Day 1 in Gold V, I have yet to encounter any intelligent life

VoidBorn13·12/12/2016, 5:08:27 PM·172 votes·7,978 views

The natives of this Rank appear to believe that copy paste "Pro" builds and KDA are all they need to win games.

Creep score appears to take priority over Objectives and remains a point of pride worth bragging about for the unintelligent beasts I've found.

Pings to contest Dragons and Barons go unanswered, requests to group down a lane to take free towers while the other lanes auto-push with minions are ignored.

I've yet to encounter any friendly tanks that build when behind so our towers don't suffer while they're off roaming through the Jg.

and players continue to ignore all common sense and insist on going solo into unwarded territory and seem compelled by some suicidal urge to go 1v3 against full health enemies.

I fear for the future.

139 Comments

RocketRelm12/12/2016, 6:15:06 PM88 votes

Reporting in from Platinum Two.

The Vayne Yasuo behavior has not changed, in fact, they're setting fire to the AllChat system. Flames everywhere. Mayday, I may need an Evac.

Tormentula12/12/2016, 6:08:46 PM85 votes

http://s2.quickmeme.com/img/df/df99b19b709a115b19ff9d24427c026637ae213cbd36989ec4ef3165e778f296.jpg

Malicious Metal12/12/2016, 8:30:39 PM21 votes

Wait 'til you get to Plat IV

I've seen...things...

DJMason8812/13/2016, 2:26:17 AM13 votes

Read this in Velkoz 's voice. It makes it MUCH better.

PiVoRx12/12/2016, 9:02:57 PM11 votes

Gold V you say? TRY DIAMOND 5 YOU WILL THANK GOD YOU SIT IN GOLD

Hella Kaiser12/12/2016, 11:05:20 PM11 votes

report from bronze: the behavior of Yasuo and Vayne has not changed. but there's one thing different: while Vayne keeps feeding and flaming, Yasuo gets triples 1v5 even when behind. ADCs are turrets as they seem to be unable to attack and move at the same time. while this might have some consequences, champs like Jinx can still get a triple while being afk. junglers are a bit too slow. the first gank happens at level 5, while the first drake is taken at min 23. cs is just ignored. AI has better focus. Intelligent life might be found here; need further investigation on "minions".

Tangy Citrus12/13/2016, 5:07:17 AM9 votes

Bronze 4, day 6.

CS is ignored completely. Pushing lanes isn't a priority until everyone decides to group up and go straight down mid lane and keep kamikazi-ing into the enemy turret until it falls, you're wiped, or the enemy split pushes down a side lane and then everyone backs to chase them. After you win a lane, its your sworn duty to go to the other lanes and bring your lane with you, take that lanes cs, and accomplish nothing. You will not see the enemy jungler until end game or if they come to your lane to take some of your cs. When your lane roams your duty is to stay in your lane but stay under your turret and not attack theirs at all. God save you if you get an auto-filled support in this tier.

Welcome to hell, enjoy your ever lasting stay.

Project omen12/12/2016, 7:54:37 PM8 votes

From my experience when I was in that elo, gold players think winning team fights is everything. They don't care much about objectives, they think that by forcing and winning fights they will win the game.

Scary Door12/13/2016, 2:11:59 AM7 votes

That's not exclusive to Gold V.

Ironicaly, people seem to try harder in Bronze, but they just lack the ability or understanding to close out games.

In Silver everyone just wants to be the hero (much like you have described). By far it is the most chaotic tier I know of because there are legitimately good players that are climbing and then others that are just never going to improve because they are too stubborn or don't care.

Gold is a vast wasteland of MMR boosted accounts, a few quality players, some feeders and trolls and they all typically end up in the same game somehow.

Rockm Sockm12/13/2016, 8:31:00 PM6 votes

Bronze IV reporting in. Life is good down here, and the air is breathable. Sure, it is a mix of actual bronze and former silver,gold, and platinum primates....but they are amusing.

The drinks are cold and the fish in the river are biting. Come on down and watch the monkeys beat there chests at each other and run full-speed, head first into walls. At the end of the day, you can't help but laugh because while there is no intelligent life....there are also no fs given.

Ralanr12/12/2016, 7:56:34 PM6 votes

Huh...and here I am playing with bronze and silver players in my placements and rarely are people completely stupid.

Salty, but no one is stupid yet.

BearsOnCrack12/13/2016, 11:36:36 AM5 votes

Support mains love all those "good" adc's out there

the weeaboo12/13/2016, 3:21:21 AM5 votes

Houston this is Bronze V sshhhhkkkk we have a problem . It appears intelligent life does not exist on any level in this territory shhhkkkkk Gold V, Plat II, and Bronze V all seems to be encountering similar results. Hope for climbing out of this trench looks bleak over

SzGamer22712/13/2016, 4:21:32 PM5 votes

After reading through this thread, I can only conclude that there is no intelligent life anywhere in League of Legends. TuT

DevilsDog12/13/2016, 4:57:45 PM5 votes

Day 225 in designated sector "Unranked"

Assigned sector is....odd to say the least. Fauna seems to vary immensely, showing similarities to specimens found in sectors "Gold" and "Bronze" at times.

At times, the fauna is capable of communication amongst themselves, showing coordination in action and developing strategies to adapt to threats. They have been observed collecting the maximum of the "Creep Score" resource as possible without hindering the community, and erecting crude observation devices "codename: ward item 3340 " to monitor key areas of the territory from safety, while destroying similar devices placed by their predators.

However, it appears that despite this show of intelligence that would be a clear boon if encouraged to grow, there is an overwhelming popularity of subjects Vayne and Yasuo in this sector. The abundance of subjects results in the destruction of teams as a result of refusal to coordinate with team for reasons stated as "stfu %%%got" and "stfu you suck, I'm pro" (Note: rough translation, full translation impossible due to language bond being absent) As a result, the community dynamic is destroyed and the area dissovles into aggressive shows of dominance to claim "top" "mid" "adc" and "JG" territories, while those who fail to be dominant are forced into the undervalued "supp" territory. These subjects, despite attempting to rally the team together, are ignored in favor of the pursuit of addictive substance known as "KDA" and "S-rank"

In seems that because of these harsh environmental conditions, the subjects managing to migrate to other territories such as "Bronze" or "Silver" undergo two possible metamorphosis. Either they create hardened carapaces and lose function to communicate with other subjects, and subsequently remain oblivious to nearly subjects, or they enhance communication capabilities and communicate with nearby subjects in a variety of ways. One subject was observed being hostile and vitriolic to his community, while another's was observed to be constructive. Due to the unpredictable nature of the subjects, further study is required. It is fascinating to observe how subjects change when interacting.

This is Unranked Overvation reporting in. Further observation required. Requesting cooperation of Bronze, Silver, Gold, and Plat sectors to compare data.

Squeaky Dreemurr12/13/2016, 3:02:29 AM4 votes

i am str8 dying rn

here

have my upvote

Sraeg201312/12/2016, 8:01:04 PM1 votes

Honestly item 3512 is a bad item.

It causes the enemy minions to stop and because of that they continue to pile up to the point, that may the God have mercy on your tower, if you don't address it soon.