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Why in the absolute mother fuck are all assassins so mother fucking safe

wLpHamiltion·Apr 12, 2019·12 votes·2,204 views

WHY DO THEY NEED 1000192348012398409285903487502384923840183409328750348950389-95034985209834875203489092384 WAYS TO GET OUT OF EVERY HORRIBLE DECISION?!??!?! This is supposed to be a HIGH risk HIGH reward class. Yet none of them are even remotely high risk. They are literally ZERO risk MASSIVE reward. Let's look at the assassin class champs:

Extremely safe with three dashes. Extremely safe with smokescreen and three dashes. Extremely safe with a dash and an extra life. Extremely safe with insane passive healing, invisibility and a get out of jail free ult. Two dashes, invulnerability. Infinite dashes. So many dashes and I don't even know where they come from. Dash on almost no cooldown and can go through walls (and heal for it on top of his already insane amounts of healing). Resetting dash and two or three casts of invisibility. Two dashes (four if you count the blink back, I would) Two dashes, invisibility. Two dashes. Low cooldown invisi-dash, removal from game with reappearance of two. Infinite dashes over terrain. Infinite dashes. Two/three/four dashes.

All of these champions can just fuck up, and it's okay, just dash away and try again in 10 seconds. I think it's time to realize that this class of champions is braindead, does NOT take skill, and is UNHEALTHY for the game. You wanna know why damage AND mobility creep exists? Look no further than this class of bullshit. If these champions didn't exist the game would be in a MUCH healthier state.

Bonus: Fuck this monstrosity of a bullshit champion, where putting him behind early game is just helping him get to late game fuckery bullshit faster.

34 Comments

Vulkus IApr 12, 20197 votes

Zed can only use two blinks in rapid succession buddy.

Genghis KhatApr 12, 20193 votes

[{quoted}](name=Vulkus I,realm=NA,application-id=3ErqAdtq,discussion-id=4FXvAir2,comment-id=0002,timestamp=2019-04-12T15:02:11.934+0000)

Zed can only use two blinks in rapid succession buddy.

two blinks true, rapid (lol no) can take multiple seconds. rapid could be considered 1 second :/

Vulkus IApr 12, 20191 votes

{quoted}

two blinks true, rapid (lol no) can take multiple seconds. rapid could be considered 1 second :/

I have M7 Zed and he's practically my second main, you can easily use both your W and R shadows in about ~1 second depending on if you threw your W out before ulting.

Genghis KhatApr 12, 20191 votes

[{quoted}](name=Vulkus I,realm=NA,application-id=3ErqAdtq,discussion-id=4FXvAir2,comment-id=000200000000,timestamp=2019-04-12T16:05:43.467+0000)

I have M7 Zed and he's practically my second main, you can easily use both your W and R shadows in about ~1 second depending on if you threw your W out before ulting.

well ye i didnt mean that. i meant as in you have a few seconds to use those blinks. you can use them fast but not ONLY fast. you said zed can ONLY use 2 dashes rapidly. and i meant you mean he has a short time window where he can use them. :p misunderstanding here.

NaalithApr 12, 20197 votes

If Poppy only Lulu there Janna were Lissandra champions Fiddlesticks who TahmKench could Soraka stop Taric them Malzahar

letsfeedtogetherApr 12, 20194 votes

fizz dosent have 2 dashes kata has 1 pyke has 1

MindzurApr 12, 20194 votes

Troll pole and whatever the fuck his dash through a champ/minion is. That's two.

letsfeedtogetherApr 12, 20192 votes

Troll pole?

HethaleanApr 12, 20191 votes

{quoted}

Troll pole?

Fizz E can be a dash.

letsfeedtogetherApr 12, 20191 votes

Its not a dash. He can move through the wall somw time because of the invulnerability

HethaleanApr 12, 20191 votes

{quoted}

Its not a dash. He can move through the wall somw time because of the invulnerability

Right, so I guess my question is are you being pedantic about the word 'dash' or do you not see it as a mobility spell? Because this is how wikia describes his E "DOUBLE CAST: Fizz dismounts his trident without pausing, allowing him to perform both dashes in a quick succession. " and "Both dashes may be directed separately." It really seems like it's a dash because he does a movement with a spell, and a well respected wikia site claims it is one.

