"Kat"

"Kat" (A parody of the song "Belle") Character Roles will be as follows: Belle=Katarina Gaston=Garen LeFou=Jarvan IV The Bimbettes= Quinn, Fiora, Lux Various Townsfolk= Ahri, Taric, Shyvana, Vi, Irelia, Jinx, Master Yi, Yasuo, Riven, Soraka, Ezreal, Akali, Ryze, Pantheon, Leona, etc.

Transcript

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: Little Rift, it's a quiet League Every game, like the one before Little Rift, full of little Champions Queuing up to say...

The following poke their heads out of the brush as Kat walks by

: Good Luck!

: Good Luck!

: Good Luck!

: Good Luck!

: Have Fun!

: There goes the Panth with his shield like always The same old stuns and spears to throw Every game is just the same Since the first game that we came to this poor, provincial Rift

She gets first blood

JG Pantheon comes mid

(Baker Skin): Good startoff, Kat!

: Hello, Pantheon.

: And where are you off to today?

: The Item Shop. I just saw the most wonderful item there, involving an armguard and a codex and it makes-

: That's nice. Leona! Let's gank top! Hurry up!

Kat walks off towards the shop as Pantheon ults towards top-lane, leaving Leona running after him

Nidalee, Syndra and Orianna are standing off to the side of the lane as she walks by

Gossiping Midlaners (, and ): Look, there she goes That girl is strange, no question She acts distracted, can't you tell?

: Never part of any fights.

Volibear pokes his head out of the jungle brush nearby

: She demands her farm-rate reach new heights.

Champions (Indistinct): No denying she's a funny girl that Kat.

Olaf walks by Kat

: Good Job!

: TY!

: How is your farming?

Miss Fortune walks by Gangplank and Illaoi

: Good Luck!

: TY!

: How is your life?

Gangplank gets smashed by a tentacle

Talon is at the shop, barely juggling all the Long Swords he's bought, and Jhin's nearby eyeing an Essence Reaver

: I need, more blades!

: That's too expensive.

Kat arrives as the two men walk away

: There must be more than this provincial Rift!

Shopkeeper: Ah, Kat.

: Good day, sir. I've come to exchange the Revolver I borrowed.

Shopkeeper: Farmed enough already?

: Oh, the minions couldn't keep me down. I'll buy... this one!

_She buys a _

Shopkeeper: That one? But Unique's don't stack twice!

: Well, it's my favorite. Ability Power, Damage reduction, Invulnerability, it works with my ult-

Shopkeeper: If you like it all that much, it's yours.

: But sir!

Shopkeeper: I insist!

: Well, thank you, thank you very much!

She walks off as , and approach the shop

All 3: Look, there she goes! That girl builds so peculiar I wonder if she's buying well.

Riven watches Kat as she passes by the brush she's hiding in

: With a cocky, snooty look!

Katarina skims the pages of the forbidden codex she bought for her Morellonomicon

Rengar watches from a different brush

: And her nose stuck in a book.

Champions (Indistinct): What a puzzle to the rest of us is Kat!

Kat arrives and starts farming the minions in Mid-lane while still reading the book

: Ahh... Isn't this amazing? It's my favorite part because, you'll see...

She shoves a minion's face in the book

: Here's... where it explains the AP boost, but you won't discover the CD reduce, till chapter 3...

Ahri is walking by with a charmed Taric

: Now it's no wonder that her skills are deadly Her passive's got no parallel.

: But behind that fair facade, I'm afraid she's rather odd. Very different from the rest of us.

Champions (Indistinct): She's nothing like the rest of us. Yes, different from the rest of us is Kat!

Garen and J4 are top-lane, and Garen ults, killing his lane opponent

: Wow, you didn't miss a kill, Garen! You're the greatest Juggernaut in the whole League!

: I know.

: No fighter alive stands a chance against you, Garen! And no girl for that matter.

: It's true, J4. And I've got my blade's edge pointed at that one!

He points towards mid-lane where has just killed her lane-opponent

: Huh? The Noxian General's daughter?

: She's the one. The lucky girl I'm going to lane with!

: But she's-

: The most whirlwind girl in town!

: I know but-

Garen brings his sword very close to J4's throat

: That makes her the best! And don't I deserve the best?

: Well, of course, I mean you do, and-

Garen pushes him over

: Right from the moment when I met her, saw her, I said she's gorgeous and I fell Here in Runeterra there's only she, who can spin as well as me So I'm making plans to woo and lane with Kat!

He Q's, heading for mid-lane, passing , and along his way

All 3: Look, there he goes, isn't he dreamy. Justice Garen, oh he's so cute! Be still, my heart, I'm hardly breathing. He's such a tall, strong, Justice-dispensing brute!

Garen runs into countless obstacles on his way to the mid-lane

: More stacks!

: Pardon!

: Move it!

: 'Scuse Me!

: I'll chop you up!

: Please let me through!

ults

: There must be more than this provincial Rift!

: Just watch, I'm going to make Kat my ship!

Champions (Indistinct): Look there she goes that girl who's strange but deadly A most peculiar champion It's a pity and a sin That build doesn't quite fit in She really is a funny girl A killer but a funny girl She really is a funny girl... that Kat!

EDIT: Minor correction, the cast was showing Sona as one of the Bimbettes, when it should have been Fiora. Fixed.