Thank you Riot for Blitzcrank!
(this post is sarcastic joke for those that don't know) I am a support main who has never lost a single game. I am currently number one in challenjour! I just want to say thank you to rito for creating blitzcrank! I feel so bored never losing a single game! Well, thanks to the great steam golem, my win/loss ratio is very well balanced now! I used to never die and constantly get all of the kills in the game but now, I get to experience the never-felt-before feeling of losing! I remember I constantly whined about how champions like Katarina, Akali, Master Yi, Teemo, Lee Sin and Nidalee were op. With Blitzcrank, I finally know how spoiled I was to complain about all those balanced champions. Akali is killed easily out of her shroud, Katarina is dead if she is stunned during her ult, Teemo can't kill you if you scan for his shrooms, Lee Sin is blind, Yi can be stunned and Nidalee is too squishy if you dodge the slow moving spear!
I feel so dumb feeling those champions were op! Blitzcrank can hook you and you're dead! YAY! Whether anyone else is nearby or not, Of course, you can run away from him... until he W and does his QER combo while you can't do jack! Isn't that awesome!? Even better, when you finally get him down low, what's this? He generates a shield! Of course! How else can he survive attacks and escape! It's not like he has any ability that allows him to run fast or anything! But with all those powers, he is definately not easy to use! Like the other hooking champion like Thresh, who needs to pull off hook+flay+Ult combo at the right time, Blitzcrank is much much harder to use properlly! He need to land his Q then spam ER!!!!111!!!11!111 Damn! that sure requires some LCS big plays there! In lane, such a balanced champion obviously has tons of counters! Like Sona, a tanky op champion with tons of mobility. That's why riot needs to nerf her! Or Soraka, another super tanky super fast fighter with lots of disengages! Of course, there's the always OP Morgana! She can block Blitzcranks hook! That's so op! While Blitzs Hook takes an eternity of 20 seconds to use again, Morgana's OP siheld only takes 23! That's so unfair for our weak little golem!
Also, that hook takes so much time to charge up, Morg obviously have all the time in the world to use the shield on herself or her ADC! It's not like Thresh with his lightning fast hook! Overall, thank you Riot for making the super balanced steam golem! Without him, I would only have won all of my matches! That is so boring! Whenever I want to lose, our saviour Blitzcrank is here to grant me that wish! Thank you Riot and please never nerf our hard-to-use balanced golem!
Inspired by that post about Morgana's binding and cold coffee
