Unofficial telling of League of Legends Lore that makes everything fit. Part 1, Ionia

Alright folks, here we go, this is where I, Shenron, shall make every champion in this game fit into the lore WITHOUT redrawing the map.

For those of you who don't know what it looks like, here is a map of Runeterra:

http://img4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20100821100304/leagueoflegends/images/c/cd/MapofValoran.jpg

Moving forward, we all know of the Noxian invasion of Ionia correct? Good, that's going to be a part of this lore retelling so let's get that over with.

and got pissed off at the Noxian military gaining power over the Noxian high command w/e so they created and sparked the Noxian invasion of Ionia. was leading the noxian military in this endeavor along with his bros and his hoes with tagging along as a military contractor from Zaun.

brought along his wife (He gives her shit to keep her pretty) and his pet rat/ex lab assistant . During the invasion came across a werewolf who was pissed off at a unicorn and thought that werewolves were badass and decided to help him screw over the unicorn. The two of them came up with a plan to create the ultimate supersoldier that would wipe out all the unicorns and was virtually indestructable. caught wind of this since she was spying on the noxian military during the invasion and her duties included observing the contracters as well so she immediately went off to inform the other Ionians and the unicorn.

Upon being told of what the scientists and the mad dog were up to, the Ionians designed a plan centered around sending in a 4 and a half man team to destroy the prototype. During the mission took a lethal dose of cocaine and has never fully recovered. had to leave behind in order to save his own skin and has never forgiven him. got into one hell of a duel with the guard and eventually seduced her and convinced her to abandon Noxus and run away with him. had a terrible interaction with an unfinished science project and had to crawl back broken and battered, BUT HE GOT THE SUPERSOLDIER PROTOTYPE so he wasn't a complete and total failure. On his way back came upon and she demanded to see the prototype. Upon witnessing it and seeing that it was not evil, just neutral she decided to give it life and teach it the ways of the world. Yes, is 's mom, deal with it.

When returned with a jacked in tow and news of running away with a butch woman and s death, or at least he thought he was dead, Zed's girlfriend , lost her cool and damn near killed for leaving him behind until her best friend convinced her not to. Outraged and feeling betrayed stormed off to go live in solitude, or at least it seemed.

After destroying the countryside of Ionia decided it was enough and went back to Noxus with amazing war stories.

Stay tuned for part 2, the Demacian/Noxus war with yordle intervention