The Tribunal. Reports against the champions of Summoner's Rift.
The following is Sentinel's report to the tribunal regarding the champions of Summoners Rift.
http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : I am here in answer to the summons of the Tribunal in regards to the reports issued against the champions.
Tribunal: You may proceed Sentinel.
http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : Very well, the reports are as follows,
The following are the champions whom have reports against them and those whom have already been arrested for said reports.
: Is accused of draining his victims of their blood and using said blood to restore his own life force. Champion is difficult to find as he seems to only appear in large conflicts to aid the losing side. Recommended Wardens be dispatched upon locating him, with instructions to capture him if possible, and eliminate if necessary. Below is a law enforcement sketch drawing of what the champion is believed to look like.
https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s320x320/e35/11336338_255921591406852_576384260_n.jpg?ig_cache_key=MTIwNDcwMzIwODc0MDA2NjM1Mg%3D%3D.2
: Has been found to seduce men and absorb their essence to slowly become human. However she show remorse for her actions and we may be able to redeem her. Below is a memory extracted from one of her slain victims. Sentinels are on the lookout for her.
https://49.media.tumblr.com/cfd9b20791c49c66ba1313c6fba3ccde/tumblr_mzhifzOxTo1stmjkwo1_500.gif
: Akali has been found to murder numerous people in the name of balance. Her whereabouts are currently unknown.
: Champion Alistar has been found charging forward with an unbreakable will to trample, pulverize, and headbutt people, all while shouting "You can't milk those!"
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/vkvT1B9Lg20/hqdefault.jpg
: Has been found to create large ice storms and attempting to freeze people solid. Recommended we bring bird seed as bait when we try to capture her.
: Annie Hastur was discovered to be attacking people with fire magic and setting loose a large shadow bear upon them whilst they were stunned. The child's parents could not be contacted and we have her detained and have separated her from her bear for the time being.
: Reported to have used people for target practice. A Sentinel attempted to apprehend her, however when he gave chase she shot a massive crystal arrow, hitting him in the knee. Sentinel is now performing guard duty, as he is no longer fit to adventure out in the field.
: It was discovered that this champion was the one responsible the destruction of an entire mountain range some thousands of years ago. However his whereabouts are currently unknown. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : How are we supposed to take this guy in when, or if, we find him? He's practically a god!)
: Was found to command a army of sand warriors to harass and torment a group of children at the local school. Reportedly because they had a sandbox and he wanted it.
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/4c/25/80/4c258084c731e7d963b88ebb5b1d42bd.jpg
: Champion Bard has been found to take people on "magical journeys" which inevitably led ambushes by other champions. Has also been observed abandoning champions to wander about collecting wind chimes. When victims were questioned they responded,
https://img.ifcdn.com/images/cacfb6fba8b53afbbd043f0ce95e0c0631345359d467853dee145a0c81a0dd9b_1.jpg
: Accused of causing severe blunt force trauma, whiplash, and electrocution. Target is difficult to get close to as a Static Field is continually generating lightning around him.
: Discovered to have been incinerating people. Has been observed occasionally dressing up like a zombie and chasing women.
https://media.giphy.com/media/8XR85OUxW95Qs/giphy.gif
: Reported as having slammed a door into peoples faces repeatedly. He is also reported as having carried this door around with him wherever he goes.
: Is also reported to have used people for target practice. Also for baiting said people onto what appears to be a yordle trap by placing a cupcake on said trap. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : One Sentinel was injured attempting to disarm one of the traps we have found.)
: Was found to not only poison people on a repeated basis, but also turn them into stone, albeit temporarily.
Cho'Gath has been found devouring people whole in effort to grow in size.
Accused of covering other champions in burning phosphorus and shooting missile randomly at them.
: Was found attempting to cleave a person in two. When cornered for questioning he proceeded to viciously hemorrhage several sentinels before shouting "NOXUS!!" and tripping over himself in an attempt at a spinning attack.
: Diana was recently stopped from using the child as a sacrifice to the moon. Upon trying to detain her, she went into a rampage and killed several sentinels. See attached image.
http://elohell.net/public/comments/original/462d8b7d17df1a554e66939e55543d1e.jpg
Sentinels were called in to apprehend the suspect when reportedly a security guard informed him that he could not go into a restricted area. Mundo reportedly was throwing cleavers at the guard while shouting "Mundo go where he pleases!"
: Detained for questioning, but due to public outcry was released before any information could be obtained of the matter.
: While champion Ekko has not been suspected of any crimes, his ability to rewind time allows him to commit any crime he wishes without ever fear of being caught. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : I believe we need to take away that device of his. Who knows what atrocities he has committed and gotten away with?)
