[Champion Concept] Kumori, the Shadow of Ionia

Buttèred Biscuit·6/10/2017, 3:43:40 AM·4 votes·748 views

Short Lore

Kumori is a ninja of the Eye of Twilight and is a pupil of Shen. While leading a group of students for a normal escort mission they were ambushed by rebels, in which all but Kumori were killed. He, himself lost his right eye and left arm, both being replaced by augmentations thanks to Viktor of Zaun. He returned to the village, along with his fallen comrades, and even though the mission was a failure was hailed as a hero, though Kumori didn’t care, but only for making sure that no one else would die under his lead, even though he knows this is impossible. After hearing this, Shen told him he was ready to protect the Eye of Twilight, but achieving true balance in oneself might take even longer.

Long Lore “Balance is key”

Growing up in Ionia was never the easiest, but compared to other places in Runeterra, there was nothing to complain about. With the threat of invading forces almost every day, most Ionians kept their guard up just in case such an incident happened. Most of the citizens always wondered why their nation was a highly painted target, whether it be the resources their lands hold or the fact that most of the people knew how to fight and are seen as a threat. Whatever the reason may be the constant threat of invading forces becomes second nature to them to the point that almost everyone was trained in some way to hold their own against any enemy they might encounter. If you were born in the lower districts it might be learned from your parents passing down knowledge from ancestors, or the higher districts were it was more common to be trained to a master of a certain art. But no matter what training you were given the tensions between districts were fairly loose as the people knew that in-fighting would never solve problems and corrupt governments would never prosper.

Kumori, once a pupil of Shen's father, before the Incident, he then became Shen's pupil. Kumori was taught all about the Eye of Twilight and hoped that one day would become a protector of such a wonder, but first, he must prove himself to maintain balance within himself and even then would only be considered for such an honor. Kumori trained endlessly with Kennen, Akali, and occasionally Shen in which he picked up on a few fighting styles from each master. Kennen with his shuriken’s, Akali with her stealth, and Shen and his abilities with a sword, he promised himself to excel at all of these in order to become the perfect ninja. It would take months upon months, and with his training coming to a close Shen noticed that the boy still lacked balance within himself and decided to tasked Kumori with a simple escort mission with a few other students from different dojo’s; however, as simple it seemed what happened during their days of travels would change Kumori for the rest of his life.

Halfway during the transport, they were attack by a rebel faction that sought the disruption of peace between the two nations. Kumori and the other students dug in, surrounding the VIP, ready to lay down their lives. The fighting lasted for days, their rations becoming dangerously low as the enemy relayed on run and hit tactics, making near impossible for the students and Kumori to rest. Until one night no attack came, still on edge Kumori told the rest of them to get rest while he kept watch, and even though he was tired the mission came before his personal needs. That morning they all agreed to continue the mission, hoping the rebels had given up their assault. They backed their belongings and headed out towards the direction of the ally nation; Kumori himself lagged behind making sure no threats ambushed them from behind. He did a head count and even though no one lost their life, it did seem strange that the rebels didn’t manage to kill a single person, unless their tactic was to tire them. Sudden realization racked Kumori’s body, but before he could warn the others to be ready for another ambush, an explosion erupted at the front of the caravan, the front wagons and several men caught in the explosion, as the rebels rained down from the canopy above. The rest of the surviving students tried to defend them off, but lack of sleep and food had weakened them and they were slaughtered like sheep. Blood soaked the ground as Kumori watched in horror as countless bodies hit the ground. He snapped out of it as a rebel ran towards him, he parried the attack as he drew his sword, following a slash across the man’s stomach, he threw two kunai in the man’s skull just to make sure he was dead. The body fell to the ground as Kumori took a defensive position, he wasn’t going to die today, and he was going to make sure of that.

