How do I beat j4?

Im not gonna act like a saint because I picked darius but then he picks j4. The entire lane consisted of me trying to last to freeze but getting spammed q by an ability that seemingly costed 0 mana when used off cooldown and did 1/8 of my hp at level 2..... 8 hits = bye. So after 5m of not being able to freeze the lane because his spam q could simultaneously poke me out while shoving the lane into a reset via tower damage I tried to use q to farm from a distance. One issue, darius q shoves hard as FUCK so as soon as I got past river he just all in me and I died in all of 4 seconds. Shyvana refused to do anything until 6 and then didn't help and chose to camp bot until a J4 came down and one shot both the adc and support. shocker it's almost like I said he was shitting on me and I needed help.

He had more base stats than me in resistance and DAMAGE. He had more HP than me. His moves did more damage than mine.... The champ completely outclasses mine. His shield at level 3 was strong enough to not only block my Q AT THE TIP but to also shield from the bleed. Like what? His q shreds more armor than my E and his E+Q combo does more damage than my E+W combo. The only thing I had on him was a heal but it's largely not effective when he can 1. block all the damage and 2. use e+q to negate the heal by taking point blank damage.

Playing safe and last hitting didn't work, using ranged farming didn't work, fighting him HELLA din't work, roaming didn't work cas ya know we had a lucian mid and they had an lb so with what CC was I roaming with to catch her? I understand counterpicks but I don't think a counter should be so hard literally no playstyle will work and your performance is based off your jg. I can't find a single article saying I can win that match-up. That's disgusting.