Elise has a warrant for arrest as she has been discovered as a leader to a secret cult. None of the cultists could be questioned as they do not return from the shadow isles where they commit their rituals. A Sentinel has joined the cult as a mole and is heading out now to discover what the cult is actually doing on the shadow isles.
: We do not know exactly what Evelynn has done as the victims refuse to speak of it. Sentinels are currently on the lookout for her. However she always vanishes whenever she manages to gain enough distance from pursuers.
: Ezreal is reported as experimenting with several artifacts on random citizens. He has been detained and all artifacts removed from his person for study.
: Wanted for deep psychological damage to farmers when they tried to enter their corn fields.
: Reported to have been using people against their wills to practice parrying attacks. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : A sentinel attempted to pepper-spray her, but she parried it. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT WORK?!?)
: This squid. . .fish. . .thing. . .has been found attempting to feed people to his land shark. Sentinels sent scouts to his home in attempt to ask for aid in capturing him, but found the city abandoned.
: Has been reported for battering young women with strong winds. He claims he was only trying to cool them off. It was in the middle of winter.
: Gangplank was last seen chasing after people while shouting, "I'm coming for dat booty land lubber!" (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : As he is a pirate I am tempted to believe he is talking about gold. However the specific words he used, in combination to the fact the victims were female, leave me worried about his actual intent.)
: Garen was located for questioning. However upon being questioned, he immediately screamed, "FOR DEMACIA!!" before spinning like a lunatic and leaving a trail of injured minions in his wake. All minions injured in the incident were promptly treated and escorted back to their families, for a minor fee of course.
: Gnar was reported as trying to steal a child's stuffed toy. When she wouldn't let him have it, he then erupted into a rage and tossed a boulder twice the child's size at her.
: Was found tossing barrels of wine, ale, and beer at people in attempt to get them drunk.
: Graves was found to be shooting in pursuit of another champion. Upon attempting to apprehend him, he tossed down a smoke grenade and made his escape. We are currently searching for him now. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : He's gotten a lot faster since he quit smoking.)
: Hecarim was reported as having chased someone through the jungle, across the river, and beyond in an attempt to trample them. When we attempted to capture him he made his escape in the amusement park. We lost sight of him somewhere around the merry-go-round.
: Heimerdinger was found trying out new turret designs with various animals as test targets. If the animals were not his neighbor's pets, we would have looked the other way.
: Illaoi has been witnessed pulling the soul from a person's body before assaulting it with a multitude of tentacles. While the person's body was left untouched by the onslaught, her soul will never be the same.
: Wanted for attempted impalement of another champion. Upon attempt to capture her, she used her blades like a skateboard and flew away before she could be apprehended. Word has been sent to inform her family of this event, however her brother being her only family, has not returned home yet to receive word.
: Janna has been spotted conjuring tornadoes to bounce people in the air. While more a nuisance than anything law breaking, it cannot be aloud to continue.
: Jarvan IV was found to seal people in an arena with himself and challenge them to a battle to the death. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : The prince himself is committing crimes?!?)
: Has been found to have repeatedly whomped a child upside the head with a lamp pole. Upon questioning he responded, "Imagine if I had a real weapon!" Jax has been detained until further notice.
: Jayce is accused of shouting, "IT'S HAMMER TIME!" before attempting to smash people with his transforming hammer.
: Jhin is accused of trying to make people beautiful. Upon further investigation it has been found that this champion murders people in the name of his work, leaving them in grotesque displays of what he calls art. Sentinels were unable to apprehend him and had to retreat as he began laying down sniper fire upon the approaching Sentinels, preventing any advance towards his position.
: Jinx has an active arrest warrant for a multitude of crimes and the list is growing. The last encounter ended with Jinx stating, "You think I'm crazy? You should see my sister!" before she hopped on he rocket launcher and blasted off.
: Found attempting to force a person into contracting his soul to her in exchange for revenge. She is currently under careful watch and the man is being kept away from her. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : Can we even do anything about this one? She is a ghost after all.)
: Karma was detained for questioning. However the only thing we could get out of her was, "Karma's a bitch isn't it?"
: Karthus could not be located for questioning. He is presumed dead and thus no law applies to him. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : I really believe that we need to fix this thing about laws not applying to the dead.)
: Kassadin was located for questioning. However once we got there we found him in battle with a swarm of voidlings from a recently opened rift. Sentinels aided in pushing back the creatures, however Kassadin followed them into the portal before it closed, and thus could not be questioned.
: Katarina is a known assassin of Noxus and has evaded several attempts at capture. The last attempt ended with her killing five Sentinels before making her escape, while saying, "Easy penta!" while running.
: Found attempting to kill several people in claims that it was for the sake of order.