Radiant SeraphApr 12, 20191 votes

E

IlovemobasApr 12, 20196 votes

{quoted}

Troll pole and whatever the fuck his dash through a champ/minion is. That's two.

leave Trundle out of this :(

Genghis KhatApr 12, 20196 votes

{quoted}

fizz dosent have 2 dashes kata has 1 pyke has 1

sorry but who upvoted you? kata has 3 dashes MINIMUM in her kit in one rotation, 18 if she goes on for a penta kill. pyke has 1 + 1 if he R's you and kills you (R resets so a maximum of 5), fizz does have 2 dashes. :/ 1 needing a target.

letsfeedtogetherApr 12, 20192 votes

kata has 1 dash built in her kit. and her dash can be "reset" if she dashes to a dagger or walk on one. it dosent mean she has more dashes. and her dashes are mostly not safe out side of her e it self.

pyke ult dash is ONLY when he hits a champion.. makes it 1 not safe MOST OF THE TIMES (the point of the post) and 2 not reliable.

fizz e isnt a dash. its an invulnerability,

Genghis KhatApr 12, 20194 votes

{quoted}

kata has 1 dash built in her kit. and her dash can be "reset" if she dashes to a dagger or walk on one. it dosent mean she has more dashes. and her dashes are mostly not safe out side of her e it self.

pyke ult dash is ONLY when he hits a champion.. makes it 1 not safe MOST OF THE TIMES (the point of the post) and 2 not reliable.

fizz e isnt a dash. its an invulnerability,

fizz E can be used as a dash.

and no katarinas kit has 3 dashes in one rotation. trust me .. i have 2.3million points in total. i think i might be right on this one ;)

letsfeedtogetherApr 12, 20191 votes

Like i said fizz e isnt a dash. He can move through walls becaue of the invulnerability.

And so what? I jusr faced a 1m points fizz that was really. Really. Bad. Points dosent mean everything

Genghis KhatApr 12, 20192 votes

{quoted}

Like i said fizz e isnt a dash. He can move through walls becaue of the invulnerability.

And so what? I jusr faced a 1m points fizz that was really. Really. Bad. Points dosent mean everything

fizz e can move through walls which makes it a dash with invulnerability.... like do you understand what you are saying

and to prove my knowledge of katarina let me tell you how she has 3 dashes in her kit.

E > W (resets E when you pick it up) > Q > E (to dagger and get another reset) > E

those are 3 dashes in one rotation which is in her kit mah dude. have fun :)

letsfeedtogetherApr 12, 20191 votes

You're right. My bad. Fizz e is through a dash. But i still do not agree about kata. Because her dashes arent safe mostly. And thats what the op was saying

Genghis KhatApr 12, 20191 votes

{quoted}

You're right. My bad. Fizz e is through a dash. But i still do not agree about kata. Because her dashes arent safe mostly. And thats what the op was saying

xd? her dashes are crazy safe. lets assume you are running and not attacking/putting yourself in "danger"

E to anything behind you minion,teammate, jungle camp. W pick it up and E further away to minion, another jungle camp, another teammate. you lose 1 reset cause you are running obviously. so thats a minimum of 2 in a running situation. :/

Secondly the combo i showed is a basic play and very safe as it makes you difficult to hit with skillshots cause you dont need to land on the dagger directly, makes you slippery and you can change your mind and jump out at any given especially if you get a kill which is a very safe play. ALSO there are combos such as

Q (enemy champion) > drop W in current place > E to Q dagger > E back to W point > still have one dash left :/

katarina is a crazy safe champion and thats just a fact. sorry but i hate her safetyness myself and im a katarina onetrick who is crying for her to be nerfed all the time cause i hate playing overpowered champions (generally op not situationally op) her kit makes her nearly impossible to gank succesfully (if kat player has one spec of a braincell), she can jump in and out of fights at will, later in game has such low cooldowns that it doesnt even matter if you dont get a reset.

HP CrookshanksApr 12, 20193 votes

You forgot LeeSin and Nidalee .

Dr DogApr 12, 20193 votes

rek and yasuo arent assassins and kayn only is if your stupid and take the worthless form, kha zix is one of the most "in" assassins and not hard to hit with one cc spell and ruin late game because his "get out of jail free card" is a reset on kill and his engage and without his ult he cant even teamfight aka if he uses ult to get out of a bad engage hes worthless if you just start a fight after

akali is very high risk ever since her true stealth was remove along with her diver-type playstyle and shes in a generally shit place rn

zed is getting nerfed and has 2 dashes one of which is restrictive

shaco doesnt take flash and has only his ult to keep him alive in a fight after his q is used to engage

ekko is aonther assassin that you can just cc when he goes in a kill him before he ults out, even if he does it would be a waste if he couldnt kill anyone not to mention ekko is a shit laning phase unlike most assassins

evelynn is basically ALL melee range with her ult as her ONLY escape shes very easy to deal with simply by throwing down a control ward in a fight and she basically worthless

most of these are just petty hashinshin arguments because im guessing you lost to an assassin last game

fichdeApr 12, 20191 votes

This is what I said, this guy is probably a adc main and just wants to blame something because the assassins did their job.

CloudedLogicApr 12, 20191 votes

[{quoted}](name=Dr Dog,realm=NA,application-id=3ErqAdtq,discussion-id=4FXvAir2,comment-id=0008,timestamp=2019-04-12T15:44:52.968+0000)

shaco doesnt take flash and has only his ult to keep him alive in a fight after his q is used to engage

That is not a counter point. Its not that Shaco "doesn't take flash." Its that he doesn't have to. It isn't like the guy is strictly prohibited from taking it.