Weeks after the ambush Kumori had delivered the dead body of the VIP, along with the students, back to Ionia. Dried blood caked his hair, his left arm missing, and a giant wound running from his brow through his right eye to the cheekbone was slowly bleeding, but somehow he returned the deceased back to their homes as he collapsed from exhaustion at the gates of his hometown. People held him as a true warrior, but that didn’t matter to Kumori all that matter he must continue training in order to see that nobody else would die, but he also knew that wasn’t possible. He told Shen this and his master laid a hand on his shoulder, wincing as his new augmentation was still sore, and told him that he was ready protect the Eye of Twilight. Even though he would never achieve the balance of his master, he would strive to follow in Shen’s footsteps.

Silence is Golden

Kumori kept to the shadows as he walked silently through the palace. Intel told him of a faction ready to attack Ionia and that they were holed up in hidden palace deep in the forests. Finding the place wasn’t the hard part, actually reaching the destination was the toughest as the rebels had laid booby traps all around the perimeter to prevent any intruders. However they didn’t expect Kumori as his right eye could detect even the best laid traps due to his robotic eye thanks to Viktor of Zaun. Even though Ionia didn’t trust the people of Zaun, they paid the Herald of Machines a nice sum to insure his new eye and arm were not only combat ready but didn’t feel so foreign. Both augmentations took months to get used to, but it was worth the wait.

Making his way toward a low hanging window, jumping to grab the sill, and pulled himself inside taking careful to make as little noise as possible. Kumori kept his ears open for any sounds as he scanned his area. He had entered a narrow hallway both ends leading to doors, but only the one that lead south had a faint light emitting from it and faint sounds of clinking glasses. Ever so quietly, his footsteps barely making a whisper, he crept toward the light. Going through the doorway it lead to another passage to the right as the walls had doors ever few feet between them, but only one had the light shining through. His back up against the wall he sidestepped until he reached the doorframe and listened. The sounds of laughter and banter filled his ears as the rebels in the room held a small party, probably to get ready to attack a caravan of army supplies.

“Wrecked’em? Damn near killed him!” one man joked. Laughter filled the room as he finished his joked.

“That’s pretty funny, man. Got any more?” another asked.

As the man began to tell another joke, Kumori noticed movement at the other end of the hallway. A man carrying a bottle of sake was heading towards the party. He looked pretty distracted as he didn’t notice Kumori jump up to the rafters.

“Oh man, I hope they didn’t start without me,” he inquired.

The rebel was about two feet from the door, before Kumori dropped in front of him and with deadly quickness sliced his throat open.

“Oh, you won’t be missing much,” Kumori whispered.

The man tried to speak but only blood spilled from his wound. Stepping to one side, he let the dying man fall face first in front of the doorway as the bottle of sake smashed against the ground.

“What was that?” asked one man. “Look at the door! Is that Iro?” another asked.

One of the men stood up and ran to the lifeless body never noticing Kumori to his right.

“Who the hell did this?” he asked. “I did.” Kumori stated.

The man’s head snapped to the side as the sudden voice spooked him. Before he could yell in protest, three shuriken made contact with his skull. Shouting came from the room as they saw their comrade die in front of them. Before any of them could move toward the door Kumori had appeared in the room the yelling stopped as it turned into stunned silence.

“It’s Kumori! The Shadow of Ionia,” one of them shouted.

The rebels jumped to their feet weapons ready. No one moved an inch after that.

“Well? I’m waiting,” Kumori stated.

One of the rebels yelled as he charged for Kumori and just as it seem he would pierce the man’s stomach; Kumori blocked the blade to one side with blinding speed. Metal rang against metal as the two men exchanged sword play. It was clear that Kumori was better skilled at the sword and when he saw his moment grabbed the rebel’s sword with his robotic arm. The man was caught off guard, but was even more surprised as Kumori clenched his fist breaking the sword into pieces and what happened next the man didn’t know, because his stomach was sliced in half at the waist and was dead before he hit the ground. The other rebels charged, but Kumori dashed forward cutting down a few more in his wake. As blood sprayed from their wounds they fell to the ground and more men filled their places, Kumori blocked one sword with his sword and the other with his forearm. Shoving the swords to one side he quickly dispatched the men with two strokes of his swords. Another rebel came from behind and Kumori turned throwing a black egg into his eyes. The blinding powder did its work as the man screamed and scratched at his eyes and a blade pierced his heart. Lifting his robotic arm, three shuriken’s flashed between his fingers as he let them fly into the nearest throats. He ducked as another sword swung for his neck and kicked his attacker’s feet from under him making him fall toward the ground, but before he could hit, Kumori smashed his wind pipe with a solid punch to the throat. Jumping to his feet Kumori surveyed the room and during the skirmish more men had showed, their weapons drawn.

