Boards›[ARCHIVED] Miscellaneous

If the Boards were an Ice Cream Shop.

ThePartyLeader··72 votes·2,589 views

I am making the assumption people use English and not whatever language most people use on the boards is.

Rito. Last month I ate a vanilla cone at your store. I decided today I don't like vanilla. Give me my money back? That new flavor looks better.

Rito I like chocolate shakes. That guy over there has an Oreo shake. Please take Oreo shakes off the menu. If you can't do that you need to at least cut the amount of oreos in the shake down to 0. Its just not fair.

Rito I love your ice cream. But you won't let me eat it. Let me explain to you my situation. This guy was eating a Sundae with sprinkles on it. SPRINKLES! He looked at me and said that if I wanted one I shouldn't have ordered an Oreo shake.( since your didn't take oreos out of the shake I was forced to eat it or feel left out) Now he was looking at me all smug so I flipped his table and punched some random guy in the nose then told him only 5 year old get sprinkles on Sundaes. Then a officer told me I can not go back to your store. I don't understand why. Who gets sprinkles and acts all superior like that?

Rito Ice cream sucks. Why aren't you a frozen custard store. I like other things you don't have also.

Thank you!

45 Comments

Laughing Fish34 votes

http://img.pandawhale.com/101430-Riddler-reddit-upvote-gif-Jim-28W7.gif

Stephenizgod1 votes

http://ak-hdl.buzzfed.com/static/2014-09/9/8/enhanced/webdr07/anigif_enhanced-buzz-4384-1410266512-26.gif

Ima just hijack your comment so i can post this:

http://37.media.tumblr.com/a90ad358b6a39b299db345cabb1963e2/tumblr_n2b0szUpUJ1rpn9eno3_500.gif

ThePartyLeader27 votes

Rito That guy gets a free shake at the end of the year because he ate so much ice cream. I could eat that much ice cream also but you make my ice cream heavier and the people that you make me sit with don't even know how to use a spoon. I deserve that shake.

Auryiel2 votes

omg that one is too good

TurquoiseYoshi10 votes

Rito, I just came back to your shop after 3 years. My favorite flavor from 3 years ago (Oreo) is now not as good as Chocolate. Why do you make Chocolate so good? It's not fair that you make Chocolate so good and be so much better than my old favorite. Now Oreo is worthless and needs to be better. Also why do you let people have cones? All of the people when I used to come here got cups, so why are cones better now?

Based off of a true story.

Nicktoons1 votes

I understand the ice cream is the champ, what is the cone being compared to?

ThePartyLeader1 votes

Not putting words in his mouth but my thoughts would be cones being more mobile than cups. Tp meta or just mobility creep. Or he just hates ice cream cones.

TurquoiseYoshi1 votes

Lemme try to remember what the hell I was thinking...

OH YEAH! This guy (he made a post a few days ago) was complaining about 2 major things. 1: That he lost a Vlad vs Fiora matchup (as mentioned, he hadn't played in 3 years, so Vlad not being OP and reworked Fiora was new to him) 2: Skillshots are too prominent, and point-and-clicks are too rare. One that he hated was Veigar's new Q.

ShinobisDemon7 votes

this made my life ^_^

ThePartyLeader2 votes

Glad I could help!

L Rayquaza6 votes

No, the favorite flavor isn't chocolate, it is salted caramel

ThePartyLeader19 votes

CertainlyT designed salted Carmel using real summoner tears.

Excitidly Insane15 votes

Tears that also went in to cooking Zed's noodles.

http://img.ifcdn.com/images/aa2502dead08f8d2a660a08c095b015601ed75aa596ef1ef1953521bd32cf5b5_1.jpg

Although specifically midlaner summoner tears.

lakeyja9001 votes

Zed won lane against Amumu mid

frigginmurlocs2 votes

Everyone wins lane against amumu mid

Excitidly Insane1 votes

Zed collected so many tears from Amumu he boiled noodles for his entire team and carried them all with noodle power.

For Carthage6 votes

While this grossly oversimplifies a lot of legitimate and valid arguments...

The sarcasm and cleverness is too well done not to applaud.

ThePartyLeader1 votes

Thank you!

manbearswine1 votes

[{quoted}](name=For Carthage,realm=NA,application-id=cIfEodbz,discussion-id=FAHB3pyI,comment-id=0009,timestamp=2015-10-25T20:06:16.909+0000)

While this grossly oversimplifies a lot of legitimate and valid arguments...

The sarcasm and cleverness is too well done not to applaud.

I disagree,it misses the whole point of those statements.

I mean giving probably the most obvious example,back in late s2-early s3,taric was stupidly overpowered. Couldn't get people to ban him,because people won't ban a support unless it has a hook(or is tham apparently). Playing him was horrible,he was(and still is) an incredibly boring piece of shit. Playing against him was even worse,the guy had to be a complete moron to lose,and getting facerolled by overpowered shit isn't fun at all.

