##Champion Concept Review
As requested, he is my feedback on your concept. My review style is and focused on four main things: Kit & kit cohesion, champion intentions versus kit, champion theme vs kit, and would it just work/fit in current LOL. These are aspects of concept design that I resonate with and feel that I can give the best feedback in. Also, prepare for a lot of comparisions.
Basic Information
Name
Cel — I like it. Simple and slightly mysterious. Maybe I have a bias since I like Dragon Ball Z when I was a kid. But hey, it’s cool name. Gives me that Zed, Vi, and Zac feel. I think it fits in league just fine. However, what I call a simple typo is in the tagline for your concept: The Phantom of Bandle City… right? Or The Bandle City Phantom? Either way, the word ‘Phantom is the key operator here and helps me guide the rest of the concept review.
Appearance
Sister of Trist, with red hair? Cool. Is the lightsaber-ish weaponry from that alien crash? That would be cool too. One thing I notice is the descending grip (holding the handle so the point of weapon points down) on the weapon. Also pretty neat as most cutting edge weapon holders hold with an ascending grip. I think: how does this effect range on auto attacks? What new abilities (in terms of attacking/swiping/style/techniques) can be used from this stance? Thematically – Why this stance?
Overall, a good start to leave some creative and unique design features for your concept.
##Abilities
Innate: [cool name here]
Lets see… places a mark that deals bonus damage on next auto attack. Ok, we know this effect itself isn’t originally, but I do like how it is implemented in the whole kit, giving it major cohesion between auto attacking and spell weaving to maximize damage. Now with this passive, and the ‘Phantom’ in the tagline, and not explicating stating it, but my guess it that Cel fills the assassin role. This passive enables that role to be fulfilled.
What is missing is the duration of the mark, which is significant since it can allow different (albeit forced) playstyles for an assassin. For example, having it have a 2.0 second duration kinda forces her to spell weave all attacks and spells in an all in fashion (sorta like Riven). A mark lasting 7.0 seconds allows her to poke, and strike again when they don’t expect it or go into hiding and strike again (think sorta like Rengar). Furthermore, it effects how well the rest of your kit needs to be regarding the passive for maximizing damage. Lastly, it doesn’t state any restrictions so this can proc over and over, which is good for a damage and assassinations. The Bonus AD invites her to be build with some AD input
In terms of damage output, your only other damaging skills are W and E.
Example: So say we are level 18, with an AP-AD hybrid build, 400 AP and 275 AD with 180 Bonus AD, and we are fighting a Nasus for whatever reason. We can fight with an W, E, and Q combo (all rank 5) with auto attacks weaved in between for the passive procs. [W = 260 + 40% AP] + [10% Bonus AD + 10% AP] + [(E = 90 X 4) +50% AP] + [10% Bonus AD + 10% AP] + [Q = 110 +10 Bonus AD] + [10% Bonus AD + 10% AP] <- is granted that the follow up is happening before the duration of the electric shocks are done. As per your passive, the new shocking tick will reapply your passive.
------------------BASE DAMAGE-------------------------BONUS AP %--------------------------BONUS AD %------ + ------AA
Math Time: [260 + 360 + 110] + [160 + 200 + 120 {= 3 bonus auto attacks}] + [72] + 825
---------------------- [730] ------------- +----------------- [480] ------------------- + ---------------- [72] ------- + ---------------- [825]
= 2,107. This is just over the base health of most Marksmen and without counting heals, health regen, armor and magic resist. I say an assassin needs about 3000 – 4000 raw damage to be a consistent assassin machine.
As for the cool name here my suggestion is to call it: Victimizing Strikes. Victimize a skill name I favor for some reason. It sounds cool, huh? No? Maybe…? Anyway, thematically being a phantom-like person means to me: striking from the shadows, unexpected, and never allowing total ability to defend oneself. Which leads me to the next skill…
Q: Phantom Steel
And here we a direct connection to her lore with learning art of avoiding detection. As well as the “requirement” of a gap closer or stealth mechanic for assassins. With the space technology, I can only guess that this is gained from the technology from the downed ship right? Or is it gained from learning the some inner power she learned through her training. This thematically effects the kit since it somewhat implies what skills she can do/do well/can’t do.
