Riot Members WANTED: Currently Sitting Atop 999 Normal Wins and Abstaining From League of Legends

Dear Riot Employees,

First and foremost, let me just take this time to let all of you gorgeous people know that I am thankful for all of the hard work and effort you've put into making this fantastic game. League of Legends is incredible and despite my initial thoughts of believing games of this genre couldn't be enjoyable, you gave me an entirely different perspective. I actually found that it was downright awful when I first started. However, nowadays it is unbelievably entertaining. The saltiness of the worst parts of the community made me into a keyboard warrior. But over the years, since 2012, those same types of players have made me want to play the game for fun instead of being the diehard "I'm in it to win it and you all better not lose this for me" player. Your community has given me the ability to provide a smile after every match and to laugh at the mistakes everyone, including myself, makes. Not just in League, but in every online game. I'm still working towards giving that simple, "gg," after every game rather than looking for another match right after a win or loss (mostly after losses in all honesty ;-;), but I'd just like to thank you for making me a little better at being humble in victory and gracious in defeat. =)

Now then, on to business. I would like to request my 1000th win, and we WILL win, be with a Riot employee. Why? Because I am refraining from my daily dose of League of Legends until this happens. Similar to the effects of various drugs, players that refrain from playing League longer than 24 hours go through withdraw. I'm certain that Riot would be devastated to see one of its players have to experience such an awful thing.

tl;dr It would be pretty cool if a Riot employee would play with me for my 1000th normal win. Whether you're Bronze V, Challenger I or Styrofoam III, I'd greatly appreciate the opportunity to play with someone who helps make this phenomenal game what it is.