League of Legends Zombie Apocalypse

Scenario: An accident, magical, chemical, etc, however you prefer it, caused a zombie apocalypse in Runeterra. Zaun, Demacia, Noxus, Ionia, etc. are all overcome by a plague that spread quickly and has completely overtaken the world in an apocalyptic and nearly hopeless scenario. Now picture, if you will, some of our favorite characters and champions surviving the initial appearance of the illness and now finding themselves in a world of the living dead. This post is meant to analyze how each would fare on their own, and just generally start a fun discussion on the subject.

Rules: The game runs on the assumption that zombies in League work off of the attributes presented in the Max Brooks books (World War Z, Zombie Survival Guide, etc. great books btw), and will be judged as such, including destruction of the brain as the only way to kill them, any creature attempting to consume the meat dies, etc. I also assume that magic damage, as long as it destroys or severely incapacitates the brain, will kill. The characters perform either as their lore would allow or based off of the game’s logic, whichever benefits them the most. This operates under the idea that the zombie virus is of a magical origin, but still spreads like a virus would. The champions will be judged primarily off of their ability to combat zombies and ability to survive, but survival is key, so abilities granting things like stealth or an effective defense will be considered and drastically add to their score. This section is based entirely on the character soloing it, being alone with only their wits, weapons, and skills to aid them. Also, I’m saying the virus also infected Bandle City because I want to talk about some of those furry jerks get eaten and disregard the whole, “impossible to find,” thing. I’m going to keep posting the rest, these are just to start off, but please feel free to contribute your own or disagree. Just please keep it respectful, my dudes. This is a discussion on fictional characters surviving a fictional zombie apocalypse based off of the works of a fiction author. Calm yourself and take your hands away from the salt shaker.

I will be ranking them off of a scale from 0-10. These are examples to bring context to each score, but of course, is not definitively and undoubtedly how well each champion will do. 0- Completely Useless/Feeding Zombies, report on sight 1- Gets 404ed, health bar not found 2- Dies quick, does absolutely nothing 3- Survives for a while, does some damage, but won’t be stopping any major outbreaks anytime soon 4- Could protect a nexus from invasion, for awhile 5- Adequately competent, takes down a lot of zombies and just might make it if they play their cards right (C) 6- Will probably be alright, makes it through the apocalypse or at least takes down thousands with them (B) 7- No support necessary, definite survivor and certified zombie destroyer (A-) 8- Could reclaim Bandle City (A) 9- Could take Valoran (A very high rank, and the one most top picks will be in. A+) 10- Could clear all of Runeterra (To achieve this rank, there needs to be nothing that can stop them and they need to be able to clear every square inch of Runeterra. Very few will reach it. S+)

Aatrox: Gains strength through blood, zombies do not have blood, so that’s a major advantage gone. While he is strengthened through combat, it is the blood itself that heals him and gives him his abilities, so against an enemy without blood, like the zombie, he cannot survive too long if overwhelmed. However, the ability to fly (at the expense of his most valuable resource) and his sword stand out as strong points, as even without feasting on blood, his sword can still kill very effectively. Add to it the humans that he is likely to meet, humans with blood he can consume, and he is overall strong, but not too strong. Final Rank: 6

Ahri: This character is a bit of a mixed bag and difficult to decipher based off of both Lore and in game. Her Essence Theft might cause her to contract the disease, might not. In the event it does not, her magic could kill a zombie, but only if she gets a headshot. She is fairly intelligent, so if she figures this out, she could easily become a very effective zombie hunter. However, her E, Charm, is completely useless. Final Rank: 0 or 5, depending on how Essence Theft works.

