Does the Kindred kill arbitrarily, or is it predestined?
Do they keep a mental list of which mortals are supposed to die (similar to the Grim Reaper's list or a Death Note), or do they just kill anything they meet?
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This is a big misconception that I see a lot. The Kindred aren't the Grim Reaper, they are LITERALLY death. They're how death is perceived. They don't KILL people, they are omnipresently personifying the death of everything that exists. In the story "Forest for the Trees," found on Kindred's champion page, it tells us that during a battle, "Lamb danced lithely from sword edge to spear tip." This shows us that in the moment that someone dies, Kindred is the thing that kills them.
The Kindred don't kill people, the Kindred are the death that follows the killing. or The Kindred don't kill people, people kill people.
They don't kill people. They are death, like Tatter said. Lamb shooting an arrow through their heart is the metaphorical representation of dying peacefully and having accepted your fate. Wolf tearing them to shreds is the metaphorical representation of dying violently and fighting against your fate.
They appear to those that are about to die because they are the representation of death themselves.
I think you mean like the Grim Reaper, who is a much older concept of a death entity with a list of who's going to die than some anime. And as far as I can tell, Kindred doesn't seem to have any sort of list. They shadow people who deal in death and actively try to kill people who defy their death.