Why League Was Important To Me : And Why Now It Isn't

When my best friend got me into this game, I was super excited. The variety of champions and skins and play styles and options on how to build your guy was just befuddling to me. It was such a cool and fun concept, and even funner playing with my best friend. But after 2 years of normals and playing, me and my bud got into ranked. He was much more advanced then me at the time, and he was rocking a solid plat. status. And I tried playing my placement games but they fell victim to feeders and trolls. A bronze 3 placement was where I landed. But you know what? I didn't result to toxicity, I played the hell out of a position that I hated ( Support) and I carried myself, dragging up and down cold mud until I was silver 1. And finally I got gold, and I was so happy, I felt this huge burden lift off my shoulders, like i was free to play the game for fun with there whacky gamemodes and 5v5 all friends. But this season, I was placed into silver 2 and i was happy, I was so close to gold that in maybe a week I could reach it and not have to play ranked anymore for the year. But alas, 200 games in, all silver 2. I played 200 ranked games, and I was still silver 2. 1 win, 1 loss, 1 win, 1 loss. I tried every op technique, every lane, every op champ to try to win, but dynamic que killed me. How can i win against a team of 4 or 5 players in sinc and all friends? while im watched with people who would rather feed than try to win? it cant be done. And I know, why didn't I get my own friends to carry me. Well over the years Ive gotten horribly depressed, my girlfriend left me, my life has fallen no where, my career and passions have suffered and now im going broke. And so the only ever release I get from my loneliness and horror that has become my reality has been sleeping and playing league. And so when Im on the brink of silver 1 after 200 games played in silver 2, some dipshit bastard feeds for no reason, and in response I tell him kindly to just get back on the horse but still he feeds. So finally I cuss at him, as I usually would to feeders who feed just to make their teammates lose( this happens alot so I often get chat banned but usally I just stop talking for 20 games after that) and then somehow I carry the game and win for my team, but the guy reports me for toxicity and I get suspended for 2 weeks. 2 long weeks of starring out my window wishing I was dead. Riot, how could you let this happen? I check the guys account and he is still playing everyday, feeding half the games, and im the one punished? how could you do this to me riot? isnt a game about expressing yourself? isnt there a mute button? why isnt he suspended? why isnt he punished? Riot, you have caused me so much joy, but now I feel alone in my dark room, addicted to this game but cant play. Riot, I dont have anymore words for you.