Akali: Akali’s extensive training in stealth and combat make her extremely effective against zombies. With accuracy with her strikes and projectiles, she could kill hundreds, even thousands. While her W, Twilight Shroud, won’t help her as zombies don’t rely on sight, Akali’s speed and agility can easily get her away from many zombie threats, unless she’s surrounded or trapped. Akali’s only major disadvantage is that if she is ever caught by too many zombies, if she is unable to fight her way out, she has no protection whatsoever against grabbing or biting, and will almost certainly die. Final Rank: 8

Alistar: Alistar is a giant Minotaur that can do massive damage to a large amount of zombies at once. His offensive capabilities are vast, even possibly being able to disable zombies without ever touching them by smashing his fist into the ground. Of course, he would have to clean up afterwards and in some way destroy the brain, but that is no problem for someone his size. However, much like Akali, his defense leaves something to be desired. Despite his large amount of health, a single bite or infection through any other means would be the end of the large blue bull. Final Rank: 6

Amumu: Amumu is an odd case, and I believe he would neither attack, nor be attacked by the zombies. The disease only attacks living tissue, and Amumu is very dead. In fact, he may enjoy the zombies, as he could stay with them and they will not die around him, or at least not like humans would. In other words, Amumu will not intentionally harm the zombies, and they will not attempt to harm him, so Amumu will continue to survive unless the curse is somehow broken. And survival, is what this is all about, so, in a way, he gets top marks. He might even finally get some friends. Final Rank: 10

Anivia: I don’t think much needs to be said about Anivia. Even if she couldn’t fly away from any zombies, even if zombies were able to somehow bite her and cause significant damage, even if zombies could somehow hurt the Freljord itself, her only concern, she would just be reborn soon after. In other words, Anivia cannot be substantially hurt by a zombie apocalypse and would probably barely even notice. Final Rank: 10

Annie: As the Zombie Survival Guide explains, fire can be an effective weapon, if you can completely disintegrate a zombie. Annie can certainly do this with her abilities, but her mana doesn’t last forever. Like many of the Human champions, just one bite will be the end of her. Her E, Molten Shield, could help her avoid the fatal bite, but more likely will just set whatever zombie eating her on fire. Annie’s W will set a cone of enemies on fire, but will not destroy them, causing there to be a few shambling torches coming towards her. Tibbers, like all animals has a natural aversion to zombies, but under Annie’s guidance would continue to fight, but carefully, to avoid ingesting the deadly flash. Eventually though, the zombies would overcome Tibbers. Overall, she wouldn’t be likely to survive, and honestly, would probably not realize the threat she’s dealing with and die very quickly. Final Rank: 3

Ashe: Ashe is a master archer, and would easily be able to hit headshot after headshot on the slow moving zombies. The game doesn’t really specify how the slow works, so there’s no way to know if it would affect the zombies, but what’s important is that she can effectively kill them and, even better, she has infinite ammo. She has an excellent weapon against the undead, has lived in the harsh wastes of the Freljord, but not much else. However, her skills and weapon alone are easily enough to make her an effective survivor, especially if she stays in the Freljord where the living dead would be disadvantaged. As she’s still human, she could theoretically die, especially in a situation where her sacrifice would save others, so with that in consideration, she is not given a 10. Final Rank: 9

Aurelion Sol: Similar to Anivia, this is a Cosmic Star Dragon. Zombies ain’t killing this, much less biting it. Just because, let’s take a look. He can fly over every zombie, going directly to safety, maybe even use it to charge one of his Q’s which can probably kill at least a dozen zombies even at just half strength. His ultimate can erase several zombies at once and he can keep them at a distance with his stars and W. Sol would probably just watch the world burn with pleasure, making sassy remarks and revel in being free. When he gets bored, he leaves and goes back to the stars he loves so dearly. Final Rank: 10

