Boards›[ARCHIVED] Miscellaneous

A lot of champions don't feel like what they are supposed to be.

antymattar·12/4/2015, 11:00:27 AM·1 votes·381 views

And that makes me sad. Lucian doesn't feel like an undead hunter. Nothing in his kit shows that. Plus his theme overlaps with Vayne . Aatrox is as much a bloodthirsty demon of death as Elise is a priestess of a cult. And Mordekaiser... Dont even get me started on Mordekaiser. This guy is supposed to be a walking suit of armor and death. What does his kit have? HE CAN GIVE HIS ALLIES A SPEED BOOST WHEN THEY RUN TOWARDS HIM SO THAT THEY CAN... idk HUG eachother! He should like take over corpses or something(wear them inside?) or something shadow isles-y. Swain is a master tactician who likes to go in balls deep because he can. Yes. Yorick is a gravedigger but he is also a family man for some reason. He doesn't actually dig graves. Velkoz is a dude from the void who is supposed to only be able to observe things by incinerating them, but he also sometimes makes bubbles on the ground that knock people up and sometimes he makes earthquakes. Only his ult and basic attacks actually use the incinerator lasers. Irelia is... what even is she?! Did you know that, according to the lore, she is technically undead? Yes. She's a complete mess theme-wise. Leblanc is not a deceiver, she is a botheration. I'm not saying this because she is annoying to play against(I find her to be less and less annoying as time goes on) but because almost nothing in her kit is actually deceiving. Sure, she has her passive and her W, but that's like calling Yasuo "The windwaller". Evelynn... Evelynn ... So at some point someone at riot was like "Let's make a scantily clad dominatrix who runs around the field and like shoots spikes out of her heels and when you get in her face she slaps you twice really fast..." and someone said "Yes but what if she was called the widowmaker?" and from that day on Riot started making mandatory hormone regulation checks. Zilean is not a chrono mage, If Zilean is a chrono mage, then everyone is a chrono mage, cus everyone can go FORWARDS in time. There's nothing magical about it. This is like some trifecta of missunderstandings. Zilean should have Ekko 's ult but like global where he rewinds time a bit and Yorick should have Zilean ult where he revives fallen champs by unearthing their bodies and Ekko should seriously consider a career in professional baseball. Riot's understanding of zoology is also outstanding. Skarner is not a scorpion. Scorpions sting. Skarner is a tow-truck. He is a tow-truck that summons five rocks.

I'm not 100% serious. I'm just being sarcastic about some of the incoherent things I find funny in League. ;)

3 Comments

Fjiordor12/4/2015, 2:12:11 PM1 votes

since when is irelia supposed to be undead? She only got healed by an soraka r (which is totally common these days.

The Ionians have developed some of the most breathtaking and deadly martial arts on all of Runeterra - just one manifestation of their pursuit of enlightenment. The most remarkable blade style to emerge, however, was the unusual byproduct of foreign intervention. Master Lito was a swordsman whose teachings were sought by ruling classes from nearly every city-state. His art was a highly-guarded secret, but it was said that swords would breathe in his grasp. He withered unexpectedly from a mysterious disease which baffled the brightest of Runeterran physicians. When he died, he left behind Zelos and Irelia, his son and daughter, and a truly unique weapon. Zelos became a sergeant in the Ionian military and left to seek assistance from Demacia immediately prior to Noxus' invasion of Ionia. Irelia, charged with the protection of their home until Zelos returned, was alone when the Noxian forces struck. The Ionians fought admirably, but soon Ionian blood stained the land beneath the prints of foreign boots. At the Great Stand of the Placidium, Ionians prepared for surrender, but were inspired to maintain their resistance when the young Irelia lifted her father's enormous blade and pledged to hold until her brother returned. In the chaos of the ensuing fight, Irelia was cursed with dark Noxian Necromancy. As her life ebbed, Soraka, the Starchild, made a final attempt to anchor her fading soul. Unwilling to relinquish her home, Irelia rose at the brink of death, and her father's sword lifted in the air alongside her. Irelia rushed back to the fore, unfazed by the blade's sudden animation. The weapon danced around her effortlessly, cutting down Noxians as they gaped in horror. The decimated invaders were forced to retreat from the Placidium. Irelia was appointed Ionia's Captain of the Guard, and when the defense of her homeland moved to the Fields of Justice, so did she. 'The sword flourishes, as though painting with blood.' -- Taken from a Noxian Field Report