EVERY CHAMPION IN THIS GAME IS BROKEN (A's)
Leauge is filled with nothing but a bunch of HYPOCRITES. You heard me HYPOCRITES. Everyones always complaining about "X" champion being completely unfair for "Y" reason, it's sad really.
Well here's a news flash for all of you: "All the champions in this gods forsaken game are broken!"
So if you'll sit down and refrain from typing in your 10 paragraph essay about how your champion is "balanced", I'll learn y'all about why you're all abusing toxic and/or freelo champions.
(IF YOU ACTUALLY TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY YOU SHOULD SEEK MEDICAL ATTENTION IMMEDIATELY)
So following normal customs I'll format this comprehensive list in ABC Order, feel free to skip to any section of this list!
SECTION: A
*AATROX - the DEMON NO ONE REMEBERS: One of the biggest offenders in this game. Infinite healing with his braindead W, and a second life on his passive makes fighting him impossible. Anyone who says this clearly broken pile of filth deserves a buff is 100% scum. They just want the community to think Aatrox is bad just so they can continue abusing this freelo champion.
Classification: FORGOTTEN YET BROKEN DEMON
*AHRI - the PORNSTAR: Stupid anime fox demon engineered by Riot Game weebs for the sole purpose of growing their hentai community. Annoying Q spam that pushes waves infinitely, Annoying E that acts as the games best CC (makes you walk towards her, are you fucking me right now?!), and an autistic ultimate that makes her ungankable. Easy to abuse, never banned, always broken. That seems to line up with Ritos balance philosophy just right.
Classification: 3 DASH, INFINTE MOBILTIY HENTAI CHARACTER
*AKALI - the INSANE BURST ASSASSIN WITH INFINITE SUSTAIN: Retarded, No skill, Pseudo Faceroll champion. Not only does her Q do crazy damage, but it's on a 3-4 sec cooldown. Fair? Her W gives a free escape, and her Ulimate makes it virtually impossible to escape her while she's simutaniously making your HP disappear...LIKE MAGIC! Sound pretty bad? Pretty irritating? Well let's not forget that her passive gives her infinite sustain just for doing damage. Once again FLAWLESS design by Riots balence team, flawless (/joke). Classification: ONE-SHOT, HEALING ASSASSIN
*ALISTAR - the UNMILKABLE COWMAN: Nothing but a Brainless Animal, much like the people who play him. Flash E Q to win, literally all there is to this champion. No depth. No Mental Effort. No problem. Much like most support in this game ALISTAR has completely unfair CC, but don't worry the supports will all face justice soon.
CLASSFICATION: MINDLESS CC CHAIN MONSTER
*AMUMU - the FREINDLESS LOSER MUMMY Fuck this champion. Stun with Q. AOE stun with ULT. Retarded damage for someone that tanky. The bane of all assassins, fighters, and battlemages. Please remove this champion form the game Riot. He has no friends, no personality, and no fanbase.
CLASSIFICATION: NO ONE LIKES HIM, NO WONDER HES FREINDLESS
*ANIVIA - the WALL BUILDER BEFORE IT WAS COOL Trumps spirit champion. Builds walls, and butt rapes you if you get too close with her crazy E damage
(don't worry Trump supporters, Riot has graced us will Hillarys spirit champion as well. Can you take a guess?)
Why does Riot like creating champions that can oneshot you while simutaniously having you stun locked? Does this sound fair to anyone? Not only does her Q E end your career, but her W builds a wall which acts as terrain (basically another CC spell) and her Ult is a AOE slow + damage spell. Genius, simply genius. Prepare to have intensive aneurisms when you get deleted by her. I don't want to talk about her passive, it's basically a shittier version of Aatrox passive. So don't ask. OK?!
CLASSIFICATION: ICE BIRD WHO MAKES MY HP DISAPPEAR QUICKER THEN THE NEW YORK TIMES ENDORSEMENTS
*ANNIE - the FACILITATOR OF LEAUGE CHILDPORN While Annie wasn't created for the sole perpose of satisfying horny weebs like AHRI was, that doesn't stop the neckbeards from making some hentai on her anyway. She has assloads of damage just by pressing litterally two fucking buttons. Epitome of a noskill champion that can still delete you just by pressing basic abilities.
CLASSIFICATION: R W Q, OH LOOK AT THAT...im ded.
*ASHE - the SLOW BOT "What's better than a adc that already does a lot of auto attack damage? One that slows you indefinitely while they do it!" --Rito Game 2016
Infinite slows, Global Clarvoience, Global Stun that lasts an eternity. If you're bad at the game play Ashe, kinda hard to fuck that one up. This ones kinda small, just like Ashe players IQs.
CLASSIFICATION: SLOWS YOU TO DEATH, AND CROSS THE MAP STUNS YOU
*AURELION SOL - the LOW EFFORT FREELO KING I have a soft spot for Aurelion Sol, he's my main. Is he broken just like every other champion in this game...yes. Are you shit at farming? Press W. Are you Bronze V against a Diamond Mid laner? Press W. Are your teammates complete boosted trash? Press W...then roam bot lane. Freelo champion, shits on noobs, and the best part is no one complains he's busted in post lobby because most people are shit at him. P.S. The nerfs didn't do shit, don't lie to the people fellow Aurelion Sol enthusiasts.
CLASSIFICATION: PRESS W, ENJOY FREE LP
*AZIR - the SANDMAN WHO ALWAYS BULLIES YOU OUT OF LANE He was nerfed, but that doesn't change the fact that his Sandman slaves still do obnoxious damage. All he has to do is place his soldiers right on top of his minions, or on top of yours and there you go. You don't get to farm for the next 10 minuets. His E Ult combo is the one of the most overrated combos in the game, even a child could pull it off. The only thing difficult about Azir is the fact that he has to right click to do damage, but at the end of the day that's just like every other mindless ADC.
CLASSIFICATION: PRESSES W TO WIN
That concludes the end of the A's! The rest will be out periodically (I have too much free time).
Let me know of any grammatical errors, if that sort of thing REALLY bothers you.