Azir: The Emperor of the Sands is as good as it gets when it comes to zombie survival. As an Ascendant, he doesn’t need food, water, or other things usually necessary for survival. He is literally a God thanks to his Shuriman rituals and as such is really hard to kill, if he can be. If anything goes wrong, he has an endless supply of sand soldiers, each cannot be harmed by zombies, each very deadly for offense and defense against zombies. Even if a zombie got close to him, they wouldn’t live very long. I visualize him conquering Runeterra, assembling all the survivors under the banner of Shurima, then looking to the stars, finding a nearby planet and saying, “That will be the next Shurima.” However, it might be possible for a large group of zombies to kill him if they do get him, so he’s slightly below, say, Aurelion Sol. Final Rank: 9

Bard: I do not believe Bard would fight in a zombie apocalypse. While everyone on Earth dies, this does not affect the universe at large and as such, he would probably just leave, waiting until a new catastrophic event occurs elsewhere, something worthy of his time. Final Rank: N/A

Blitzcrank: Blitzcrank, though he can’t be turned into a zombie, can still be destroyed by them. However, they would not attack him as he is not a living thing. They would attack him about as often as a random car. That is, they wouldn’t. If he were to get in the way of a meal though, enough undead fists bashing at his frame could deal some damage. His attacks are not tailored for zombie elimination, but he would do well enough and would almost certainly survive, though he may not become the savior of humanity. Final Rank: 7

Brand: Powers are very similar to Annie, and yet, his chances are very different. While mana is still a very big problem for him, Brand’s abilities, specifically his passive, allow him to spread his fire to so many zombies. Whereas most die when surrounded, that’s where Brand would thrive best. It’s also arguable as to whether or not Brand can be turned by the zombies or if they’d have to literally eat him to kill him. In short, he seems damaging and pretty survivable. Final Rank: 8

Braum: Braum is a great support, but not one designed to fight millions of combatants on his own. His shield helps to keep him protected from bites, but only in one direction. He can punch so hard he can break rocks, true, but if he were to try and punch a horde of zombies to death, eventually his fists would be caught in the head of a zombie, causing infection. He would have to punch them in the head, and with the destruction he causes, he’s likely to create sharp shards that could cut him and introduce him to the virus, causing the hero’s life he’s enjoyed, to end. Now, that’s not to say he’s useless in every respect. He’s not good alone, but his score will fare infinitely better in a community, the next list I plan on posting. Final Rank: 3

Caitlyn: Caitlyn may seem like an ideal champion for zombie survival, and while she is overall a great pick, she’s not top tier. Her weapon and skills with it, are a huge plus. She can deliver consistent headshots, both through focused accuracy, and possibly even her W, Yordle Snap Trap, if she needs help. However, if she were to set up somewhere, take down dozens of zombies, but then find herself surrounded due to the noise of her gun, she would have no effective way of escape. The worst thing about zombies is the fact that in the event of an outbreak the size of our scenario, they will be everywhere. Her attempting to fight the menace would certainly attract more through the noise. In other words, thought she’s effective when alone, she is also at extreme risk. Having other people to protect her, however, would make her a force to be reckoned with, but that will be discussed in the other list, similar to Braum. Final Rank: 5

Camille: Camille is an excellent pick against a zombie apocalypse. It’s arguable as to whether or not she can even be turned to a zombie, and whether or not they would attack her at all. It’s questionable as to whether or not she is still even human anymore, and if that’s true, she might have immunity to them. Even if she’s not, her leg blades are an excellent weapon for decapitation against the undead, her W, could kill several at once, and her E gives her great mobility. Her ultimate, unfortunately, is useless, but even without it, she is formidable at worst. Final Rank: 9

Cassiopeia: Completely useless. Every one of her abilities and even her basic attacks are based off of poison, something zombies are completely immune to. The only ability she could even use is her ultimate, and all it does is prolong her life for a few more seconds. Final Rank: 0

