Pantheon is the greatest champion ever.

Cupkek·2/6/2015, 1:40:26 AM·11 votes·3,235 views

You there, with the skinny arms and weak constitution! Wanna be a man? Wanna cause people to flee at the very sight of your muscular, helmeted bod? Want to carry each and every one of your ranked games and be praised by your laners for your flawless, wholesome, meaty ganks?

Too bad. You can't.

But there's one guy who CAN!

PANTHEON. This spear 'n board meathead will wallop your enemies into next Thursday! All while lifting some dumbbells and downing a hearty beer.

Let's take a look into how this guy throbbing mass of testosterone gets it done:

  • -Passive ability: "Aegis Who needs Protection?" TAKE HEART AND RAISE THE MAN-SHIELD! Every 4 ability uses or auto-attacks, the glorious Mantheon will use his mighty phallus to completely block the next auto-attack of turret shot that hits him. Damage? What damage?

  • Q: "Spear Cheap Shot" The Mantheon hurls his spear with so much gooey, manly force that it bends the very laws of physics and always finds its target. Additionally, if Pantheon sees his target is lacking their precious precious lifeblood, he will become extremely aroused and his spear will surge forth and guarantee a critical hit.

  • W: "Erection of Zeonia" The anti-estrogen wreckingball known as Pantheon springs toward his target, slams his shield on their head, and dishes out a serious concussion. Pantheon, being the masochistic alpha-male that he is, immediately becomes thoroughly aroused and prepares to block the next incoming turret shot or autoattack with his massive dong.

  • E: "Heartseeker Strike Stabby-Stabby-Fun-Time" Pantheon, through sheer manliness, breaks the surly bonds of physics and obliterates anything within a short range in front of him by striking with his man-stick in a quick flurry. Less-manly champions than Pantheon (all of them) are struck for double damage.

  • R: "The Man-Drop" Summoning all of his muscular manergy (man + energy), Pantheon flips the bird to the laws of physics (again) and proceeds to F*CKING FLY. Upon finding a not-so-manly target, Pantheon will descend with the force of a SCUD missile, annihilating anything braindead enough to remain in the impact zone.

Out-man your opponents, play Pantheon today!

13 Comments

RiotRectifyer2/6/2015, 10:41:57 PM6 votes

You mean MANTHEON!

SuppaSNAFU2/6/2015, 6:14:18 AM1 votes

This. Made. My. Day. For the bakers!!

Astral Zephyroro2/6/2015, 10:51:37 PM1 votes

Who else is turned on after reading this? Ha ha....seriously guys? Not a single person? Really? Its only me?

Kuroi862/6/2015, 10:53:38 PM1 votes

Getting kicked into a well is the least of your problems!

zangager2/7/2015, 7:27:04 AM1 votes

And here we have the list of follow-uppers.

Including manly(but not manly as Mantheon) greats such as Draven Tryndamere JarvanIV Jayce Darius

And the ever-renowned Teemo

TheKingDodo2/7/2015, 8:26:11 PM1 votes

XinZhao ^ wannabe mantheon

Lost R2/10/2015, 5:40:37 PM1 votes

Braum Oh hi, I didn't see you there.

nightstaber2/6/2015, 2:18:49 AM1 votes

This should be exactly how pantheons moves should be described as this is the best m8