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Update from riot HQ 5/19/2017

YOUGOTKILLEDBRO·5/19/2017, 10:52:21 PM·2 votes·303 views

We have gotten a lot of criticism over the past few days, from the gameplay boards about 2 of our most beloved champions, Yasuo and LeeSin . Yasuo is our favorite champion for a few reasons. He is awesome, a regenerating shield, a knockup, a super cool ult, an all blocking wall, and a very unique dash. He is been called "cancerous" and "toxic" and many other things from our community. By popular demand, we have decided to buff him. He will now have a third passive, that is called, chemotherapy. This passive will kill any other "cancerous" champion that comes near him. This is definitely not op, and will make yasuo 10 times more weak. Instead of reworking urgot, we have decided to rework lee sin. We have changed his name To Lee Norris, because It is more fitting for what he can do. He now has a new ult called mega kick, which knocks everyone into the void and kills them. We think lee will still be a horrible champion, and might have to buff him soon.

Thanks for your feedback!

-Riot TSM player69!

1 Comments

The JigSAW5/20/2017, 3:09:05 PM1 votes

At Non-Riot Games we like to make sure each of you has diverse and fun experience in game. From our quality esports content that we certainly are not trying to force on any of you (WATCH ESPORTS NOW) to our diverse champion balance testing team and mostly broken AI player moderation team (THIS IS A GOOD TIME TO SPEND MONEY ON PRO TEAMS NOW.) we enjoy giving the people what they we want, and as such we have read many posts in reaction to Comrade Player69's posting before they were unfortunately deleted by accident.

Firstly, we'd like to announce our grand client is still undergoing bug screening and we fully expect it to be running perfectly within, say, 6 years or so. After all, waiting 10 minutes for the post game screen and forcing a mandatory upgrade to toaster users is not a bad thing, it gives you time to reflect on SPENDING LOTS OF MONEY ON OUR PRO TEAMS NOW. We have many new real money icons and skins coming, although we may have to raise the prices by just a bit due to unrelated and unforeseen maintenance costs. This is also a good time to stock up on LOL ESPORTS merchandise and LEARN 2 PRO OR GO HOME. After all, we balance all champions according to what a few people in pro circuit tell us to do.

On careful reflection of the change to our favorite champion Yasuo we have decided to make a fourth passive as well.

Big Red Button: Randomly during a game, Yasuo will have a big red button icon appear over his abilities. By pressing it, he gets an instant pentakill.

Everybody loves buttons after all.

Also, due to the exceptionally weak laning phase of MasterYi XinZhao Tryndamere we are going to give them 100% crit and 100 bonus AD until level 11. This should help phase out their underperforming stats.

Also, enjoy the next few rotating game modes: Legend of the Poro Monarch, Legend of the Poro Head of State, Legend of the Poro Oligarch, Ascension 2: Electric Boogaloo (still xerath just different skin) and All Random Legend of the Poro Prime Minister. REMEMBER TO BUY PRO MERCHANDISE SO YOU CAN PRO.

Non-Rioter Comrade Burov