Cho’Gath: Cho’Gath might actually put a dent in the living dead. To me, the Solanum virus does not affect those that are not of this world, void creatures like Cho’Gath should be fine. I think he could satisfy his carnivorous urges without fear of dying from the virus and use his abilities to cause mass chaos. In the event that the virus does kill him and he is aware of this, he still has a good many tools to use against them. He can’t use his ult or his passive, but well aimed spikes would kill zombies in droves, along with his Q. Also, his W could theoretically cause a zombie’s head to explode, but if that fails then it is useless. Maybe he could adjust the frequency to cause death. In either scenario, the zombies can do nothing against him; his tough skin is far too much for biting, clawing, or the strength of a zombie. Also, due to his endless hunger, he not only could, but will, hunt down every last zombie in existence, causing the planet to be purified if he is given enough time and cannot be infected. Final Rank: If affected by virus: 6. If not, 10

Corki: Many of Corki’s weapons are explosives based and thus, less effective than a precise strike to the head. His constant moving while flying lends itself well to suppressive fire, but not precise headshots. These are the negatives, however, and Corki has much going for him. His plane makes him untouchable by a zombie menace and would only be vulnerable while refueling. He could survive in relative peace if he just kept to himself, even taking some zombies down. However, Corki is a brave, and sometimes stupid, yordle that would probably fight as many as possible, possibly leaving himself open to attack. In Lore he’s gotten a bit in over his head before and crashed, and if that were to happen over infected territory, he’s a goner. Overall though, I think he’d be fine and probably live through. Final Rank: 6

Darius: The Noxian Guillotine has some serious strengths to him. For one, his axe and expertise with it easily make him a zombie’s worst nightmare. For another, his armor helps to keep him protected. Now, the Zombie Survival Guide notes that armor, especially heavy armor like Darius’ is actually a terrible idea. However, that’s in real life, where people like us get tired, and would die easily if surrounded by zombies, where our best hope lies in sneaking and hiding. Darius, however, would never tolerate such cowardice. He would charge the enemy and take head after head. His armor can protect him from bites he might sustain as long as they don’t go for the face, but I think they’d never get that close. Strong as he is, all of his attacks are single target, and his aggressive attitude might cause him to bite off more than he could chew. As such, he becomes a bit of a glass cannon but would still do an excellent job and be one of the best survivors in the League. He does Noxus proud. Final Rank: 7

Diana: Diana’s blade is a great weapon against zombies, perfectly designed for decapitation. Unfortunately, that is about all she is. Her Q travels across the ground, meaning no damage to the head. Her W would do some damage and protect her from up to 3 attackers. Her ultimate allows her to dash away from danger by going to another zombie with a quick slash. In short, all of her abilities have a use, just not a lot of use, she would perform well, but not incredibly. Final Rank: 6

Dr. Mundo: Mundo has made himself into a living tank, but in this case, the zombie’s have one hell of an anti-tank weapon. While he can use his cleaver to kill zombies, they need only one bite to kill him, as he is still human, barely. Also, as part of his experiments, he has, “dulled his survival instinct,” according to the Champion page. I believe he’d try and take one to experiment on, get bitten, and die. Final Rank: 1

Draven: Draven could kill lots of zombies at once, or at the very least incapacitate them and kill them later. However, I won’t talk in particular about anything else because he is certainly dead. His bravado and intense desire for fame and recognition means he will charge into a group of thousands, and get himself killed. Final Rank: 2

Ekko: Ekko has several advantages to him. He grew up on the rough streets of Zaun, making the survival aspect a piece of cake for him. Ekko’s ability to warp time, specifically his E, will help him greatly in getting out of situations. His W and the stun it procs will certainly be useful against an advancing horde. His R not only gets him out of a bad place, but could possibly kill zombies, as it works off of breaking a timeline, causing massive damage to everything around him. On the weaker side, his Timewinder is useless and his weapon of choice isn’t ideal, but will probably work for him. Overall, not a strong choice, but a decent one. Final Rank: 5

Elise: Elise is weak, but not an instant loss. Spiderlings can latch onto zombies then explode, dealing damage to them. However her main attacks of eating and venom will fail. As such, she won’t live long, but she can take down a few dozen first. Final Rank: 3

