Long time ago, I use to visit a meme sight called 9gag. It was filled with a bunch of good old internet memes like trollface, or rageface, "You're gonna have a bad time" (Way before Undertale came out), and common talk about the things people do in the real world that annoy a lot of people. Nowadays, it's just filled with those poor hopeless bastards who brag about how they don't need a waifu to make their lives happy. Not even 3D waifu's. Just a bunch of sexist memes. Right now, the whole site is full of Game of Thrones memes. I always skip those because I don't watch Game of Thrones. Too busy playing video games, learning how to drive, going to college. At least Vei will be happy to see some floofs, particularly doggos as they called them. I'm not sure if that's what Vei approves since they're 3D, but hey, they're there. I miss the old days where 9gag didn't repost stuff and it wasn't so pathetic about relationships.
Cassette Tape: Yukari's blessing
https://files.gamebanana.com/img/ss/wips/54fd4a0ce37f0.jpg
Reimu: "Grasshopper left his little toy again."
https://orig15.deviantart.net/df70/f/2012/271/7/c/reimu_hakurei_by_orbg-d5g5c7h.jpg
Reimu: "He should probably stop leaving it here. Keep having to look through that thing without even knowing what it's saying."
http://www.metalgearinformer.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/iDroid-iPhone-Case-Light.jpg
Reimu: "I guess I'll just. . . take this thing back to him. . . hm. . . maybe I'll listen to it one more time. Maybe along the way. A nice walk would leave me more time to listen to it. . . Now how does it work?"
http://www.metalgearinformer.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Metal-Gear-Solid-V-Ground-Zeroes-iDroid.jpg
Reimu: "Here we go."
http://thesnakesoup.org/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/tape.jpg
Yukari: "You've done so much for us since you've came here."
"Yeah? So?"
Yukari: "Perhaps we could discuss how we would repay you for your services."
"No thanks. I'd rather the people look out for themselves."
Yukari: "Are you certain you do not wish to claim your payment for your work?"
"I don't need payment. I just want to be left alone to do my work."
Yukari: "I see. . . you've been through so much, yet gained so little before you were brought here. You've been hurt, hunted, enslaved, hated, even betrayed. But that was the outerworld. In here, you are safe. There are many who praise you as our savior. They've even built a monument in your name."
"They're praising me as a god."
Yukari: "And why does that bother you?"
"They don't know who I am or what I can do. All they know is that I saved their asses from an army of primitive tin cans."
Yukari: "If not for you, this whole place would have fallen dominance to the evil army, and this world would have eventually died out with those who fought to protect it. By becoming our defender, you've become Gensokyo's greatest hero. You do love being a hero, don't you?"
"I'm no hero, not while I'm still a monster. The whole world wants my head. Everyone sees me as a demon. If I hadn't come here, this place wouldn't have to know the truth about my criminal records."
Yukari: "This is a peaceful world, Snake. Gods, fairies, humans, and youkai such as myself live peacefully together. Why do you fear being rewarded by the people who love you?"
"It's not them I worried about. It's about what I might do to betray them. Betray their hopes. I'm afraid I might end up killing just like what I did to many others out there."
http://www.anime-planet.com/images/characters/yukari-yakumo-25364.jpg
Yukari: "I know a thing or two about being a monster if that is what you're concerned about. But this world has no trouble with monsters, especially with our friend to look out for them."
"She's just one person. It's gonna take more than a whole army to stop me in case I get out of control."
Yukari: "[sigh] Snake, it's a cold, cold world out there. You don't have to face the cruelty if we could just build you a new home."
"I don't need a house. I can always sleep in a box."
Yukari: "Snake, I understand what you go through. I've been one to face such cruelties myself, but I am giving you a chance to enjoy life, enjoy it while you still can. Because even if what you fear does prove to come true, you can at least enjoy these moments while they last."