: Could not be detained for questioning.
: Kha'zix was found hunting people in attempt to eat them and evolve into a more powerful creature.
: There is no actual confirmation of this champion's existence. It is merely a story that has been passed down through the ages. The child's claims of it threatening to shoot her will arrows or rip her from limb to limb are merely nightmares brought about from those stories. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : I'm glad we aren't looking into this one anymore. I've started seeing Lamb and Wolf everywhere I go.)
: Kled has been reported for attacking people in claims of them trespassing on his land. It is unclear yet is Kled is indeed a real person or just a meme cooked up by the lower ranks of the Noxian military. The following poster has been linked to Kled and is believed to be of some importance.
https://img.ifcdn.com/images/cac7c5dbb0cefb0d04ac48d823d1b038400878fadc43e46858a00eb5e5fe8c30_1.jpg
: Thwarted from his attempts to eat a mother and her child. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : What is it with these creatures and trying to eat people?)
: Upon attempting to question her, we found we had in truth detained a fake. She is currently being tracked down.
: Lee sin was detained and questioned. However he was released for lack of evidence and his statement of, "I'm blind, how could I even find someone to hit them?"
: Leona is accuse of bombarding the several people with solar radiation, (sunlight) and the victims are currently undergoing tests for skin cancer.
: Wanted for attempting to seal the child in a tomb of black ice. Proving difficult to capture.
: Was detained for questioning, but released shortly after do to public outcries of racism and profiling him for being black.
: Lulu has been reported as repeatedly turning other children into squirrels. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : This is not the first time Lulu has been reported for this kind of conduct. Why has she not been arrested yet? And can we even charge her as an adult?)
: Was detained briefly but lack of evidence called for a release. Later found attempting to vaporize a Noxian citizen while laughing. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : By the heavens how do we make her stop laughing?!)
: Tracked to a query but could not be found amongst the other mountains of stone.
: Malzahar has been found guilty of spreading "space aids" to anyone not following his cult. He has been detained until further notice.
: Tracked to the Twisted Treeline. The trail ran cold however as he could not be distinguished from the other trees.
: Could not be detained for questioning. Our Ionian branch is currently on the look out for him.
: Was questioned but could not be detained. She walked out the door saying, "Fortune doesn't favor fools."
: Do to him being dead, no law applies to him, and thus could not be detained. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : Seriously! We need to fix this!)
: Morgana was found attempting to force feed orphaned children burnt cupcakes. The cupcakes have been seized and are now being held in a bio-hazard container as evidence.
: Attempted to lead children to the bottom of the sea. She swears she just wanted to take them to an underwater musical.
: Found attempting to build stacks on his Syphoning Strike by using various people in the market place.
: Nautilus has been witnessed throwing as anchor at a random sailor. The sailor only managed to get away because his diving suit slowed him down. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : I have to wonder what he looks like under that suit.)
: When questioned regarding her motives, she stated, "It was mating season." Nidalee is currently being held in isolation until we can be sure of exactly what she did.
: Found repeatedly giving people nightmares. We still do not know the reasons for him doing so.
: Attempted to feed another champion to his Yeti.
: Arrested for flying into a rage and tossing axes at random people. Proven very hard to take down.
: Oriana apparently wanted to see what the inside of a real human girl looked like. She has been detained until we can figure out what to do with her. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : Do we have laws that apply to dolls?)
: Could not be detained. Shows interest in baking.
: Could not be questioned due to Diplomatic Immunity.
: When approached her bird flew down and picked her up before flying away. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : We should have brought a hunter to shoot them down.)
: When questioned he simply stated, "OK."
: The beast could not be contained. A number of Sentinels were lost to this creature and we were forced to retreat from the Shuriman desert.
: Has been reported roaming the sands of Shurima killing anyone he comes upon, all the while screaming, "BROTHER! I WILL FIND YOU!"
: States he was only hunting. Subject was apprehended and the families of the dead were notified.
: Riven could not be detained for questioning. Upon trying the marketplace was reduced to craters and demolished shops and food stands. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : The way she hops around I can almost see her in a bunny suit. . . .)
: Apparently wanted to try out his modified flamethrower on a live target.
: When questioned he responded. "WHY DON'T YOU TAKE THIS SCROLL AND STICK IT. . . .somewhere safe."
: Several sentinels were injured in attempt to detain Sejuani and her mount. Further attempts are discouraged until those trained to survive in the harsh conditions of Freljord are available.
: When cornered for questioning it was found that he had switched out with a fake. The fake erupted in a spray of daggers, injuring several sentinels. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : That's the second time we were duped by a fake!)
: When questioned, Shen stated that he was in fact trying to protect the child. We cannot confirm nor deny his claims at this time.
