The Juggernaut Club: Part 36

The shivering members of the Juggernaut Club are brought inside by Nunu and his Yeti. They may have "procured" supplies from Ornn, but as stated before, it's not an easy trek.

: Come in from the cold and warm your hearts with our purring Poros!

: N-N-Not i-i-interested. I-I j-just want to w-warm up enough to f-feel my blood flowing a-again.

: D-D-Ditto.

: I-I wonder if t-this is h-how it feels t-to be an Ice D-Dragon...

: N-Now I know how it f-feels to Freeze to D-Death...

The others voice their discomfort about the cold with various mumbling and complaints, with the exceptions of Volibear, Udyr and Trundle, for obvious reasons. The 3 of them are all energetic and peppy, like they could go out for a run in the cold like it were for morning exercise.

: You guys think THIS is bad? You should have seen the freeze of '83, when Anivia stubbed a toe! Man, the chills her screams of pain brought-

: No, No. When I had a run-in with Lissandra, THAT was a time that things got cold. She-

: How about from MY end? I'm the one "allied" with her, you dolts! One time, I accidentally spilled my hot cocoa on her, and-

Darius puts up a hand, and they stop talking. Still shivering, he stutters as he talks as a result of it. The others affected by the cold do as well.

: I-if you w-want to swap sto-stories, do it AFTER w-we g-get back to the C-Clubhouse in N-Noxus!

: B-But Dictator, A-aren't we su-supposed to be going to our s-second Clubhouse in D-Demacia after we d-drop off D-D-Draven?

: I-I gave up on that a-a long while b-back! Ba-Basically around the t-time we r-reached the Shadow Isles. B-Besides a-after we kicked out G-Garen, he p-probably wouldn't l-let us into i-it an-anyways.

: W-Why do you s-say th-that?

: B-Because h-he was the one th-that m-maintained i-it. I-It was that p-palace that J-Jarvan g-gave him f-for his birthday that o-one year.

: If you are all done shivering and talking among yourselves, perhaps Braum can do business with you?

Everyone looks, and sees that as they were talking among themselves, Nunu and his Yeti went and got Braum, the owner and operator of the Poro petting zoo.

: Are you here to pet Poros, or must Braum kick you out for loitering?

Having warmed up a bit, the group no longer stutters as they speak.

: Wow. We just got here, and you already want to kick us out for loitering?

: Braum's best business comes from little children and families wanting to pet cute Poros. Having a bunch of rough-and-toughs like you around will surely drive away all my best customers!

: What if Draven told you he wanted to pet the Poros?

: Well then, you'd have to pay like everyone else!

: Well, Draven doesn't- Mmpghgff!?

Darius grabs and covers Draven's mouth with a hand.

(Whispering): Not another word. If he finds out we don't actually HAVE any money, he'll kick us out, and we'll be right back in the cold again. And I'd rather like to be able to feel my limbs for a bit longer before going out there again.

: Mmpfhhff?

: I told you back on the Shadow Isles; it's time to let the ADULT of the Blood Brothers handle things.

Darius lets Draven go, and he, backed by Udyr, Volibear and Trundle, approach Braum.

: Can we get an estimate on how much it'll run for 12 people?

: Well, for adults it's-He suddenly stops short

: Umm... is something the matter?

Braum is looking at Udyr with suspicion. Due to the snow packed up on him, his pelt/attire looks white. The normally coarse furs are much softer feeling due to being wet from the partially-melted snow on them. Suspicious, Braum runs a hand across them, and then sniffs it.

: I knew it. That softness, that odor... it's them, without a doubt. Poor things...

Darius and the others are confused.

: Knew what? What poor things?

: Yeah, I already told PETA that these were f-

: I finally caught you, you Poro-Poachers!

He pulls out his shield, leaps up into the air, and smashes it down, performing his ult, sending a huge crack across the ground!

: WHAT!? NO, THIS IS JUST A MISUNDERSTANDING, MR. BRAUM! WE-

However, the knockback pushes him and the other Juggernaut Club members out the door. Looking very angry, Braum slowly steps out after them. He then turns back to Nunu.

: NUNU! CALL ANIVIA AT ONCE, I'VE FOUND THE POACHERS!

: Right away!

: What poachers!?

: Just a couple days ago, a ruffian riding a white-looking beast carted off with some of Braum's prize Poros! Now Braum knows who! YOU!

: Oh for the love of strength- Run for it!

Darius, followed by all the other Juggernaut Club members and Draven, run out into the cold, for fear of Braum's wrath and misunderstanding of their intentions. He keeps firing his Q at them, but because they're running targets, he keeps missing.

: Draven bets this is something Sejuani did! She's making us her fall-guys!

: I think that's the smartest thing he's said since we started this trip!

Finally, Braum stops chasing them and points towards the edge of the Freljord.

: GET OUT, AND STAY OUT! YOU ARE PERMANENTLY BANNED FROM BRAUM'S ESTABLISHMENT!

: But we didn't even get a chance to pet any-

: OUT!

After running some more to put some distance between themselves and Braum, the members stop to catch their breath.

: Wow. Never seen Braum that angry. What'd you guys do?

Everyone looks, and Ashe is standing there.

: We didn't DO anything. We just walked in, tried to warm up, and-

: And Braum treat Mundo and friends like Poachers! Claimed we WERE poachers!

: Ohh. Sejauni thought that Poro skins would make good pelts for her war-bands. I've heard they're too soft and fluffy to really retain any heat after you skin the beast itself.

: Draven knew it!

: Say, where's Tryndamere?

: I'm actually trying to find him myself. it's about time for his next dose of the "Emotional Balancing Pills". You guys seen him?

Everyone shakes their heads no and shrug their shoulders.

An angry shout breaks the silence.

: Speak of the devil...

Everyone turns, and expecting to see Tryndamere, they instead find...Anivia?

: Whoa! Anny? What are YOU doing here?

: Took the words right out of our mouths!

The others nod in agreement.

: And how'd she get here so fast?

: Prepare to face my judgment, Poachers!

She fires her Q at the Juggernaut Club members!

To Be Continued...