“This is taking too long,” Kumori thought. “Guess it’s time to wrap things up.”

In one instant Kumori was standing in the middle of the room, in another he was gone. The remaining rebels stood there waiting for the man to reappear. A sudden blur was seen across the room as it bounced between one man to another, a small prick was felt by each person, causing them to stand motionless. Kumori suddenly appeared in the exact same spot as if he didn’t move, except for his drawn sword which was cover in blood. Sweeping his blade to one side the blood was flung off as he slowly sheathed his sword. The metal rubbing against the sheath sounded ten times louder as it slowly moved towards the guard. There was a brief pause as the sword was sheathed to the guard until finally making a clang as the sword was replaced. The room was filled with one unified gasp of pain as each rebel saw a wound magically appear on them, spraying blood and in mere seconds bled to death before crumbling to a heap on the floor. Komuri walked towards the doorway, before he reached down to grab a cup of sake; bringing it up to his lips he knocked his head back as he drank.

“Never buy the cheap stuff.”

Kumori’s Kit

Melee/Ranged Assassin/Fighter Jungler/Top/Mid

**Passive: Shadow of Ionia ** Shadow of Ionia Kumori becomes invisible when he’s close to a wall. (Think of Talia’s passive, but stealth) He gains flat movement speed and once he moves a set distance away becomes visible. He does not become invisible if he is in combat; however, once out of combat he turns invisible automatically. Any kind of damage will reveal him.

             Bionic Eye
             While in stealth Kumori can reveal and disable traps in a set radius; however, this only works for him, his allies will not see the traps nor are they disabled for them.

Q: Sword Play/Shuriken Throw

             Sword Play/ Stance/ 5 second Cool down:
             Passive: Auto Attacks Become Melee
             Active: Skill switches to Shuriken Throw

             Shuriken Throw/Stance/ 10 Energy Per Attack/ 5 second cool down:
             Passive: Auto Attacks Become Ranged; Gain Bonus AD Percentage.
             Active: Skill Switches to Sword Play

W: Black Egg/ 60 Energy/ 11-7 second cool down/ 500 Range Line/ 150 Range Cone Throw a black egg in a straight line, it explodes once it hits a champion or maximum range, then powder goes forward in a cone blinding anyone in it. Blind is similar to Teemo’s; however, it does no damage and blinds for 1/1.5/2/2.5/3 seconds. Hitting 1 enemy champion restores 20, additional champions after that restore 10 each. So 60 Energy total if 5 people are blinded.

**E: Dashing Blade/Kunai Assault ** Dashing Blade/ 90 Energy/ 15-7 second Cool down: Active: Dash forward in a straight line dealing damage. The first Champion hit takes full damage and any champions hit after the first only take 40% of the damage. Hitting the first champion restores 30 Energy and champions hit after the first restore only 15 each. Skill can only be used in Sword Play Stance

      Minions/Monsters are only dealt 60% damage.

      Kunai Assault/ 80 Energy/ 15-7 Second cool down/
      Active: Leap backwards in a set distance, while doing so throw 2/3/4/5/6 Kunai in a cone each one does its own damage. Only Champions can be hit and each kunai stops after the first enemy hit. This can only be used in Shuriken Throw stance

R: Elite Swordsmanship When activated Kumori blinks to all enemy champions within a given range near him, think of Yi’s Alpha Strike, but only targets champions in a giant AoE circle. After hitting all enemy champions Kumori goes back to his original position and channels his ult for 3.5/3/2.5 seconds. Enemy champions are rooted for 2 seconds. If Kumori finishes the channeling each enemy champion takes 100% of the ults damage; however, if the channel is interrupted they take 40%/50%/60% of the damage instead.

