When last pick top lane complains about no tanks

9kPluzZ·Feb 1, 2016·39 votes·2,181 views

"wtf, no tanks GG"

http://cdn.meme.am/instances/500x/12215635.jpg

20 Comments

IcyPepperFeb 1, 201612 votes

If you don't want to be forced to play a tank, just ask before it's too late ;~;

Yeah, that jungler might want to play Master Yi, but they might be willing to take someone else if. You. Just. Ask.

9kPluzZFeb 1, 201613 votes

Not possible. Bronzeys are hellbent on playing their shitty mains, no matter the cost.

Only Play DariusFeb 1, 20168 votes

I still don't understand why Bronze5 is hell bent on playing the shittiest possible champions. I would always see Teemo , Olaf , DrMundo (before any of his buffs) as if they were perma-FOTM.

ESPECIALLY Teemo. I would see that prick 9 out of every 10 ranked games I played down there, in every lane imagineable, and failing in each one. Then again he's low skill high damage, no need for actual trading mechanics, and the people who can't carry themselves out of B5 probably have their fun by sucking it out from someone else's game instead.

9kPluzZFeb 1, 20167 votes

I find it hilarious how many teemos get rekt by nasus. Teemo: "wtf is this wither, so op" 0/9/1

Only Play DariusFeb 1, 20166 votes

"OMG Spectre's Cowl/mercs so broken I can't poke Nasus out of lane anymore!"

Maybe if you could collect 95% CS like you're expected to in a ranged vs melee matchup (as opposed to your disgraceful 40CS at 10min) then you would be able to keep up with his build

Comrade NapoleonFeb 2, 20161 votes

twitch.tv go watch how a lot of jungle main streamers (+diamond) pick their main (cowsmeb picks yi, shaclone and pink ward pick shaco, etc..) or whatever they feel like regardless of their team comb or what they suggest. still they win and climb.

DrehirthFeb 1, 20162 votes

lol https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZqL5ZtTFTyY

EvilRabbittFeb 2, 20161 votes

Reason I never pick who I'm going to pick. Got support, showed Caitlyn. Game went poorly of course, but still was interesting.

Only Play DariusFeb 1, 201610 votes

Oh I love when people pick off-meta toplaners and then cry when they get shit on like it's everyone elses fault.

Elise I'm going Elise top

Rengar (Me) Don't pick Elise into Garen...

Elise I know what i'm doing smd

Rengar Please don't

Elise gives first two kills of the game before I finish my first clear and continuously runs OOM trying to keep Garen off tower

Elise /all GG Trash jungler please report

Rengar I told you not to pick a squishy jungler toplane..

Elise I would have been just fine if you camped me

Some people have no idea why you pick certain types of champions toplane

WutsKrakenFeb 1, 20162 votes

The real question is...

How did Elise get rekt by Garen so easily when everything in her kit is anti-Garen

Only Play DariusFeb 1, 20163 votes

It really isn't. Low base HP so she gets shredded by judgement. Base damage on human Q got slashed so she can't poke him effectively early game. Not tanky enough to survive a gank and no escape. Horrible wave clear and ridiculous mana consumption in a lane where you can't back at your leisure and don't have access to blue buff. Beefy enough to laugh off Elise's entire combo, especially if he has quick reaction and hits W before the stun hits. No scaling MR so Garen can 75-0 her the moment he hits 6. Falls off late game but can't roam effectively from top to help snowball like she does when jungling.

WutsKrakenFeb 1, 20163 votes

If Elise is spamming Q and W nonstop she's doing it wrong. If she's building squishy, she's doing it REALLY wrong

You build top Elise as a bruiser but you need to watch your mana, you only throw a Q out here and there to stop his passive, not necessarily to kill him until item 3110 or item 3025 . When he's down to about 40% is when you can combo him down

Only Play DariusFeb 1, 20161 votes

So build her like a generic bruiser except with severe mana problems? Why pick Elise when there are other champions who will fill that role but better suited for top lane? Why actively make the game harder then it needs to be? If you have something to prove then do it in normals, not in ranked.

