Funny things to Say in Game
I will come up with more, I promise, but here are some starters. When someone is being salty, say "Would you like some pepper with your salt?" I find it personally funny!
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my first game of the day I always open to my team with "ahh nothing like a cup of league and a game of joe in the morning"
So many flavors 
and you choose to be salty 
Turn on your TV's, the Spanish Inquisition is happening!
Regarding salt, I like "So salty he could send someone into cardiac arrest," and "So salty they call him 'the pacific ocean'."
In general, "brb gotta go my fish are drowning" or "sorry gotta afk my pool is on fire" is a classic.
if you're sona, whenever someone tells you to do something, reply with "..."
Namaste Brethren
Say "Reported." Every time someone says or does ANYTHING even remotely rude.