Because of Kumori's Q this does mean he can use melee only items and ranged only items; however, the ranged only passives don't work in melee and vice versa.


Major Edits Drained some power from his Q, making it only a switchable stance. Took the Q actives and made them into his E as he previous E didn't fit the Ninja aspect of his kit. Drained some power from his Ult when interrupted, insuring that his early game didn't out right execute squishies even if they were able to prevent his full damage.

5 Comments

ModEchoing6/15/2017, 5:08:07 PM1 votes

No one's left any feedback, so I'll help out.

Pros: -Awesome stealth passive - very ninja! -Pretty coherent playstyle -Very well balanced overall in terms of game health -Ult is pretty cool - skewed in your favor but still allows a chance at counterplay

Cons: -Is literally Genji -Probably the Q that makes him literally Genji -Shuriken/Kunai/Throwing Weapon E is, as you described, a literal Vel'Koz ult - why? -The most impactful part of the lore - him getting new limbs - is glossed over completely. You know Zaun's nowhere near Ionia, right?

Suggestions:

There's not much to improve on except the Q. With how his kit works, ranged attacks just don't feel like the right answer and end up bringing on Genji comparisons. The ranged E is also pretty suicidal, so that doesn't help - rooting yourself in place given what the rest of the kit wants you to do means you're going to get torn up.

I'd suggest just ditching ranged attacks entirely and doubling down on melee. Don't have the E duration extend with levels - increase its damage instead. By extending the duration you're spreading out the damage it's dealing over that period, which is not optimal since 3 seconds is already a long enough period for an assassin to hang near someone.

Also, if you're insisting on numbers, I'd recommend that instead of, say, a blind for 1/1/2/2/3 seconds, you even it out to 1/1.5/2/2.5/3 seconds so the even levels don't feel bad.

Hope to see more from you! Make sure you review other champions for bonus points!

Billcurme6/17/2017, 10:48:25 AM1 votes

Hey oh! Billcurme here! I see that I'm not the only Ionian Ninja in this CCOS, so I thought I'd drop by and give you my 2 cents! Hope my words are able to help you out. If not, feel free to ignore them! :D

I'll break this down so it's easy to digest.

Lore: Okay, I'm gonna go right ahead and say that I do not know the lore for Ionia and the Kinkou order very well. I crammed my way through a lot of it so that I could write my own lore, but my knowledge is far from perfect. Also, while some are comparing this to Genji, I... have no idea who that is. I'm aware he's a cyborg-like guy from Overwatch, but that's about it. So I'll be judging the lore (and kit) on it's own merits, and not through comparison to characters I don't know.

The lore seems interesting, but I'm afraid their are a few holes in it, from what I can tell from my own meagre knowledge. First of all, it is my understanding that the reason the Noxus invasion of Ionia was such a big deal was because Ionia wasn't attacked a lot. Noxus invaded because Ionia preferred the pursuit of art and pleasure over combat, so Noxus saw them as an easy target.

After the initial paragraph, we get into territory I do not know very well. I'm just going to point out that in the current lore, Shen is part of the Kinkou Order: a Triumvirate where three warriors are tasked with keeping the balance in their own job and rights. Shen, as The Eye of Twighlight, has the sacred duty of Watching the Stars: exercising judgement untainted by prejudice, and keeping balance between all things. Shen even carries around two swords (one for killing spirits, one for humans, all Witcher Style) so that he can keep balance between mortals and spirits as well as good and evil, or law and chaos. Honestly, I don't mind Kumori being a student of Master Kusho, or even Shen himself: I just think you might want to screw his lore to fit better with our current understanding. (I want to stress again that I may be wrong about the lore! This is not my Forte!) One that might be an interesting angle to take could be that Kumori wishes to become the next Eye of Twighlight, but is being held back by his desire to become it, or his pride. I don't know for sure. It's your story man.