And Elise is Zyra levels of squishy, early game she kept getting killed under turret while Garen just shrugged off the turret shots like an actual toplaner often does. Nothing Elise could do about that, but I don't care, she let that happen to herself

WutsKrakenFeb 1, 20161 votes

So one bad Elise means that she's bad as a top laner? It sounds like you're just hella salty that you got a bad Elise who fed a Garen...which is really sad...

Elise is NOT Zyra level squishy, she's basically got the same base stats of Quinn and Jayce who are other ranged tops that Garen hates. Hell, she's actually got BETTER base stats than TEEMO (aka Satan and Garen's most infamous counter). Looking at mana costs compared to base mana, Elise, Jayce and Quinn break pretty even. Garen's only chance against Elise top lane is if he manages to get 2 kills and can snowball the lane. This only occurs if:

Elise is really bad, spams spells in human form, runs oom, takes minion damage while trying to overharass and gets rekt when she runs oom, she pushes so aggressively that she gets ganked for free, and/or foolishly towerdives Garen.

Not necessarily all of them but if your Elise got rekt that badly she must've done at least 3 of these things

Otherwise, Garen will have to accept he will lose CS and needs to look to gank elsewhere and hope to take his advantage back to fight Elise

As Elise, all she has to do is farm and occasionally chuck out an AA-Q-AA combo to stop his sustain. Spamming spells will make her run oom very quickly, much like how Jayce spamming his spells runs him oom. With item 3025 which is CHEAPER than item 3065 or item 3071 (Garen needs at least 1 of these 2 items to finally have a chance at killing Elise) she can keep pressuring and kiting the poor bastard and eventually kill him

Regardless, my point wasn't whether or not Elise top was good or bad, my point was that Garen shouldn't dumpster her because her kit is good for dealing with bruisers like Garen. Elise is played more as a jungler because she's got a strong ganking kit, it's just like playing Udyr top, it works and is a really scary surprise for certain champs, plus they get the benefit of more gold via lane farm its just that their kit is overall better in the jungle

Yes yes yes, I know you'll probably make a bunch of counterarguments of why that Elise fed the Garen and can pull out all sorts of numbers, but the fact stands that you got a bad Elise and shouldn't judge top lane Elise so harshly just because of one

/superlongrantdefendinganoffmetapickthatonepersonfedwith

Only Play DariusFeb 1, 20161 votes

Jayce gets scaling MR and armor in hammer form and has mana restoration in his kit. He is far more suited to top lane than Elise.

As far as laning is concerned, Quinn actually is worse top now than before (good riddance). She lost her blind and can no longer use her ult to escape ganks or losing fights. All she really does is farm until 6 then assassinate other lanes.

That being said you have been making fair points about Elise top, I just personally have never seen anything good come from it. Maybe I am a bit salty, but hey she had the balls to blame me for her losing lane because I didn't babysit her in a lane where you are expected to take care of yourself for most of the game. And losing a ranked game because 7/0 Garen walks through your team while 1/9 Elise says it's your fault, well it's not pleasant

WutsKrakenFeb 2, 20162 votes

So, typical bad laner blaming their jungler. Nothing new, no need to blame the champ just because of one baddie

That's like saying Graves is a trash tier jungler because one guy tried to play him jungle and fed horribly when the truth is he's got one of the highest jungle winrates now

Just Blame JennyFeb 1, 20167 votes

Pfft, Elise can be built fairly tanky.

But yeah. If you're in normals, and really want that Teemo top pick, then go ahead, but don't complain when your squishy team loses every team fight.

If you're playing ranked, then please, please learn to play multiple champions for any role you main, and ensure they serve distinct functions. You're really, really wild about pure-damage MasterYi jungle? Great! But please ensure you've champions to fill other niches, such as Elise LeeSin if you need a stronger early game, or Amumu Shyvana if you need a stronger front line. And for goodness' sake, if your main is a straight up assassin, then please don't make all your alts squishy assassins, too.

9kPluzZFeb 1, 20161 votes

Agreed

EnrovyFeb 2, 20161 votes

tbh I had only two thing I learned that would apply to most bronze games: play tanks+tons of cc=gg, most cases.like what can people really do when 3.5 huge ass tanks running at them with them being either squishy or not enough damage? tanks would win the fight eventually, since half of them dont know how to kite well.