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Scuttle crab is not innocent!

Potato Doc·5/9/2015, 6:19:12 PM·24 votes·2,588 views

Every so often we see the quote "Scuttle crab is innocent", for the most part I agreed with people on this, but I never really cared too much. It wasnt something that I felt was necessary.

However today it took a turn for the worst.

I was playing trundle when I noticed something off. If the scuttle crab is so innocent as people say then he should have nothing to hide. But where is better then hiding something in plain sight? I suddenly see the little guy has an attack damage of 36 (applied after trundles Q). At the moment it bugged me but I tried to brush it off. Its just the scuttle crab right? It means no harm, im just asking it for its vision. However, it is always those we least suspect who surprise us in the most.

I was running from the enemy team, they were hot on my tail, suddenly i flash backwards towards them into the small tuff of river brush near baron. They all walk by me. Relieved I quickly begin to recall. I open the shop realizing im dead if they find me anyways since i had barely evaded death with 10 hp. Then my screen turns grey. I look at the mini-map to see who killed me. But the entire enemy team was at dragon. Looking at my body I see the small scuttle crab teabagging my body.

I hope this is enough to show the scuttle crab isnt innocent. Maybe he used to be and the experience on the rift changed him in like manner to teemo, or maybe he was just a conniving murderer all along, just waiting for that secret moment. But I know his secret.

Scuttle crab OP

19 Comments

Vicvictorw5/9/2015, 6:24:52 PM30 votes

http://33.media.tumblr.com/4e8957687bbccaa1c838090dfb35a0e2/tumblr_nhbvn6cqhH1sdk5d7o1_1280.gif

Dr Poro5/9/2015, 8:44:32 PM3 votes

There must have been someone with a global ult or someone MIA.

I can't believe Scuttle would do something like this. He's the second most friendly creature in the game (after poros of course).

Maple Crusader5/10/2015, 5:34:07 AM3 votes

CRAB BATTLE.

SleepyLionCub5/11/2015, 1:51:00 PM2 votes

He sacrifices his health to clear the teemo mushrooms that fill the upper river.

He is a hero.

YqD1frvNYl5/10/2015, 3:56:02 AM1 votes

Young Skudz is a thug.

InfinityAwaits5/10/2015, 4:37:14 AM1 votes

I vote we petition Rito to nerf Skuttle. Too Op.

The Lexer5/10/2015, 6:40:15 PM1 votes

This brings up a good point, not about whether or not scuttler is innocent but why does scuttle crab have attack damage?

SSSSUNSSS5/10/2015, 6:49:05 PM1 votes

mr. krabs greedy and OP Urgot

Hyrum Graff5/11/2015, 2:08:14 PM1 votes

So, I'm aware that this may constitute overreacting that will cause me to lose all credibility, but I have to jump in here to address this:

{quoted}

If he is so innocent as people say then he should have nothing to hide.

This is a flawed argument often used to defend mass surveillance. There are many problems with it, but in my opinion the two most important are these (read/watch the links for others):

The things you want secret, you might not yet realize you want secret, because you don't know what things make you a target for governments (and corporations). Like being a part of the civil rights movement.
You should bend or break the law, when you feel it is unjust, because it's impossible to know the truth of something if you've never seen it (because it's illegal). Take gay marriage, or marijuana legalization (or an issue of your choice that is illegal but shouldn't be, these are just examples) -- if nobody ever did these things illegally, you'd have no way to disprove people who claim that gay marriage will destroy the concept of marriage, or those who claim marijuana is worse than tobacco.

I'm trying to keep this reasonably short, so if this isn't convincing but you're interested, I strongly encourage you to check out all the links in this post.

http://www.thoughtcrime.org/blog/we-should-all-have-something-to-hide/

http://www.ted.com/talks/glenn_greenwald_why_privacy_matters?language=en

Byakuya Kuchiki5/9/2015, 8:35:11 PM1 votes

so what did kill you

Davy Crockett5/9/2015, 9:52:16 PM1 votes

Sunfire?

IGotScuttleCrabs5/9/2015, 11:53:39 PM1 votes

Can confirm. Scuttle crabs are annoying little bastards burrowing in and hiding making you feel like you're free of them. Truth is once you have one. Everyone can see it.