Honestly, it's not even that I've stopped giving fucks. Or maybe it is, idk. If I was losing games on my main, then I'd probably be more angry. But day after day I've been playing around, trying out new champs that I can't get the hang of (
) or replaying champions that I stopped playing for a while (
) and it has just been a fucking train of shit.
Like I can play Ryze in mid and do awful, like I can't do shit despite doing ok. But then fighting another Ryze I see them do all this shit way better and I think to myself "Where did I fuck up?"
Then I found myself playing against plat players twice while we have a level 18 on our team. TWICE. Why is it that below 30 normals are some of the most insane matches?
By the time I was playing
into
, I suddenly found myself giving no shits and making stupid mistakes. Like chasing a Taliyah across the fucking map. ACROSS THE FUCKING MAP. Or wasting my ult on Aatrox when he wasn't low enough, only to have him fly away.
I should feel pissed, and maybe I do. But...fuck idk. I'm more mad at myself than anything else.