As for the the rest of it, the dashes don't really bother me all that much. Its assassin's stealth mechanics that bother me (along with other annoying champs with the mechanic like Vayne).

PedobearTheBeastApr 12, 20192 votes

most of these are just petty hashinshin arguments because im guessing you lost to an assassin last game

Leave Chadshinshin out of this :(

boricCentaur1Apr 12, 20193 votes

Hmmm yeah no maybe actually play assassin before making a post ranting about them since most of this is not how it plays out. Like saying they can get away from a fight because they have a dash is disingenuous since 90% of theses champions not have there dashes up to use.

Like Pyke basically has no dashes he's e is used to fight and has too long of a cooldown to be used twice in a fight and the only way pyke is running is out of a fight is if the enemies are stupid like he is a support so how the fight will play out is the enemy will go the the adc and pyke will use his e to save his adc not for himself. Also pykes ult does nothing to save him and if he goes in to kill someone with it after a bad fight he will just die.

Like I can basically go through almost all of those champions and tell you why they have shit escapes but that will take to long so how about you go play them and learn for yourself.

thefatlazycatApr 12, 20192 votes

firstly, separate camouflage and invisibility, they're very different mechanics, besides that though I'd agree on most cases, although Pyke really isn't much of an assassin due to his low damage, I still do agree though that increasing the cooldown one his E by maybe .5 seconds could help put a bit more risk into him, Yas and Zed however need someone who cares about all ten players in a game to give them mini-reworks

SyrileApr 12, 20192 votes

Because otherwise bad players cannot say "they take skill to play" while dashing around continuously and doing free damage without being punished for making completely horrible decisions.

And this is completely serious. It is to protect bad players. To make them feel like they are amazing so they will spend money. The game used to not need this, but now this is the business model. And it is one that always fails.

fichdeApr 12, 20191 votes

Is the little adc main upset? AWWWWWWWW, maybe if you were good at the game you would realize that 95% of these champs fall off after 20-25 minutes. If you just buy, even just tabis you won't get one shot, don't complain if you don't know how to play!

Edit: Why am I getting down voted, is the boards just a bunch of ADC mains today lul

kingDeDeDariusApr 12, 20191 votes

I do agree damage and mobility are both too high, and that most of those champs are too safe. I'd just like to add in champs like irelia, vayne, and riven

SuvanApr 12, 20191 votes

xd

HotarµApr 12, 20191 votes

Nah, leave my boy Pyke out of this.

Two dashes, invisibility

First of all, it's one dash on his E and a blink if he lands his ultimate. His invisibility has a huge indicator on it for when you're both in and out of ult range.

With a little bit of focus and patience, it's so easy to shut down Pyke. This is why pros say he's awful in organized play but decent in soloQ. Learn to focus him and you'll see why he's one of the riskiest assassins.

supahstromboliApr 12, 20191 votes

Please go play Shaco and tell me it's a fucking braindead champion.

Dorans PantsApr 13, 20191 votes

because riot found out that the Cod crowd just loves hypermobile-high-dmg champs, so they continuously double down on this asinine concept. This is why every new champ/rework gets more and more mobility on top of the usual kit and this is the reason you see them in every game. Even when they have a high skill ceiling they are so easy to pick up and look so flashy that even when you play like a complete moron it looks like you are a master of the game and it attracts the most impatient, arrogant and narcissistic types of players.

And what usually happens is people will often cite one situation were assassin are subpar and conclude that they are therefore balanced or healthy or whatever while happily ignoring the 100 other situations where assassins are just stupid. being able to catch everyone from everywhere you want - taken for granted. Unable to get caught no matter how bad you position yourself - taken for granted. The fact that walls mean nothing to you - ofc taken for granted, because how else would an assassin be able to work if he wasn´t able to stat check you from halfway across the map.

then there is the assassin snowball paradox where it´s completely fine for an assassin to be stupidly strong early because that´s what they are supposed to be while, at the same time, it is completely fine for an assassin to be stupidly strong late, because gee he got a few kills on a class that can snack kills left and right with ease, so ofc he will remain a dominant force throughout the entire game. It´s all working ass intended.

Everything that counters them is ironically deemed by riot as anti-fun and gets nerfed all the time while everything assassins stand for gets embraced wholeheartedly. More dmg, more mobility, more ways to jump around like crazy and easily dodge shit and punish champs that are slow or have telegraphed attacks, just putting all the agency on a mechanical level on one side while telling the other side to play the "numbers game" or the "team game" because that´s fun.

And that´s what´s comes down to, in the end, assassins have everything that is "fun" regardless of how effective they may be compared to mages for example, which leads to huge popularity which then entices riot to foster this design philosophy which means that things will only get worse instead of better.

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