Champions compare to each other,making a better ice cream won't make old flavors bad,making new(or old) overpowered champions WILL make older(or less "supported",whatever) champions feel a lot worse to play.

The thread is bad,completely misses the point of very valid concerns,and actually makes no good comparisons or points whatsoever.

frigginmurlocs2 votes

You must be fun at parties

manbearswine1 votes

{quoted}

You must be fun at parties

I'm getting tired of people calling shit comparisons as funny,at least have some merit to them.

Yorukin5 votes

Rito Your spoons suck. Fix them please. ...What? Are you expecting to say what exactly I don't like about them or something? Silly Rito, why should I have to do that? The customer is always right, you should know this.

ThePartyLeader5 votes

Rito I heard you now can dip my ice cream in chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry. I like this as it adds a little bit of color and flavor to my ice cream without all the razzmatazz of those fancy variations. Thanks. I went to get chocolate dipped in vanilla and was told it cost money. Really?! You just have to dip it. I mean I could do that at home in like sub 3 seconds. As a long time lover of your delicious dairy delicacies I am appalled at your greed.

What do you think I am? Made of loose change?

PhDs Nuts5 votes

What's a dude sprinkle? I don't want that anywhere near my ice cream.

ThePartyLeader5 votes

Punctuation matters and apparently I'm terrible at it.

Sweetie Brella5 votes

Rito

I used to love the Strawberry Fudge Sundae you made, even though it wasn't a popular menu item. When I heard you decided to use a new recipe I was excited but a little worried. It turned out that most of the ingredients were clearly of inferior quality and you used too much wafer. When we brought up these complaints, you decided to replace even more of the original sundae with wafer, and stuck the wafer in even further. That isn't what we enjoyed about the Sundae originally!

We've repeatedly told you about these problems but no one wants to talk to us about it. Hell, the guy in charge of the decision hasn't been seen in over a year. We keep bringing this up because we care about the Strawberry Fudge Sundae and we honestly believe if we worked together we could make it great again.

68419865 days later

Rito: There are currently no plans to change the recipe. We definitely know exactly what we're doing.

(Sorry if this is against the original point of this message, this is still a sticking point for me).

Remlap12234 votes

Rito

I wanted a banana split with a cherry on it. I've been asking for it forever, and then you ruined it by putting two cherries on top. You completely ruined the banana split because the cherries now completely overwhelm the taste so much that I can't eat any other thing besides that. I **DEMAND ** that banana split now be without bananas, chocolate sauce, and ice cream, and for fuck's sake can you do what I fucking asked for once and leave just one goddamn cherry?

Rito never makes banana splits right.

(In case any of you don't get the joke, I'll give you a hint Veigar)

Ultimatesplash4 votes

The satire in this post is lovely. 10/10

ThePartyLeader3 votes

Glad you enjoy the flavor!

Saphixia4 votes

Rito I really want your brown-coloured vanilla icecream but i am a couple of cents short i drew this icecream so you can give me the extra money http://www.chickensmoothie.com/oekaki/image/image.php?id=216172&size=large&format=auto&rev=1287690470 thankyou

ThePartyLeader2 votes

Rito give this person a job!

ThePartyLeader3 votes

I have yet to correctly spell a title on the first try.

Lord Boltrix2 votes

Well played Party, well played.

Slamurai Jack2 votes

The second guy is the worst. "Champs I never play are annoying so why doesn't Rito just gut them?"

Stephenizgod2 votes

Rito

Cake is better.

http://cdn.smosh.com/sites/default/files/bloguploads/nom-harvey-dent.gif

DJColdCutz1 votes

Sundae*

ThePartyLeader3 votes

Auto correct doesn't like Sundaes with sprinkles either apparently. Thanks for the catch!

DJColdCutz2 votes

No prob. Another analogy for you to use: Rito reveals a new flavor of ice cream and has a private taste test for a select group of customers. Everyone who tries a sample gets sick because the flavoring is too strong. "Rito, there is a problem with this flavor. It is too strong, and it is making everyone sick. People are bedridden after trying this flavor. You need to tweak the flavor before you release it to the public." Rito ignores the warnings and release the flavor as is, and many people die.

kaltenashes1 votes

damn, Better tweak Irelia

Rikari1 votes

I think i'm the only clueless guy here...

ThePartyLeader4 votes

Diversity is important!

Hello I am Bird1 votes

If the Boards were an Ice cream shop... I would leave. And find another Ice Cream shop. Unless they got the special flavor of Dank maymays.

KnivingDude1 votes

Posting on an epic thread.

ThePartyLeader1 votes

Getting a reply on an epic thread?

Viking Shadow1 votes

I was expecting something about pralines and dick. To be honest, kinda disappointed

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