid fed. The jungler didn't gank. Whatever. But the fact of the matter is, you are the only common denominator present in every one of your losses. You can only account for your own play. Trashing your teammates for your loss accomplishes nothing, save for encouraging yourself to cling to negative emotion that drives you to make stupid plays in your next game.
I think this tendency is born of something deeper, though: The inability for people to see this game for what it is. This is a video game. It's for fun. You're not going to become a billionaire, or change the world, or found a nation, or what have you, if you climb to Challenger and crush your opposition. Ask yourself why you're playing this game. I can guarantee you it eventually comes back to enjoying yourself. Having a good time.
Before you chime in with, "Well I'm not having a good time if the asshats bot are feeding," I'm going to clue you in on something vital about unavoidable the essence of competition.
For you to win, someone else has to lose.
When two sides are opposed, every element has an inverse.
This is why competition is meant to be a friendly thing. Not doing so well? No big deal, you gave it your best shot. Pat eachother on the back, congratulate your opponents, and move on to the next game. Had an amazing performance? Thank your opponents for the game and move on. You'll be in their shoes before long. This is the essence of competition.
There are only two things that have starkly opposed interests: Competition and conflict. League of Legends is most certainly not conflict. For conflict to be present, one must have a mutually contested goal. Something serious. Something with lasting consequences. War is a conflict, because the winner decides the fate of millions. Legislative debates are conflict because the future of the nation is at stake. Arguments over your career are a conflict because the winner dictates how comfortably you're living for the foreseeable future.
A win or loss in League of Legends carries none of that weight. Assuming you get to the very top of the game, and no one has your skill... Assuming that point is utterly undisputed... What does that profit you? Bragging rights? Big deal. Bragging rights are great, but they're superficial, and anyone with sense recognizes this.
"But I might go pro!" Take it from someone who has played Tekken for money on numerous occasions: If you want to make money, get a career. If you want to have fun, play games. The prize money in a gaming tournament has never added up to the sheer fun factor of the game itself. It's a "grass is always greener" concept. You think everything would be perfect if you could just edge yourself into the LCS scene, but you'd soon find the income is unreliable and if you're not careful, you stop enjoying the game entirely because it becomes more of a job.
In the end, you are here for recreation.
No recreational activity is important enough to throw around terms like "dog eat dog", "you have expectations to meet", or any of the other nonsense I've seen flying around the boards on this topic. If you wouldn't tell your buddy to fall on a sword because he missed a few rebounds in a pickup basketball game, it's something you shouldn't be throwing around on League either. League is no more important than a friendly game of two-hand touch in the park, or a round of miniature golf.