Evelynn: Evelynn is well prepared for a zombie apocalypse whether she knows it or not. Her ability to sink into the shadows gives her unparalleled stealth abilities for avoiding the undead. On top of this, she can move quickly through the shadows and if found use her spikes effectively for quick and silent kills. However, her focus would not be on killing the zombies, just surviving and profiting off of other survivors. As such, she is disqualified from higher ranks, but definitely a survivor. Final Rank: 7

Ezreal: Ezreal is a young man thrust into the role of hero due to a discovery he once made, but this doesn’t mean he can’t do great things. His Shuriman artifact, if used accurately, could easily take down a mob. A wide variety of shots can be made, as demonstrated from his in game abilities, probably allowing him to do special things we can’t see in game. Add that to the warp ability of his E and his global ultimate, and Ezreal can be a hero before and after the apocalypse begins. Final Rank: 7

Fiddlesticks: The Harbinger of Dread brings about his own doom in a zombie apocalypse. His tactics of wait and scare will do nothing to a zombie and scarecrows are hardly tools of decapitation. While not made of flesh, similar to Blitzcrank, Fiddlesticks would likely be ripped apart. Even if he survives, it is only through inaction, definitely not high marks for such a frightening character. Final Rank: 5

Fiora: The Grand Duelist will have significantly more than one zombie to fight, but her skill could keep her alive for at least a while. While Fiora was designed to fight only one person at a time, her impressive skill can cut zombies down like butter. If cornered, she can try to dash away, but would likely be grabbed and bitten. Her mobility is her only defense and it is not enough to survive a horde of thousands. If it was a small outbreak, she would surely win, but in a world ruled by the dead, fencing is merely a waste of time. Final Rank: 4

Fizz: Fizz is an incredibly agile fighter, slippery and deadly. His passive translates into the real world to me through being unable to be grabbed by zombies, an invaluable skill. While his weapon isn’t ideal for zombie killing, it is certainly passable, especially in his talented heads. Finally, Fizz’s mobility is well-suited to getting away from zombies and living through any attack he finds himself in. And if all else fails, he could always simply live underwater, and survive easy there. Final Rank: 9

Galio: Now this one is going to make the assumption that the zombies were created by magic because it makes it easier for Galio to stomp. Galio is a giant made of stone, clearly not vulnerable to zombie bites or grabs. His stature makes killing zombies all the easier, despite his abilities not being tailored to the task. Finally, the reason for asking the zombies to be magic for this scenario is that Galio would make it his personal mission to cleanse the whole world of the zombie menace and he would travel wide and far until the job is complete. Final Rank: 10

Gangplank: The Saltwater Scourge relies heavily on powder kegs, aka explosives which are relatively weak against the undead. However, he is highly skilled with his gun and flaming sword, and could rack up headshots and decapitations pretty well. His largest advantage though is his pirate ship, which when staffed by a full crew could keep him well protected for a long time. Final Rank: 5

Garen: The Might of Demacia might not be enough in this case. His sword is massive and could clearly cleave zombies in two, but actually killing them is a whole other matter. He is similar to Darius, but without the suicidal tendencies. However, his weapon is a little less suited to the task at hand, though helmsplitters will still do the job. Overall, strong but not unstoppable. Final Rank: 8

Gnar: Much like Mundo, Gnar is a big guy, brought low by a threat he can’t comprehend. In tiny form, his maneuverability would keep him safe for a bit, though ineffective against zombies. (boomerangs can’t decapitate or crack skulls) When he turns Mega though, he becomes more effective at killing due to pure strength, but all it takes is one bite to bright him down. Even if he survives his first transformation, he would likely find himself in a bad situation, exposed and unable to escape. Final Rank: 3

That's all I have for now, but I intend to update again soon. If you read this far, thanks, I really appreciate it. I'm mostly just doing this when I can't sleep from insomnia, but I hope someone sees it and likes it.