"Really? And how am I suppose to enjoy myself if I can't find any joy in doing anything?"
http://static.zerochan.net/Yakumo.Yukari.full.1351524.jpg
Yukari: "Hm. . . you do make a fair point. . ."
https://i.pinimg.com/236x/6a/f5/d7/6af5d767398ac7396c8be3c80c235a5a--purple-dress-pink-eyes.jpg
Yukari: "You know, Snake, there is still a chance for one thing. . ."
http://images.akamai.steamusercontent.com/ugc/397800835210955186/D989BFB4463D989C16C0B19C537C8EAA6B69B7B6/
"What?"
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Yukari: "I'm surprised a man like you hasn't been spoken for. Many of the girls here have been dreaming of the day they wish to take your hand in marriage and live with you for the rest of your life."
"I already told you, I'm a monster and they don't know what a monster like me could do if I get out of control."
http://rs620.pbsrc.com/albums/tt285/aquamarineAngel-tan/Touhou%20Project/2009-06-04-168133.jpg~c200
Yukari: "You're a handsome young man in need to cleanse that lonely heart. The least you could do is take your pick and enjoy it while it lasts."
https://staticdelivery.nexusmods.com/mods/1091/images/162-5-1446488476.jpg
"Thanks, but no thanks. The last time I was in a relationship, I was ditched for a pile of diamonds."
Yukari: "Pity. Such a loss for that woman. She has no idea what she's missing."
"Besides, I've already had my chance in having affairs."
https://t04.deviantart.net/hNQWChTua1Q6oevJ5oZnHMwaAYE=/fit-in/700x350/filters:fixed_height(100,100):origin()/pre11/3b79/th/pre/f/2011/292/5/d/5d0249e9487fa5325699554e1386ee6d-d4dbo78.jpg
Yukari: "But you've never even kissed a girl, have you?"
https://i.pinimg.com/736x/85/80/67/8580676153002e2cbbceb1110f685ac2--image-c.jpg
"What the- Who the hell told you that?!"
https://staticdelivery.nexusmods.com/mods/1091/images/162-6-1446488476.jpg
"Whatever. I don't wanna take that risk again. It's not worth it anymore, not while I too dangerous to talk to."
Yukari: "Speaking of talking, how are you on your Japanese?"
". . ."
Yukari: "You can speak, can you, Snake?"
"Barely. Can't say I'm fluent."
http://orig07.deviantart.net/c0ec/f/2012/006/0/c/reimu_surprised_gif_by_silenciador00-d4liwwr.gif
Reimu: "Wait. . . was that Grasshopper? He's talking?"
https://i3.ytimg.com/vi/v_mAvlTqxc4/mqdefault.jpg
Yukari: "You've made progress. I'm impressed."
"Get back to English. I sound stupid when I speak Japanese."
Yukari: "You will eventually speak properly in our tongue, Snake. Since you at least understand us, we can speak in our mother tongue from now on."
"Whatever. Just leave me alone. I've got work to do."
http://www.metalgearinformer.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/Metal-Gear-Solid-V-The-Lost-Tapes-Cassette-Tape-2.jpg
[End Tape]
https://i.warosu.org/data/tg/img/0318/91/1399228844176.png
Reimu: "Are you kidding me? He actually spoke? He could have said something and I wouldn't have to waste my time teaching him."
http://img06.deviantart.net/5d8d/i/2011/261/b/6/reimu_is_not_amused_by_yukirumo990-d4a7diz.png
Reimu: "Then again. . . he needs to work on that pronunciation."
https://i.pinimg.com/736x/a1/25/16/a12516d44b1daf5284665fb2e928ba84--anime-pictures-collection.jpg
Reimu: "Now where did he go? I need to get this thingy back to him."
http://www.freewebs.com/metalgearsolidnet/This%20is%20what%20being%20a%20soldier%20is%20all%20about.jpg
Reimu: "Huh? What's this? Wait a second. . ."
(Tommy: "You just need to think outside the box. Maybe the real Tommy could be hiding in one somewhere.")
Reimu: "Tommy?"
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