wait times are so fun when your game bugs out

So, this happened to my girlfriend the other night, and now me too.

I went to start up an aram, with a full team. everyone got into champ select, of course, besides myself, because of my awesome bad luck. we all had a great team, from what i was told, but we werent sure whether or not if i should restart my client.

when it happened to my girlfriend, we didnt know what happened, and she didnt restart until we started loading in, as we took so long to figure out what to do. i said, "fuck it, gonna restart client, im bugged out" and now it counted against me as a dodge, and now im sitting here with a 13 minute wait before we can queue.

do dodges stack? and for how long? this is so insane. in the entire time one of my friends has been playing, he told me "be glad it wasnt me who dodged, or we'd be waiting an hour or so"

keep in mind, the people that i play with are not toxic. we dont leave games unless something bugs out/ internet goes down/ computer trouble, or we desperately need to.

Riot, can we please work on this whole "penalizing everyone" thing, even when they arent exactly to blame? like, isnt there a way you can detect HOW someone left a game?

an idea would be like, if someone leaves through actually pressing esc and leaving, it should be a penalty. if a player is moving around, and suddenly the game closes, that must mean their computer may have messed up or something.

i HAVE PURPOSELY left games due to being incredibly bm/pissed that we were losing (besides the few custom games between friends - which, pleaaase tell me we dont get penalized for those). I get that i need to be punished for that. but every other time i have left a game was due to some mishap. within the last 5 days,

-My computer blue screen'ed during a game -I got a bugsplat, and was told that an "essential asset" was missing and i needed to repair my client -my laptop overheated

i dont have the best understanding on the whole buster system, but im pretty sure none of those were of my own fault, and not a purposeful leave, so wouldn't that mean that i SHOULDNT get penalized?

and if i should be, okay thats one thing, but heres another thing....

with all three of those scenarios, I returned to the game before it ended. the only one where i went negative in KD was the bluescreen. The bugsplat one left me DC'd for approx. 30 minutes, i came back, and got a buster warning. The overheat though, i came back just around the 10 minute mark and didnt get a warning or anything when i returned

my question here is, am i still getting penalized for returning to a game, after some sort of a leave, over a certain time limit?

I'd love it if a rioter/ anyone really could give me their thoughts on this whole thing.