Riot, please change baron's appearance

Hello everyone at Gameplay & balance, I'm sure you've all been in the following situation: You and your team are ahead, the enemies are all alive but their inhib lies open, some genius suggests going baron, you plead your team not to do it but they don't listen, they then proceed to get aced (if you came to help) and the enemies take baron, they proceed to take your inhib because of lategame deathtimers, if you did not follow this suicidal plan then prepare to get flamed.

Situation two: your team is behind a bit but you have nice waveclear so you can stall the enemies, some genius once again pings baron, everyone (with or without you) goes to baron, the enemies are still all alive and your team gets aced/ 5v4'd the enemies, proceed to finish after finishing off baron and it's a loss for you.

Now the question that boggles my mind: "Why does everyone feel so insanely attracted to baron Nashor?" Whether ahead or behind, people can't seem to stop oggling that beautiful, purple snake and they just have to throw themselves at it. I have come up with one hypothesis: Freud must be right, Baron Nashor is obviously a phallic symbol and people let loose their represseed urges by trying to throw themselves on it. They just want that green gooey goodness all over them while hugging the big purple phallus.

Now I know it may sound ridiculus, as is usually the case with Freud, but I honestly can't think of a better explanation. Can someone help me out here? I would also love it if you have some advice on how to prevent my teammates from throwing the game in such a fashion as the purple snake has cost me a lot of games (and won me some) already because of players feeling attracted to it.