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The Dumbass Demacians & The Arrogant Villain Noxians

Subject 5··4 votes·716 views

Poppy Complete and total fucking doofis. Probably one of the most braindead mother fuckers in Demacia - why did ya'll make her so incompetently stupid? Granted - I like the character, definitely one of favorites - but holy hell, the IQ is less than 50.

Lux You know that anime character that is never down in the dumps and is always gleaming with happiness? The one that just got her entire family slaughtered and then her best friend got raped, mugged, infested with 10 STD's who then contracted them to 'her' the same night it all happened - including AIDS and is somehow totally fine with everything - and is completely 'chill' and happy that it all happened? Yeah, that's Lux. Why do the good guys need to have this aura? Not all good guys are . . . like perfect shining figures.

Garen Who needs a personality when you can just say some generic: "I protect Justice!" am I right, Clark? Dude says some of the most white knight shit with no personality to it - it's like he's trying to cosplay a generic background character from an anime - you know, the type of character that gives popular opinion that can be seen as all 'right' and all 'good' so that you're basically forced to agree with them? That's Garen for ya!

Shyvana Respect me. I'm a dragon. Rawr. My voice changes when I'm a dragon. I have claws. I'm really feisty. I'm an archetype of a character that has less than a paragraph worth of substance to it.

Galio What if we made a character that was completely and totally arrogant - yet completely oblivious to the world like most anime 'heros' are - and then we state like completely unoriginal comments like: "People go away and new people replace them" like holy shit, do you think so? Do you really think so Galio? People don't live a million years - really dude? Holy - did you learn your intelligence from Poppy or something? (I refuse to believe that Poppy is THAT retarded though.) "Apparently I'm some type of big deal." <----- That comments holds a lot of character to it, doesn't it?

Noxia. The "I'm a villain - see, look at the words I'm puking out of my mouth" group of champions.

Katarina "Because I can." "If you run you won't see me stab you." "Let the bloodshed continue!" "Blood for Noxus!" Alright- I get it - bro. She's a villain - so where exactly is the personality? Is she a fucking serial killer that ONLY thinks about killing people? That's just what Noxia is - a bunch of serial killers that have absolutely no personality to them. Look at Talon.

Talon "Pathetic!" "Another body for the gutter." "Only fools pledge life to honor." "Eventually, my blades will find their way into your heart." Alright - another villain, cool? I get it - but hey, at least Katarina's voice changes between monotones. This guy had his balls bleached when he was 5 - so he can't even manage to hit any tone other than "I'm a zombie" levels of boring. Why does this guy exist? Why's he important? Is he just this random dude that's like apparently a good killer, and only thinks about killing? Isn't that Sions identity? Why does the entirety of Noxia have Sions identity again?

Darius The exception of the "Noxia effect." At least this guy is different, right? I mean - there isn't A LOT to say about this guy. He's a warrior. Woo. He kills people because . . . prestige? Errr power? . . . Wait why are these guys even fighting each other in the first place????? Anyways . . . let's just insert some random quotes about Noxia being great again: "Noxus will rise." there we go - now he's the big cheese.

TL;DR: Why are Demacians overwhelming dumber than a box of rocks & Noxians overwhelmingly blood thirsty for absolutely no reason? Are we going with "Well the Noxian culture is blood thirsty" because that's fucking bullshit. And the: "But Demacians are naturally dumber than a box of rocks because-" again - WAYYYY too general. Holy. You're talking about supposedly million of people in this make believe world - why are all of these people near clones of one another?

Side note: Why not use some of that fat wallets money to hire an actual professional writer? Who is writing this stuff, an 80 year old man who is so far out of touch with what's 'hip?'

12 Comments

ModWulf Helhammer13 votes

So you haven't read any of the updated lore than. Good to know.

Fix your ignorance before you attempt to make another post on the subject.

Subject 51 votes

{quoted}

So you haven't read any of the updated lore than. Good to know.

Fix your ignorance before you attempt to make another post on the subject.

It's sad to see that none of the lore is actually in the game, rip. As the characters stand in-game, they're incredibly dumb - until you look at the comics.

ModWulf Helhammer4 votes

The lore hasn't been explicitly in game for several years now.

And if you look at the top bar of any official league website, you'll see the big button that says "UNIVERSE", also featured on the LoL website homepage and the main page in the client everytime something new happens.

You have no excuse for saying they make it too hard to find stuff.

Subject 51 votes

{quoted}

The lore hasn't been explicitly in game for several years now.

And if you look at the top bar of any official league website, you'll see the big button that says "UNIVERSE", also featured on the LoL website homepage and the main page in the client everytime something new happens.

You have no excuse for saying they make it too hard to find stuff.

Except for the fact that all of this is lacking from the game, none of said content is in the game and none of said content has any impact on the character in the game. Cool comic strip, but then again - it has close to no reflection to the actual game and to how the characters actually act. I realize the lore hasn't been explicitly in the game for several years now, hard to believe out of a company that's made like . . . how much money? What game has lore but doesn't put it in the actual game? Why not make the comic strips reflect the characters personalities in the game? This entire post was based on the fact that these characters are actual Christmas Trees and Jack-O-Lanterns trying to live up to the title and description. All of these people are describing characters that have close to no personality in the actual game. Like. Alright - hold on, hold on - I get it - I'm the bad guy for wanting actual character in the actual game and not the comic strip - I GET IT NOW. Holy, mark me off as a Noxian- whatever - we don't get lore in the actual game, gotch'uh.