: Accused of sitting by and watching as Jarvin IV battled several people to the death in a arena he made himself. When confronted about this she replied. "I am of the royal guard. My job is to remain at his side and protect him from harm, nothing else." We are currently looking into finding her mother as her only known deceased relative is her father.
: Singed is wanted for mass genocide committed through use of chemical bombardment.
: Could not be detained. We lost almost thirty sentinels before having to retreat. On our retreat we heard him call out, "COWARDS!!" Ironically as he went the other way.
: Simply stated, "I was paid to do it."
When questioned we found that he could not speak. Sentinels were forced to put him in a sand box alongside Azir until further notice.
: Was detained and questioned, however refused to speak. She kept playing music instead.
: Claimed she was only trying to heal someone. When the Sentinel turned his back on her he was knocked out. Soraka made her escape, leaving behind a note saying, "They never expect the banana!" A large banana was found next to the unconscious Sentinel.
: Accused of sending murderous crows after people. When cornered he transformed into a hideous bird creature.
: Stated, "I just wanted to play dodgeball!"
: Found repeatedly slapping people in the face with his tongue, and having swallowed them whole before spitting them out again on multiple cases. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : This creature disturbs me.)
: Reported for creating large obstructions barring peoples ways. Claims she was trying to keep out illegal immigrants. Her parents are being contacted about the incidents.
: Stated, "I was trying to find my missing blade." Subject escaped after killing two sentinels and wounding three others.
: When confronted regarding the matter, he responded, "Truly outrageous."
: Wanted for poisoning people and getting them high on mushrooms. Widely regarded as satan. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : Wherever he gets these mushrooms, we need to locate them and put them out of business.)
: Thresh was found collected peoples souls. He shows particular interest in anyone whom has healing abilities.
: "Is that a rocket in your pocket?" Has been arrested for sexual harassment towards law enforcement.
: Currently under investigations.
: Sentinels apprehended him, however his wife paid his bail.
: Wanted for running several gambling operations. Could not be detained. Upon locating him, he teleported to safety.
: Ongoing arrest warrant for Twitch.
: Claimed that he wanted to see which was better. His bear stance or the bear. The zoo is now in need of a new bear.
: No explanation needed.
: Caught attempting to infest other people with corruption. Initially arrested fro running around essentially naked as he wears nothing but a scarf.
: When approached for questioning she entered combat with the Sentinels before making her escape. On a side note the Sentinels now have the silver necessary to found new equipment.
: When detained he screamed it was because she called him a, "Shorty". (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : How can this little thing really be evil?)
: Claimed he was interested in finding out the difference between a grown adult's body and that of a child. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : I don't trust that eye of his.)
: Accused of blunt force trauma to the faces of several suspects. Has been suspended from the police force without pay until further notice.
: Found trying to turn several people into machines. When Questioned he responded, "You cannot stop the path of my glorious evolution!"
: Found stalking multiple women. When questioned he said, "It's just that time of the month!" Vladimir has been detained until further notice.
: Animal control had to be called in to help detain him.
See the above. ^
Sentinels were duped by another fake. Subject could not be located for questioning. All known Zoos are currently being checked for his whereabouts. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : That's the third time now!)
: As he does not qualify as a living being since he is made of pure energy, no law applies to him. (http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : Okay we need some laws for people like this too.)
: Sentinels are currently trying to detain him. However none can get close enough to him due to his spear.
: Is currently on the run. Accused of slaying his elders.
: We don't even know who this champion is. We currently have no available information on who he, (she?) is.
: When cornered for questioning he escaped by bouncing over the Sentinels and oozing down a storm drain into the sewer. On a side note, he would probably look good in a suit.
: Upon confronting him the shadows themselves began attacking the Sentinels.
: Reported for testing out new explosives on the populace.
: When confronted he claimed he was only trying to speed up her aging process to make her legal. He has been detained until further notice.
: Wanted for the murder of a sorceress and believed to be the last of her kind.
http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : Those are the champions that have been reported.
Tribunal : These champions have all filed reports against eachother.
http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : Then shall the matter be dismissed?
Tribunal : We will debate on how to deal with this case before we take any further action in regards to the these claims. However this is a serious issue and we will handle it with utmost care.
http://i1378.photobucket.com/albums/ah116/Daniel_Fritsch/Sentinel_zpsmxszyaqd.png : Very well. There is another champion whom has filed reports as well.
: Can you help me?
Tribunal: There is no reason for us to offer aid to a DEAD person. Escort him out of here and present the next case.
######Edited and reposted version of Sentinel's Report. Hopefully I've fixed everything so that the mods wont have to delete it again.
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With utmost regards, the dead person 
