The Juggernaut Club: Part 49

As Urgot and Sion are rejoicing in their restoration to their "normal" selves, Zac hears the sound of a certain steam-golem restarting.

: Blitzy!

He turns and Blitzcrank, also restored by the Z-Drive and Stopwatch Resonator event, is humming back to life.

: UNEXPECTED SHUTDOWN DETECTED. THIS UNIT WILL NOW PERFORM DIAGNOSTIC TESTS TO ENSURE PROPER FUNCTION.

As Swain and Vlad are being chased around the room by an angry Viktor, Blitzcrank shoots out his right hand, to ensure his Rocket Grab is functioning properly. It grabs Viktor, and pulls him to Blitzcrank!

: BLITZ!? WHAT IN THE-

SMACK!

Blitzcrank uses his Power Fist and knocks Viktor into next week! As Viktor flies up high in the air, Blitzcrank fires off his Static Field! At the same time, Ekko, seeing the restored Z-Drive, jumps in to try and grab it, and lays his hand on it, just as Blitz fires off the Static Field!

Everyone Else: Hey, wait- GAHH!

Everyone is promptly stunned for a moment as the electric shock hits them! Everyone but Mundo that is, who was conveniently shielded by the walls of the room he had just chased Ekko out of.

: DIAGNOSTIC TESTS COMPLETE. THIS UNIT PERFORMS AT SATISFACTORY LEVEL.

Mundo walks into the room, nodding his head in a pleased fashion.

: Patient Zero finally holding still! Now as heads-up, if Mundo do this wrong, it hurt a little. If he do it right, it hurt alot! Here goes!

He throws his cleaver, landing a direct hit in Ekko's back!

: GAAAAH!

Ekko falls to the ground flat on his face with the cleaver sticking out of his back, and Mundo walks up and pulls the cleaver out of him, wiping off the blood on his tattered clothes.

: See? It not so bad, now is it? If you need second dose, you know where to find Mundo.

The others are quite shocked. Mundo actually GOT Ekko! Not to mention disgusted because of the blood all over as a result.

: Oh... I think I'm gonna puke!

: You can't puke, you don't have a stomach-

: BLAAUUUGHH!

"Vomit" resembling Black Mist shoots out of Morde's "Face"!

: Oh my Nagakabourous, it's everywhere!

CRASH!

Viktor, who had been up in the air courtesy of Blitzcrank, just landed in it! Mundo, ignoring everyone else's disgust, dusts his hands off.

: Mundo has finally cured Patient Zero! We can go back to Clubhouse, Dictator!

Darius nods his head while holding his hands over his mouth and nose, presumably to stop himself from retching like Morde had just done.

: Man. Is this the kind of stuff you do all the time?

: It sure is!

: Hey! You not member of Club, you can't say that!

Urgot has a quizzed look on his face, but then shrugs his shoulders and smiles.

: I'm gonna LOVE this Club!

: MPPGHHFF!

Darius points to the door, and the Club members start filing out, along with Sion. Once out there, he uncovers his mouth.

: Ahh! I assumed that stuff would smell terrible, so I took the precaution of covering my mouth and nose. Now, we need to get back to get Urgot's welcoming party going.

: Welcoming party? What about Noxus? With the condition myself and Jinx left it in, I'm not sure it can handle a party.

: Fear not! Draven knows that Noxians are a strong people! We will rebuild, we will recover. We will reduce, reuse, recycle!

: I got a better Idea! We'll REWIND!

Swain goes up and grabs the Z-Drive from the motionless Ekko, and runs out, pushing the Club members out of his way as he runs back towards Noxus, with Vlad close behind!

: We bet you won't even recognize the place when we get back!

The Club members watch until the two are out of sight.

: Are we going to rush like them?

Darius shakes his head no.

: Nope! If I've learned anything over the course of THIS trip, it's not to rush anything!

The Juggernaut Club start walking away to leave Zaun at a calm, leisurely pace, with Sion in-tow as well, unlike the frenzied, hurried pace of Swain and Vlad. Meanwhile, Zac and Blitz are standing in Ekko's ruined lab.

: Well, what do we do now? Ekko's dead, Viktor's out cold.

He snaps his fingers.

: Hey! Wanna go see what Warwick and Singed are up to? Maybe they've incurred Janna's wrath like they did that one time!

: AFFIRMATIVE.

The two turn to leave, but then they hear a noise behind them. They look, and where Ekko was laying, there is nothing!

: Oh crap.

He turns to Blitzcrank, assuming he's going to flip out like he did with Urgot and Sion in their Pre-VGU states. Thankfully he doesn't, but still, where'd Ekko go?

: Over here.

Both look, and there sits Ekko atop a pile of boxes, back to normal, without even a scratch on him!

: But how- You did- Swain took-

Zac stammers repeatedly as Ekko chuckles.

: You think I'd let them have the REAL Z-Drive? What are you, nuts?

: INCORRECT. HE IS COMPRISED OF A GREEN TOXIC SUMP AND VARIOUS ZAUNITE CHEMICAL COMPOUNDS THAT POOLED TOGETHER IN VARIOUS HOLES AND DUMPS AND OVER TIME, EVENTUALLY ATTAINED SENTIENCE. ADDITIONALLY...

(Loudly, over Blitzcrank, who continues in the background): Anyway, that one was a fake! He pulls out the real one, hidden in his pocket the entire time. Imagine the looks on Swain and Vlad's faces when they try using it!

: What do you mean, it's a fake!? It sure worked on Urgot and Sion!

: Well, being bathed in its aura perhaps let it pick up some of the original item's functions? He shrugs his shoulders

Zac's eyelids dim as he looks at Ekko with an unconvinced look on his face.

: I don't believe that explanation, and by the look on your face, neither do you.

Ekko frowns, and points to the ruined door.

: Get out of my lab!

Zac rolls his eyes.

: Come on, Blitzy!

Zac then leaves, along with Blitz, the two entirely forgetting about Viktor lying unconscious in Mordekaiser's Black Mist "Vomit". Ekko sees this mess, as well as the rest of the damage as he looks around his ruined lab. His hands clench into fists in frustration.

: CURSE YOU JUGGERNAUT CLUB!

To Be Continued...

An update on the future of the series: This was the only episode I managed to salvage. Everything else from 50 onward is unfortunately too corrupted to save. I'll have to re-write them from scratch, and so, don't expect an episode next week. If I can get it rewritten and up in time, then so be it. But otherwise, don't expect one.