ModWulf Helhammer3 votes

Because most of the champions getting lore updates are incredibly old, made for a story that no longer exists, and it's not feasible to update them in game at this moment in time.

Subject 51 votes

{quoted}

Because most of the champions getting lore updates are incredibly old, made for a story that no longer exists, and it's not feasible to update them in game at this moment in time.

"Oh yeah, I have this new toy - it's got all of these features! It's just that you can't use any of the features, you've gotta go to the store and just look at it. You know, just imagine actually using those features."

Umbral Regent8 votes

"dumber than a box of rocks" is probably something I'd use exclusively to describe this post. Like TouchFluffyTail said, you very likely have not read any of the lore, and are just going based on in-game quotes. Which, while quotes are meant to characterize the Champions, they're only a snippet of them; the rest of their character is in their lore, background, and color stories.

Poppy - She's not braindead, and not incompetently stupid. I'm not sure if you saw the comic that came around her release, but she DESTROYED a gigantic earthen elemental. She's not incompetent, just oblivious - but better still, she's wholly dedicated to her cause. She was given a task by Orlon to find the Hero of Demacia, to whom the Hammer of Orlon's true power would awaken; and she's the hero, but she doesn't know it, and she's too modest to even fathom it.

Lux - This one is probably one of the biggest examples that you don't even glance at the lore, let alone know where to find it. Luxanna Crownguard is positive because she needs to be positive; if she were dour and unhappy all the time, then she'd just be a depressed sad-sack, and you'd like her even less as that. And the kicker? She has to face a ton of conflict, mostly inner-turmoil, because she's a Mage in Demacia - she'd be a pariah if anyone beside her mother knew. And she struggles with it, a lot. But, again; you don't read the lore, so you wouldn't know this.

Garen - Garen is fairly generic, but he's probably got more personality than you, considering that, while blindly following the path of justice, he still has a sense of humor ("Hey, look! I'm holding the world up!" "Darius, eat your heart out."), a sense of honor and community, and so on. Sure, he's blockheaded, but that doesn't mean he has no personality.

Shyvana - You sound like an ass when you try to distill Shyvana's character like that. You should consider reading her Biography and Color Story.

Galio - Again; READ BEFORE TALKING. Galio is oblivious to the world because he's only awake for fleeting moments, brought to life by sorcerors and mages in conflicts that the Demacians drag him into. Once he's back in Demacia, he only has a brief time before the magic drains from him, so by the next big war that brings him back to life, all those people he saw last time will have been gone, generations of descendants taking their place.

And his quote "Apparently I'm some kind of big deal?" does hold a lot of character, since Galio only considers himself a fighter, someone who lives in the now and likes to hit things. Hard. And yet, Demacia reveres him as a totem of victory, courage, and defiance against the odds. He's not stupid (and neither is Poppy), he's just simple. When he lives, he lives, and that's all that really matters to him.

Katarina - Katarina's quotes are really nothing to go by, but they still (in some small way) encapsulate who she is; a thrill-seeking, cocky assassin who kills and mocks those she slaughters. But, again; one who does not read lore will not ever know what they talk about - as you do.

Talon - Talon is not a valid point to make in either case; yes, his lines don't convey anything about him, and even worse is that his lore and quotes are both outdated, so neither of us can speak about him. Just know that he was a cutthroat who was only ever bested once, because that bit of lore is probably going to stick.

And before I get to Darius, I want to point out something about Sion;

Sion - Sion's identity isn't just a "really good killer who thinks only about killing", it's "a legendary warrior who fought to the bitter end for Noxus' glory, even going so far as to kill Jarvan I, whose crown now makes up his lower jaw. He's not just a "really good killer", he's a legacy for a warrior-kingdom. And he doesn't "only think about killing", he thinks about his past and his death, he's only fueled into the "killing" mindset by the blood magic that ignites his rage and makes him a death machine.

Darius - As Garen is the avatar of Demacian Justice, Darius is Noxian ruthlessness personified. Cold, fearless, and unyielding, but also, thanks to a recent comic, we find out he has a soft-side (that doesn't affect the cold mentality he has. he's resolute, but he still cares.), and he is, all-in-all, a Noxian badass.

And also, this is a really, really small sample-size to go with when talking about both kingdoms (granted, Demacia doesn't have a whole lot of Champions, but still.)

If you want to learn more about Demacia and Noxus (although I doubt you do), attached are links to their pages in the League of Legends Universe site.

You'll also want to consider reading the lores of each of the Champions for either Region, because you may find that their in-game quotes belie much more than you'd ever know.

KoKoboto6 votes

Garen isn't a block head... Lux describes him as subtle and cunning. He's smarter than your average person yet because he's big people naturally associate him with being dull.

He's not.

Umbral Regent1 votes

Very true; I'll admit, my mind only reaches out to the biggest negative highlights of his character (namely that public execution in For Demacia), and for some reason that part of me blocked out his cleverness and tender heart as shown alongside his valor and honor in The Soldier and the Hag.

Thanks for the correction there!

Digielf2 votes

TalonTalon and KatarinaKatarina are both part of the Thieves Guild they follow specific regulations and if it benefits they will kill

Dreamspitter1 votes

Did you read Lux's "League Judgment"? No?

I thought so.

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