Every Single LOL Champ in a Nutshell

Every LOL champ in a nutshell. Jokes may or may not be included.

- The supposed embodiment of war. Is almost useless in a game of League. - Anime weaboo paradise. - You have a thing for Zed, don't you? - Everyone calls me "The Cow". - Your ult is the reason you have no friends. - You thought you could trade kills, but jokes on you, I have an egg! - The most mechanically difficult champion to play. Do you know how hard it is to throw that huge AoE stun on people? - Infinite slows. Too bad Kalista stole your crown as the kiting queen. - I talk about two things: myself and how I'm better than you. But then I get killed by some rat thing with a blowgun. - One patch was all it took to turn the eagle into the pidgeon. - "Who wants an AoE Zhonya's to ruin combos?!" - The Booty-Grabber 9000. - Nobody in Bronze takes into account that your ult bounces. - Pringles Man, is that you? - You Flash away from her at low HP. Then hit a Snap Trap hidden in a bush and die to a 1000 Dmg crit. - 1000 Degree Knife vs (Top Laner name here) - First poison. Then E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E - Still waiting for that Godzilla skin. - You're nothing but a W H I S K E Y D E L T A - Hah, you thought you could survive the dunk, but you bled to death! - Heretic. - Me Mundo. Me no die. Me have infinte Health regen. - The best thing about Draven is that Draven is Draven. And that Death's Dance makes me unkillable. - The burst AP midlaner's worst nightmare: The Get Out of Death Free card. - What anime is this, again? -Control Wards for everyone! - STOP. POKING. ME. -I'm still waiting for the fear to be over. - Her sword sheath is a baguette. - I hate you. Die. - Figuratively and literally a brick wall. - You thought you could get away? Nope! Ult from across the map! - Spin to win. - You think he's so cute. Until goes into Hulk mode and CC locks you. - Remember when you could one-shot almost everyone with full AP? Yeah, those were the good days. - He was released as an ADC. Now everyone Jungles with him. - GOTTA GO FAST. - ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ raise your dongers ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ - Hentai. - How much lifesteal do you have?! - The Tree Pedophile himself. Also very annoying when you stay at lvl 3 for 15 minutes because of him. - I get tons of First Bloods. Like the most. - The host of the official LoL Fight Club. - 6 Triforce Build for the win! -A hammer that also functions as a sniper rifle. - So satisfying... seriously. If you haven't played him, he's so satisfying to play. Like when your 4th bullet instakills a squishy. - Get Excited! Get a Pentakill! - LMAO they made trust issues into a real champion. - So I guess peace is rooting enemies to the ground so they die? - About as non-meta as you can get. - Remember when you had a 99% ban rate? Yeah, those were the times... - Little miss Pentakill. - You need to be invincible so you don't die? Too bad I'm only using this on myself. - Has a really, really, really, bad bipolar disorder. Seriously, I think that scythe is doing something. - A silent death is not when you CC lock someone with literal lightning. - Could kill anything, except a cat. - Wait, so death can die? - Drunk, insane, dumb, and likes tacos. What more could you ask for? - viciously right clicks - Yeah, I'm pretty sure you chased the clone. - Why does Teemo's Q work on you? - You forgot the "t" in "stun", Riot. - A Zhonya's that heals and slows? Nice! - You gave the first black champ a driveby ult. Nice job. - Everything about you screams annoying. - Make sure to spam the laugh button when playing her whenever you can! - Malphite rock. Malphite big. Malphite knockup enite enemy team. - The Assassin's worst nightmare. - Making facechecking a bush more dangerous than it already is. - Kind of like a melee Vayne: Toxic and gets lots of 1v5 Pentakills. - ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) - Although you are undying, you died from meta. - Her Q can get you reported for being AFK. -Any chance you know where Atlantis is? - Stacks. Stacks. Nothing matters but stacks. - Taking "Tank Meta" to a new level. - One spear is all it takes. - Noc noc, who's there? Not you, because he just ulted you. - Hey, ever wanted TWO Smites? - Not to be confused to the snowman. - Sorry, the Ball doesn't like towers, so he ignores them. - One day, you'll be able to bake bread to your heart's content. - Remember when you were "Poopy"? - Bot Lane: Takes a good amount of skill. Top Lane: A quadriplegic could play you. - Everyone thought he was gonna be this super lovey romance dude. We're glad he isn't. ok. I'm a girl! A GIRL! I'm either super OP or trash, but you'll always hate me. The knife cat himself, making sure the ADC never scales up. More toxicity than a toxic waste dump. The Equalizer sure makes the battle unequal. How many versions have you had? Four or five? Eh, you'll just get reworked later anyway. - Sorry, You can't move. - No. - Instead of killing him, how about I give a shield the size of a truck to him? - What anime is this again? -running around at the speed of sound - "COOOOOOWAAAARDS" is what he says when he ults to run away. - More addicted to gold than Wario. - Why are there so many towers for one champion?! - How to make the entire enemy team hate you because you can mash Q W and E. - Heal me, goat! - Bird is the word. -Step 1. Throw Q's. Step 2. Ult. -How to kill your own teammates. And have two health bars. - Have fun picking me in free rotation. - Why do you have a knife cape if you don't use it? -I think this explains you the best. - S A T A N. The one who basks in your blood. The one who never lets you live. The one who makes your autos useless. It is the one. - A wife stealer and a hooker. - Wipe that smug grin off your face, Teemo lover. - No, that's MY armor! - I WILL tower dive you. And I WILL never die. - You would never know how long 2 seconds is. - Hey, remember when Sunfire Cape stacked? - The Melee Kog'Maw. - The most brutal MOBA execution. - Is your bow a Darkin? You're still super edgy though. -It's all fun and games until she gets a 1v5 Pentakill. - My ears bleed after hearing your voice. - Untouched by patches ever since his release. Just as I like it. -Taking "Fisting" WAY too literally. - In Soviet Russia, Viktor plays you! - The Blood Bank's worst nightmare. - You know you screwed up when he suddenly has Mundo's HP regen. - HP regen out of this world. And ultra tanky. - Yeah, that's the clone, isn't it. - No matter what you do, you're going to be in front of a feather. - League's official magic sniper rifle. - Press R to heal all HP and get a free kill on the person you just knocked up. - The supreme edgelord himself. - I won't kill you. I'll let tortured souls do it for me! - I don't need to build damage to give you a bad time. - Combos so fast you literally won't know what hit you. - insert bomb joke here - Making sure that idiot ADC won't die since the game's release. - Just your looks raises the age rating.