Welcome to League of Smackdown
DISCLAIMER -for the record i am not posting on behalf of any rioter or claiming to be one-
Welcome to League of Smackdown, Where all your one shots and brainless keyboard smashing comes to life. I would like to welcome you on your new journey of ranked where the strategies you play don't actually matter. On this new rift, a good majority of your games will be decided in champion select. For the remainder of the games that are not decided then, they will be decided within the first 5-10 minutes of your in-game experience. I will now give you some guidelines to succeed in this new game.
- Pick the champion that is most over-powered that has not been banned (do not fear, there will be plenty)
- Do not worry about feeding. The game has been balanced to where even the players that are behind due to their own mistakes will have an increasingly amount of chance to succeed as long as they have picked the correct over-powered champions.
- Play all your ranked games as if they are casual. This is how the game has been designed now. Ranked is nothing but a coin-flip these days due to game knowledge, mechanics, and consistency are near non-factors in the majority of your games.
Just remember Summoners, do not pick what you are good at. Pick what is strong. This is all that matters for a successful climb. If you are Support pick Brand. If you are the marks- I mean bot laner, pick a bruiser such as Irelia or a mage such as Swain. Picking an ADC is not considered viable unless your entire team picks around your carry. If you are mid, you will likely still pick a bruiser or mage. If you are top or jungle, well you're still highly likely to pick a bruiser or mage. Do not play to scale. This is not how the game was meant to be played. This is no longer a viable tactic. Play aggressive and without brain cells.
Ladies and gentlemen - 
To the arena!
Side Note: If you found this to be of humor and remotely accurate, pleasure give it an up vote. As always, everyone is entitled to their own opinions and ideas. Once again, good luck in the quadrilateral!