As for the skill itself seems balance as it only gains invisibility alone, or deals extra damage when you use a skill prior. The latter portion plays into the balance since an enemy can figure out that the strike is coming a certain direction since you used a prior skill, just not exactly angle. Thin skill shots, say Morgana Q, may miss since you turned invisible and they would have to cast it in scared preparations, or have luck/skill to hit you while you zig zag being invisible.
Spamming invisibility is not fun play against (thank you Vayne) and the cooldown timers allow functional use, but no ability to spam. Cost is fine early, but is so low it’s unimportant for late game, giving her more power at that stage in the game (as per mana regen / cooldown is greater than cost / cooldown).
Gameplay wise and somewhat thematically, I believe you should add that she ignores unit collision while in stealth. How infuriating would it be to be minion blocked while being phantom-like state? That sucks.
The bonus damage seems low on scaling for late game assassinations. The grievous wounds, something I personally associate with assassinations, is great for it. It does add to the ‘not instant burst’ but ‘quick and constant damage output & no escape’. Say, Katerina vs Yi.
And the name… Phantom Steel… is the weapons she holding some new form or steel state of matter? Just wondering where the name fits.
W: Telekinetic Burst
First, to me this signifies that the training she went through increase internal mental power. And maybe some technical tools to aid her, and not fully augment/create powers for her. Cool, and that covers her thematically. How is this ability useful in assassinations? Well skillful placement can create extra distance to safety, knock over walls they don’t wish to be knocked over and displace aid from the target (for example, max range thresh lantern). These are all good reasons to argue having it in the kit. A comparison is Azir’s ultimate, knocking back enemies and creating zone control.
As for the casting mechanic… it is 300 units away from the cursor. I need some clarity. Is it 300 units in the direction Cel is facing or 300 unit aside from where the cursor is? On top of that, you say the range is casted from Self. Basically, it is Syndra knockback or Draven knock aside. From the wording it seems more like Draven. The stun from the mark detonation is a-ok.
E: Chain Lightning
First, i would stick with the telekinetic theme. You can make a lore / kit flow that stems from the telekinetic deception training she received and turn the lighting into telekinetic force. Since you go up to 6 targets it can chain up to, and not bounce back and forth from (say Katarina bouncing blades vs fiddlesticks dark wind) it is not able to bounce back and forth. If it actually a chained ability that has a damage over time component, you should identify a range the lighting can bounce to an enemy within.
The multiple mark removal is a great for balancing this ability. Damage is good. The cooldown feels a bit high. I feel like of you reduced the cool down and damage, keep AP scaling - this can be a defining skill. The blink portion maybe why the CD is kind of high, So I understand. Also, you need to state if this is a secondary cast skill. If it isn't, it seems like you either cast the chain lighting or blink to a marked enemy. It it is – which it should be – it makes sense and creates play making ability.
Range is good. Cost Is good. CD is appropriate. Damage is good. Can tie in thematically with ease and a sentence in your lore. Aides in assassin role. There is balancing efforts, counter play ability with position behind minions. Advantages to skill use. Original in overall concept. Good ability.
R: Combat Reflexes
This is something that I personally wanted to employ in one of my concepts. It just seems difficult to implement. As you have it now, you are basically invulnerable. I do understand that aoe/non single target things get through. But in terms of duration, consider it versus Kayle's ultimate. It seems long. And counters a lot of other ultimates. Although it could be waited out, I think I it needs one further restriction to make it feel more balanced, especially at your stated duration.
##Abilities Overview/Balance
Inate: — A bit more scaling, say adding 5 percent to both Bonus AD and AP puts her in a consistent lethal damage dealing assassin I think she is intended to be.
Q: Phantom Steel— Add that she ignores unit collision while in stealth.
W: Telekinetic Burst — Provide some clarity on the knockback/knock Aside crowd control of the ability. As well as casting paradigm (self versus skill shot). Stun on mark detonation is perfect.
E: Chain Lighting — good overall, just clarify the knock back or knock aside portion.
R: Combat Reflexs — add another restriction, say in 180 degres
only in the direction she is facing or reduce the total duration of the buff.
##Final Thoughts
Is she designed and intended to deadliest in the late game? High CD on all skills, so she is supposed to be high damage single target assassin? No low CD means they better count. Is the CD supposed to be a weakness to the concept to help with balance? What usefulness can she provide while all skills are on CD?