Other than that, I don't see much else wrong with the lore. I am a little baffled that Kumori would go to Zaun to get his new arm and eye. Remember that Zaun mercenaries were hired by Noxus to unleash absolute horrors on Ionia. The Ionian's don't particularly care for Zaun.

Next, as there are no stats written up, I'll move onto the kit!

Kit: Shadow of Ionia (innate): I do like the idea of wall stealth. It is a neat and fun idea that could add spice to the league. My only concern is that I believe I saw a leak at one point that said the Evelynn rework was going to have a passive that was essentially this. As I cannot find that leak at the moment, I will dismiss this as me being paranoid, but it's just something to keep in mind. Still, all in all, I think this is a neat passive. I also like the ability for him to sneak past traps that are near him while he's wall-crawling.

Sword Play/Shurikan Throw (q): Alright, I read in your comment to Echoing that you really like champions that can freely switch their attacks between ranged in melee. This is a tried-and-true technique that a few champs have, but I'll warn you to take a look at those champions: All three of them sacrifice their Ult in order to have this ability. Elise, Jayce, and Nidalee all have their ult replaced with their stance-switching ability. That is because the power to switch between ranged and melee attacks is actually pretty dangerous. It makes your champion less predictable, and gives him access to new abilities. The fact that your stance ability is not only a basic ability, but also adds on an activated ability makes this a pretty strong and terrifying power. I hate to repeat what Echoing said, as you have already responded to him with your rebuttal, but I do think that this champ idea would benefit from a more definite direction. If you absolutely can't part with this identity though, I'd suggest either moving this ability to your ult slot, or toning it down a fair amount.

Black Egg (w): Okay, I really like this ability. It fits with the his character, his play style, and is an allusion to actual ninjutsu and similar stealth techniques. Well done here, my friend. Wish I had thought of this one XD

Blades of Fury/Kunai Assault (e): My biggest concern here is that these abilities are nearly identical, with Kunai assault having a longer range length-wise, where as Blades of Fury has a better width. As an added concern, I fear that these abilities hew a little too to Corki's Gatling Gun and Rumble's Flamespitter. Also, with how your portraying Kumori, I feel like wildly swinging his sword or throwing Kunai like a mad-man doesn't really add on to the graceful and precise Ninja.

Elite Swordmanship (r): :D Okay, I really like this one. It is a little hard to prevent the damage if you're caught in the area, but it does have some counter-play. My only real concern is that it's a guaranteed kill if you hit low-health squishes with it, as the damage from being interrupted still seems like it'd be pretty high. However, that is just nit-picking now. All in all, a really cool and thematic ability. I like it.

Summary of Thoughts: Through out the entire champ idea, I can't help but find myself wishing for a little more clarity of direction. I really like the idea in general, and feel that it is a strong and interesting character. I just almost feel like you tossed a bunch of ideas into a hat, and instead of picking one or two, just put the hat on your head and ran with it. Still, I think you've got a great start. I'd suggest ironing out some of the kinks I highlighted above, and of course listening to your other reviewers: most know what their talking about. Also, I'm no master of numbers, but if you ever feel like churning out some numbers for damage, stats, and the like, I'd suggest looking at similar champions, and trying to work your own out from their.

Best of luck with the CCOS!

-Billcurme-

Billcurme7/1/2017, 11:07:49 PM1 votes

I think all I can really say is "I'm Sorry." While I had intended to help you with my review, apparently some of the judges strongly disagree with the changes I suggested, and that costed you points for the contest. I greatly apologise for this. I had intended to help out, but apparently that was my mistake. I hope you can forgive me of my error, and I wish you nothing but the best for the future of Kumori.

-Billcurme-