I'm Sorry, LoL Community. I'm Sorry, Riot Games.
It's embarrassing to admit this but I have a flaming problem.
I go full blown tilt way too hard, way too often, for things that just aren't that big of a deal in this game. I did it to the point where I got a two week suspension, and this, as well as some other realizations in my life, have allowed me to conclude that I need to be a more positive person, even (and especially) in a place that CAN be toxic. But I have to be an agent of change, rather than add to that problem like I have been.
So, today begins my two week suspension. I will be using that time to reflect, play other games, get more work done, and come back to play this game with a better overall mindset. That being said, I know that I can still be tilted from time to time, and I aim to start practicing how NOT to tilt more often. Taking breaks after each game, taking deep breaths, etc, and I've chosen no longer to use the chat function to much capacity.
Note that this is in no way me excusing my behavior. However, since this has come up, I do feel like a permanent ban in a game where chat bans could exist indefinitely seems a bit confusing. If the people typing are an issue, and you take that away, you may say "oh they'll run it down mid". But isn't that much easier to ban, and much more justifiable? Mean words are absolutely impactful and that is why I will be doing my share to longer use them to a great deal. That being said, the fear of losing an account that I have spent a lot of valuable time and money on is a bit frightening. Mostly because the suspension came after a chat restriction, but no "smaller ban". I was immediately put into the red zone and about to be removed. I feel that's a bit extreme, especially when muting a player for hundreds of games or indefinitely or even just for a season seems like a much more constructive way to improve the League community rather than just "removing tumors" in a way. But I'm definitely open to thoughts.