The Juggernaut Club: Part 56
Talon finishes tying a knot in some rope and steps back, dusting off his hands.
: There! And with that, all the traps are set!
Shaco taps him on the shoulder.
: What?
: What if some of our prospective members fall to this traps?
: They won't! They're all too slippery and sneaky, whereas those Juggernauts are all big, dumb and clumsy!
(From a distance): Hey, does anyone else hear that?
: Hear what?
(From a distance): That loud, whining sound like something's going to hit us!
: Hang on, I'll look out the window.
Talon lifts the blinds, and looks out a nearby window. He quickly covers it back up and huddles down in a "Duck and Cover" pose.
: What are you doing?
: TAKE COVER!
Outside, the rocket is going to collide with the monument.
: READY, PARTNER!?
: NO I'M NOOOOOT-
: HERE WE GO!
CRASH!
From a distance, the Juggernaut Club, Sion, and all the others converging on the area see the rocket as it collides and starts to flash a bright light, like it's going to explode!
: NOOOOOOOOOO!
JC members: THE CLUBHOUSE!
: WAIT! I JUST JOINED THE CLUB! I WANT TO SEE WHAT THE CLUBHOUSE LOOKS LIKE ON THE INSIDE! NOOO!
Inside the basement, Garen and Aatrox hear a crash and feel a loud rumbling that shakes the whole area.
Because of the rumbling, Aatrox can't focus his aim, to swing his sword and smash the basement door.
: Of all the times to have an earthquake!
: I don't think that's an earthquake...
Since Garen is standing with Aatrox at the top of the staircase, both of them fail to see a certain half-crazed kunoichi step inside from the broken hole...
: I hear voices....
She looks up, and because she is not in her right mind, she is hallucinating, and sees Garen and Aatrox as Zed and Kayn, respectively.
An insane grin forms on her face as she pulls out her twin sickles...
Everyone outside meanwhile, shields their eyes as the bright light from the rocket becomes too much!
Then the bright light fades....
As everyone opens their eyes, expecting to see a pile of rubble where Sion's Monument once stood, they see... that it's still there?
: What the?
: What's going on?
: Silver lining guys, the clubhouse is still there!
: But look at all the repairs we're gonna have to make!
: You mean the repairs SION will have to make.
: I DON'T CARE ABOUT THAT RIGHT NOW! LET'S GET IN THERE AND STOP HER FROM DOING ANY MORE DAMAGE!
Others: Right!
They resume the run, but are behind the Piltoverians still...
Up above, Jinx is angrily kicking her Super Mega Death Rocket, which, despite landing a direct hit in the hole (And is now stuck in said hole) she made during the "Chaos in Noxus" arc, has failed to explode.
: Come on! Come on! Where's the KABOOM?! There was SUPPOSED to be a monument-shattering KABOOM! ARgggg... PHOOEY!
Jinx pulls out Fish-Bones.
: If you want something to blow up right, you gotta do it yourself! Come on, Partner!
Using her free hand, she grabs Ezreal's hand and jumps down through an opening, into the interior of the monument/clubhouse.
: I'm starting to regret some of my life decisions...
From outside, Caitlyn and Vi have arrived, but the door is locked.
: What!? Get it open, Vi! I don't care how!
: With pleasure, cupcake!
Vi rears back a fist, and performs her Q and plows through the front door of the monument. Both she and Caitlyn go rushing into the structure.
: STOP TEARING UP MY MONUMENT!
JC members: AND OUR CLUBHOUSE!
Inside the basement, the rumbling has stopped.
: OK, quake over? Now can I do this?
He turns to look at Garen, who is right next to him.
: You're gonna want to step back a bit. Don't want to hit you.
: Oh, sure.
He steps back, bumping into something.
: Oof! Hey!
Confused by the feminine sounding voice, Garen looks at Aatrox.
: Did you say something?
: Nope.
: Well then where'd-
He turns around, and sees the crazed Akali insanely grinning at him while holding her sickles at his neck.
: I've got you, Zed!
Seeing it as well, Aatrox dashes forward.
: HEY! DON'T YOU DARE ATTACK MY CLUB-MEMBERSHIP GRANTING GUY!
They collide, and losing footing, they go tumbling down the stairs, fistfighting as they go. Because Aatrox is bigger than Akali, his larger body handles the damage better while she takes the brunt end of it. (Think of the scene from the first Kung-Fu Panda movie where Po and Tai Lung are fighting/falling down the stairs)
: Kayn!? Get off! I'M GOING TO KILL THAT STUPID SHADOW LOVING-Ouch! Ohh! Gah!
: He's-Ouch! Not-Gah! Zed-Agh! And-Oh! I'm-Ow! Not-Oof! Kayn-Geh!
Eventually, they come to a crash at the bottom!
CRASH!
: Oog...
Aatrox leans up, slightly dazed. Akali, on the other hand, is out cold.
: Akali? What in the name of all that is Just is SHE doing out of Ionia?
Aatrox shakes off the dizziness from the fall, stands up, and brandishes his sword similarly to his "Deathbringer Stance".
: I don't know, but out of my way; here I come to smash that door!
He starts running up the stairs!
: EEEYYAAA!
: Holy crap!
Garen quickly jumps to the side as Aatrox runs by him towards the door!
Nocturne, who, instead of actually looking in the basement, just decided to take the lazy way out and is just standing guard, is in front of the door. He's not paying attention to it though, because the whole area has just been rocked by Jinx's rocket colliding with the structure.
: Darkness!? (WHAT THE CRAP WAS THAT!?)
CRASH! The sound of splintering and shattering wood and metal is heard! Nocturne quickly turns around!
: DARKNESS!? (NOW WHAT THE CRAP IS THAT!?)
Standing there are Aatrox and Garen.
: Darkness... (Oh Shi-)
SMACK! A punch from Garen right in Nocturne's face sends the "Eternal Nightmare" to dreamland.
: So what'd you think? Am I strong enough for the club?
: There's more to an initiation than just breaking down doors. WE gotta kick out these bumbling "Obliterator's Order" kooks since the others ain't here. Then I'll give my grade!
Aatrox happily holds up his sword.
: I'm on it!
To Be Continued...
